To think if you’ve been beautiful all your life

[Itssundayiminlove]

It must be very difficult to age?

I was lovely looking when younger, ok older, but never beautiful or even pretty, but nice when younger. I have a friend who I haven’t seen for a few years, she was always absolutely stunning. I’ve just seen a picture of her and there’s a big difference in how she looks now (we’re mid-late 40’s now)

It got me thinking how that must be even harder than for the average person ageing?

I think we are all beautiful in our own way young and old.

😂😂 brilliant!

Is it just me that would have no idea if they are good looking or not? I mean I like the way I look in the mirror but not photographs, and I’m not sure which is more like how other people see me!

I think someone who has had a lot of emphasis placed on their looks their whole life will struggle more when they lose them.
If they think looks are everything, then i suppose they are lose what they deem to be “everything”.

however, there are some very beautiful people who are not overly focussed on how they look and know it is only one factor of life/who they are. They won’t struggle as much as the first category

I know people are laughing about the previous posters falling off the bike comment but I was once walking down the street with a very naturally stunning friend of mine in our early 20s, and a guy riding a bike turned to stare at her and rode his bike straight into a bush, falling off. So some people really are ‘men falling off their bikes’ beautiful!

I've never been much to look at although I’ve been happy most my life in one way or another. I’m in my 60s now and very content. The lack of conventional attractiveness hasn’t stopped me from having richly fulfilling relationships with both romantic/sexual partners and friends/family, who make me feel so valued. Ageing has been fine with the marvellous icing of being healthy at retirement on the top of the cake. I don’t care that I’m plain although I suppose there have been times in my life when I would have liked to have been pretty.

Doesn't quite answer your question, but I find it fascinating that some people (not necessarily those who were beautiful) seem to change almost beyond recognition as they age, whereas others look more or less the same.

It doesn't bother me at 63. Age levels everyone. I'm much happier as a person now.0

It did actually happen that someone fell off their bike staring at me!

It was actually pretty scary at times. I've been followed home by strange men several times. They would not take no for an answer - and I'm very assertive. The worst was when a passing taxi driver rescued me because he'd spotted a gang of lads trailing me. I dread to think what might have happened if he hadn't noticed.

The anonymity of this thread is the only place I'd ever write this, I'd never say it out loud...

...I was a model aged 15-18, and was considered beautiful. Hottest girl at school/university, had my pick of boyfriends, never queued or paid to get into a club etc etc etc. It all came with the inevitable side order of harassment and not being taken seriously, but whatever. I'm not going to moan.

Since I turned 40 I have really struggled with my weight. I am quite overweight now. This bothers me more than ageing. I look after my skin, but ageing is inevitable and I do genuinely see it as a privilege. I know I am not ugly. My face is still appealing, if fatter and wrinklier. But it's not going to launch 1000 ships and I'm fine with that. I focus on keeping my skin exfoliated and moisturised and glowy.

I’d really like to know what ‘fall off your bike’ beautiful is….let’s see the pictures!

I wonder what a world without aggressive male sexual entitlement would be like for women, whatever their looks. That is the elephant in the room with this question.

Like @Bloozie I was/am also what is considered attractive. I'm Swedish, worked in Paris as a model in the 90s/early 00's and am doing it again now part-time in my mid-40s. I don't think I have necessarily lost my looks and I am not desperate to cling on to a smooth forehead also have never injected my face with anyhing. None of my middle aged or older modelling colleagues have. At least not to a noticable degree. There is an inner confidence there and an appreciation of the natural.

There are so many 50+ women out there who will never lose their looks as long as they don't mess with what nature gave them. Like Helena Christensen, Stephanie Seymour, Andie MacDowell, Diane Keaton.

I was never a looker and I’m certainly not now. Ageing doesn’t worry me, if you don’t like what you see, don’t bother looking at me. I’ve often wondered how beautiful people cope with the inevitable loss of looks as they age, and I assume that’s why many of them go the plastic surgery/plumped up face route, which often sadly ruins what they had left anyway.

Only if they value their looks above their values.

Having a kid made me age so fast. It was my second pregnancy (sadly a miscarriage for my first), and the toll the pregnancies took on my body is insane. I’m still recovering and I feel I will never capture my pre-baby weight or average looks which I liked (it was ok for me I never desired to be famous anyway lol)! I really can’t believe the toll motherhood has taken on me.

I'm by no means drop dead gorgeous. Was quite pretty from my late teens to late thirties. I still have my "good" days ( good night sleep, lots of water, good skin care ,hair clean and brushed...) but somehow, being a mum has definitely lessened the importance of my looks. I'd rather be a good mum than worry about my looks. I try to not make my daughter too focused on this either. It's very important to me as I worried A LOT about my looks for a long time (I became anorexic in my late teens. It was horrendous).

I can't deny that I'm not looking forward to my face dropping. I feel like my face hasn't changed that much in 30 years, but that it will ,and it's a scary prospect.

I dunno. A phenomenal face structure will always be beautiful no matter what age. Eg Emma Thompson

Tbh I cannot wait to start looking old (40 atm) so people do not put any great thing I do down to "oh everyone helped you as you look great"....
Nope you cunts, I am just smart and work like a horse.

Most women including myself become happier and more accepting of themselves as they grow older, looks become almost irrelevant.
It is only the fake and shallow beauty industry that likes to spread fear of aging. Wise women focus on health and wellbeing and are grateful for the privilege of being alive.

I was thinking the same when looking at photos of Bridget Bardot and Alain Delon. It’s much more shocking to see the difference when really beautiful people age. When ordinary people age they just look like older versions of themselves.

I’ve genuinely never been beautiful. It caused me a lot of pain when I was younger. But - now in my late 30s so not saying I’m old by any means - I actually think I’m more beautiful now than in my early 20s. I’m heavier, and I have wrinkles. But I know my body, how to dress for it. My puppy fat face has given way to some hollows which I think make me more interesting. But more than anything I don’t care any more, and I have a confidence and self belief than I didnt back then.

It helps that the skinny indie boys I coveted in those days now have a dad bod and have aged just as I have, so there’s a sense that time is a great leveller!

I really felt the change from around 55, not as early as 40's. It's that sudden realisation that people are starting to see you as old - it comes as quite a shock.

This feels like something that women who place an extraordinary amount of importance in looking beautiful, but aren’t tell themselves. Everyone else just….is. Aren’t they?

I could have written your post almost word for word. I looked and felt great when I turned 30. I've not long turned 40 and I barely recognise myself now. 10years and 2 babies later, I'm 2 stone heavier and getting greyer by the day. It's a hard pill to swallow.