What do you think of this family house rule?

[Porcell]

People in the house are not allowed to come downstairs in the morning without being fully dressed/clean and moderately groomed.

This does not apply to school kids during the week. But at the weekends/school holidays memebers of the household are not allowed to be in pyjamas. They can veg out on the sofa but they have to be groomed and in clean clothes. Trackies are allowed.

Go on OP, these are your rules aren't they?

The mum is a control freak whose kids will be moving out the second they turn 18.

Is the rule to encourage teens to stay in their room ? I wouldn’t encourage this rule because I wouldn’t want dirty dishes in their rooms making the room smell stale.

Is that not the goal? Independent kids?

It's a weekend treat for me to come downstairs in my dressing gown and drink about 3 cups of coffee before anyone else wakes up.

What the OP is describing sounds like a 1920s boarding school.

I apply that rule to me. I would never come down in my PJs other than for a quick dash for something. My DH is the same. I don't expect it of the kids though.

I think it’s fine for you to live like this if you want to, but imposing it on others by making it a “house rule” is anal and controlling. House rules should be around practical things like flushing the toilet after yourself or putting the milk back in the fridge, not an excuse for you to micromanage your family’s personal choices.

Sounds awful

If your pjs are dirty after a night sleeping in them and teens are stinking of BO, have you considered you aren’t getting enough fresh air in the house at night? We need fresh air to breathe and stinky pjs in the morning is a sign you’ve been sleeping in stale stagnant air at night.

Independent kids yes. Kids that run off as soon as they can because of silly house rules, nope.

Your kids live in a dictatorship.

We dont have a rule about it, but similarly after breakfast kids get dressed. It can be comfy clothes but they don’t own loungewear or jersey tracksuit bottoms so couldn’t wear those.

I don’t like seeing them lounging about in PJs beyond 10am ish at the weekend. It takes 5 mins to get dressed, brush hair and teeth. It’s also a mindset thing, and in PJs they’re stuck inside. Once they’re dressed they can go out and do much more.

Exceptions would be if they’re unwell or it’s been a very late night eg landing back at 3am and everyone is jet lagged.

Is that you, mum?

Her version of 'standards' was everyone else's version of controlling, weird, unhomely, unwelcoming and shit. And yes, I did eave home at 17, and yes, my home is completely different.

I love cuddling with DD on the sofa, fresh from bed, hair all messy. At 14, sleepy cuddles are the very best. Once she's brushed and coiffed, she's not as huggy.

I’d much rather be dressed soon after getting up, but that’s just what feels comfortable for me. I wouldn’t impose it on anyone else, and wouldn’t like it imposed upon me. It seems a strange and overly rigid rule.

Independent, yes.

Rarely visiting because they're fed up to the back teeth of mum and her stupid house rules, no.

Independent kids yes, not drive them away with your anal and controlling behaviour.

If you want them to be independent, maybe try letting them have some say in their own routine.

Crumbs, I draw the line around changing out of PJ’s at around lunchtime if we are just having a day at home.

This is why I'm not living with other people again. No batshit rules like this.

Good Lord, what on earth are your kids doing at night that they wake up in dirty pyjamas and stinking of BO?!

Whoever the mother is here needs to get help for OCD and control issues because this is, quite frankly, fucking insanity.

It's not a day off if I can't have breakfast in my pyjamas.

It's a fine rule. Bedwear is for bed. Dress comfortably by all means. Laze about in bed if you like. But once you are up, commit to it. Better for your mental health. More pleasant for those around you. No need to stew in your filth all day. There are clothes that aren't three piece suits and ballgowns. You can relax and be clean/dressed. And more relaxing to be able to answer the door or run out in an emergency?

I guarantee that they won’t continue the rule at uni.

Honestly, I think it's completely insane and ridiculously harsh that someone can't wear their pyjamas downstairs in their own home. Bonkers, and very unwelcoming.

I’m nearly 60 and I love slobbing around in my pjs and dressing gown of a morning. And I manage to be a fully functioning adult with a job, friends, family and everything.

Some days I even do said job in my pyjamas and yet the world doesn’t end.

Im just glad I didn’t grow up in a home like the one in the OP ruled by a control freak