New boyfriend won't dine out. Ever.

[Beautifulbouquet]

I've started seeing someone. He told me yesterday that he doesn't like dining out. Ever.

He would rather I cook or he cooks and if the relationship continues will apparently never go out for brunch or lunch or dinner with me.

I could of course dine out with friends without him. He would not come for example to any meal with friends he was invited to.

His reason is he is vegan and he says he doesn't trust chefs not to contaminate his food.

I honestly feel like saying I cannot see this relationship going anywhere.

How on earth do men like this get dates?

Don't use Wikipedia as a source as anything political there is 'policed' by (ironically) anti-police leftist activists. Use a neutral source 👍🏾

@Lentilweaver

you would think so, but then again there is a poster on here whose husband doesn’t ever eat out in case anyone overhears his conversation…

My daughter became a vegan in 2012 when it could be quite difficult to get a vegan meal in a restaurant. It was frustrating at times.

But she came to every meal (sometimes eating beforehand) to enjoy the company of the people she dined with.

Your boyfriend would have no problem having a vegan meal out nowadays as it's become mainstream.

He's being a miserable git.

Ah yes, sounds about right. Reminds me of someone who isn’t an animal lover but is vegan. Thinks sausages are disgusting - ice cream too because of the UPF nature. (I do know how it’s made and have read UP People.)

He might be vegan but the over-arching reason here seems to be a form of extreme anxiety and control issues over food. I know someone who won't eat anywhere but her own home and all food has to be cooked by her. It's irrational of course, because she'll open a tin or packet and she has no idea what went on in that factory where it was processed. She will go to parties and barbecues and weddings because can get around eating in front of other people by pushing a bit of buffet food around a plate and then just ditching it, but she would have a meltdown at being invited for dinner because she'd find it hard to disguise the fact that she's not eating the food you cooked and put in front of her.

If he wasn't a vegan he'd probably be exactly the same, he just wouldn't be able to make it about his veganism and his distrust that someone won't accidentally or deliberately adulterate his food with animal products.

I quite like Tofu but in a sandwich? Was the bread vegan?
Frankly he sounds awful for a variety of reasons OP and I am sure you can do better

And this would be a reason to ditch him I'm afraid. It will become UNBELIEVABLY tedious and restrictive for you, having to plan your life around this for years on end if the relationship goes the distance. And I imagine there will be absolutely no room for compromise on his part, all the compromise will have to come from you.

I made this last night:

https://www.lazycatkitchen.com/shredded-tofu-tacos/

Ok. But he literally got two slices of brown bed and crumbled some tofu from the packet onto one slice using his fingers then ate the sandwich.

Then offered to make me one.

Which is different x

if the relationship continues will apparently never go out for brunch or lunch or dinner with me.

He did say once that he would never go on a beach holiday.

He also doesn't have a car so going anywhere eh day trips is difficult.

He wears the same clothes constantly

He also refuses to wear anything that isn't black. Because his favourite colour is black.

It's quarter to 11 and he's not said good morning.

He won't open the blinds as he says people will see his stuff and then steal it.

I'm sorry to tell you OP, but he's quite obviously a vampire.

He clearly has a whole host of issues and you should avoid him like the plague.

That was for some general tofu inspiration. I'm not even vegetarian let alone vegan. I just like all types of food. What did you do about food while he was eating his?

Your soon to be ex would find my kitchen very racist. My most used pan is a wok

Eating deicious food is important to me so the relationship wouldn't even have got this far for me.

This relationship was nice when it lasted, but it just doesn't have the legs to go long term. He's too weird. Too inflexible. All the good things in life would be impacted by his fussiness. No meals out, no cinema, no holidays, no travel at all.

It's nothing to do with him being Vegan - my son is Vegan and he eats out all the time, also travels loads.

Add to that the bonkers shit like sitting in the dark, and not driving. Jeez, he's a total weirdo, sorry.

i cant actually believe after listing all you have about him that you havent blocked straightaway. what a misery guts he is.

I'm afraid I'm with him about the cinema. Something that's happened as I've gotten older and I also hate the aircon.

The food thing is a deal breaker though.

I love eating out so this would definitely be a deal breaker for me. No meals out at all as a couple? No.

Sits in the dark and is afraid of sunlight.

Always wears black.

Terrified of food being contaminated by animal products.

When he first came round did he stand on the doorstep and wait to be formally invited in?

Because I think what you have here is a reformed vampire who is trying not to fall off the wagon.

One sniff of a bacon sarnie and that's it - fangs at midnight.

Op, I thought I was over my morning sickness now I’m a few weeks away from delivery but tell him he’s brought it back with his tofu sandwich. 🤢 The thought of the texture of cold or room temp tofu sandwiched between what I imagine to be cheap brown bread, and how bland tofu is without being fried in any spices etc, is actually making me gag. 🙈

Book a table for two at your local vegan restaurant

I just popped on to say I’m disgusted by your racist spice cupboard, OP. I hope you can live with yourself and your pantry apartheid set up.

(is he any good at sex?)

I agree, but at the same time, if he's so weird and uptight about this, what else is he weird and uptight about?

It's not like a nut allergy where cross-contaminated food could kill. It's probably just an outlet for out of control anxiety, which could erupt anywhere. OP would be forever walking on eggshells, or whatever the vegab equivalent is!

Also, a potato q six tomatoes don't make a balanced, healthy meal and neither does a tofu sandwich.

He's tight. Bin.

Cold tofu sandwich 🤢 I've got the ick on your behalf op. Dump him

You do realise when he say either you or me can cook instead he means you forever or at least 90% of the time ? Even when you've planned to go out to eat with friends he'll still expect anyone cooked meal from you as well. So that yay I don't have to cook tonight feeling will be you