Parents want to take us away but unprepared to consider children's needs?

[MamaFifi05]

I am totally aware this is a first world problem but want to know AIBU? My parents want to take me and my brother (along with our partners and my two children, 2 and 2 months) away for a weekend to celebrate my Dad's 70th and my husband's 40th birthdays. This sounds great in principle but all the places my Mum has found are unsuitable for our children (very steep stair ladder to the only room our toddler could use as an example). I've shared some alternative suggestions of properties nearby to the ones she's found, but she's implying I am ungrateful for not going ahead with her suggestions. I can foresee a stressful weekend for us all if I just agree but don't know whether to just accept that it's going to be inconvenient for us and go ahead. It doesn't really feel like a 'gift' if we have little or no say in the arrangements, and we don't enjoy the weekend because of that.

In your shoes, I would tell that their kind offer is much appreciated but it's not a good time to take such young children away - you'll be stressed and tired the whole time and nobody will enjoy themselves. Maybe you could have a deferred break in a couple of years?

* @PrincessOfPreschool
It's hard to tell from your post. Obviously the loft room would be difficult unless dh sleeps with the toddler in that room whilst you sleep in room with baby.*

This is the best suggestion OP.

Toddler doesn't have to be disturbed and if baby cab be bottle fed, you & DH can swap so you're all rested.

It strikes me that she has this rose-tinted perfect plan in her head and you're spoiling it with reality.

If she does change venue you won't hear the end of it. I'd probably go with a ReadyBed backup plan and let her sort it out.

Christ you sound delightful.

Unsuitable arrangements for a family weekend incl a small baby? Er, obviously not.

I wouldn't be walking into that one if you paid me. Your family wouldn't be comfortable at all and would get home exhausted. She's unreasonable expecting you to accept this and to face getting through the next week drained from the experience, especially when it's not necessary.

Your accomodation needs can be met and you've done the ground work.
If she wants you there, she can meet your needs or expect her invitation declined.

YANBU. Your mother should be trying to find a place that suits everybody. You and your husband will have a miserable time after sleepless nights and the kids will ruin any meals when they are understandably overtired and whinging/crying. My youngest is 18 and I still remember the hideous Christmas where he cried all night and the time we had to leave a b&b at 4am because we were worried our daughter would wake all the other guests with her crying to be picked up because she could see us in the same room. Your mum needs to agree to a more suitable place or you need to sleep in another property or not go. Good luck.