Partner Freaked Out By Women Who Fart/Poo (so yes, all women)

[ThatNavyGoose]

Basically the title - I have been with my partner for almost 8 years and he is a wonderful partner and Dad to our children. BUT - he has never farted in front of me and I have never DARED to fart in front of him. I have never heard him fart even once. He is completely freaked out by the concept that women fart/poo. I pooped a lot in labour with our baby and he pretended like it never happened and has never once acknowledged it. He says he feels this way because of how he was brought up - his parents were exceptionally strict about farting/burping and he used to get in lots of trouble for it, so he finds it really rude/disrespectful and it freaks him out. Our sister in law burps all the time and he will literally get up and leave the room because he can’t stand it. I don’t WANT to fart in front of him particularly but I still worry about one slipping out because he’d be totally disgusted and I’d be mortified. Is it unreasonable to think that after 8 years together he would have relaxed a bit?!

did he never set light to his flatus?
🤣🤣🤣

I’m with your DH. Farting is a natural thing, but people who let rip in front of people are disgusting.

WRT your pooh in labour, it’s likely he never said anything to you because he didn’t want you to feel embarrassed. Because while poohing is a natural function, nobody wants to do it in a situation where they have no control over it. My partner wouldn’t be freaked out over it, but he knows I would be mortified, and as such wouldn’t say anything.

And your thread title is disingenuous. Your DP hasn’t said he’s freaked out by women poohing/farting, you say he doesn’t do it either, so clearly he just agrees with many others that to do it so publicly is just bad manners.

This post makes me very pleased to be married to a medic, who has seen literally everything and is never bothered.

I feel exactly same and yes it's stems from shame in childhood. Thankfully my dh is understanding and try's not to do it in front of me . I don't freak out if I do hear him though and weirdly I'm ok with my kids doing it. How was he with nappy's?
But yes if someone was burping at the table I would feel sick and leave/not finish.

Hopefully they'd all be grown ups if they found themselves in a situation where a woman they knew ended up pushing the entire removable contents of her abdomen out of her body in a hospital room.

Sorry but I'm with the DH. It doesn't sound like he wants women to behave differently, more that it thinks it's impolite for people to do those bodily functions in front of others.

I totally agree. I'm not prude nor do I deny facts about bodies, in fact I'm a nurse and deal with these things everyday no problem. But no, I don't think it's nice to fart or use the toilet in front of others if it can be helped. Being yourself at home doesn't mean acting as disgusting as possible.

We fart in our sleep so nothing you can do about it. My Aunt used to be like this and said she never burped (must have been something wrong with her as it is quite normal). One day she was with my SIL and let out a rip roaring fart! My SIL said nothing but I would have done!!!!!

Trumping? Five year old s call it trumping.
And trump (ing) is almost a byword for megalomanic idiocy is't it??!!😀

its a normal bodily function. You have sex with your partner but you can’t fart in front of them?

Because

He is completely freaked out by the concept that women fart/poo

Every animal fart/poos... if he is so freaked out the he needs some help.

Literally started to type this reply and can tell my husband is waking up as he just farted.

He's not properly awake yet but I know I often fart when in between awake/asleep too.

I do wonder how your DH would react if you accidentally farted in your sleep?

When DH and j started dating we both had such tummy ache at night/in the morning especially due to trapped wind. We don't fart excessively as it is pretty disrespectful but we also don't expect the other to not have bodily functions or to get out of bed etc just to fart. We know exactly what the other is doing if they roll over in bed to point their bum in the opposite direction!

Because he's got a phobia of human bodily functions, that's why.

Gosh he should avoid our house, we are active farters!! Well in front of each other, I have IBS so it's hard for me to keep it in.

How does he feel about vaginal flatulance?

The amount of uptight posters about letting one go is hysterical. 😆 One does not fart. Can't Imagine how some deal with a dose of holiday diarrhea or other.There is no way people go for years not accidently farting In front of partners. How will you all manage if doubly incontinent when aged? Lighten up, a sense of humour works wonders.

I know everybody farts/poos and it doesn't bother me. However, apart from with my kids, I don't need/want to hear about it or deal with it. It's not disgusting or shocking but just something I'd rather not think about with other people.

Lol, this is going to be very torn. You'll have those who say it's natural and that people should get over it and deatigmatise it...

...and you'll have those with manners.

Let's face it. However 'comfortable' you are around people, is it ever 'nice' to subject someone to that view or those smells?

It’s good for the body too.

My DH is the same and I still fart in front of him 😆My Dad was also the same. He would take himself to the loo if he needed fart while my mum would sit beside him and force them out while killing herself laughing.

I've been with DH for seven years, and have three kids. We have never farted on purpose in front of each other.

They have slipped out on occasion; my favourite being when I was laughing and accidentally blew off, and the farts kept coming with every 'ha' I made 🤣 they were so loud as well 😂

I’ve been with DP thirteen years and I’ve never heard him burp or fart. I would describe him as quite a repressed individual generally, though.

I try not to fart in public but I have no qualms about it in my own home, and neither do our dogs. So he gets plenty of exposure therapy here. We eat beans and legumes every day so I’ve no idea how he keeps it all in!

I was brought up by a magical non farting or burping mother. Father much less Methodist and horrified, and would excuse himself without drama if something slipped out and go about his business. Which I think has to be the way to go.

It surely isn't possible for neither of you to have heard each other fart or burp for eight years? Never farted on his leg in bed? You must sleep with one eye open after a cauliflower cheese.

I still worry about one slipping out because he’d be totally disgusted and I’d be mortified

I don't go around lifting a cheeky and chortling at myself like something out of Viz, but especially as you get older and things relax in that department, it is going to happen inadvertently here and there and mortification and disgust is no way to live.

It's going to happen at some point, you've just managed to extend that early bit of dating where you're trying to pretend you don't fart or have to do a poo ever out over eight years. Nobody really enjoys that bit, do they? Trapped wind is very painful.

There should be basic politeness - not farting deliberately in public and endeavouring to keep bodily functions private if you can help it, but it is very unhealthy (physically or mentally) to be so uptight about natural bodily functions.

If he thinks women don't/shouldn't fart I guess he has never been to a yoga class then !😆

I was going to post that! “Oh! Celia, Celia, Celia shits!”

There seems to be a dichotomy on this thread between “farts and other bodily functions are hilarious and should be enjoyed at all times” and “farts and other bodily functions are mortifying and we should pretend we don’t have them” Surely most people are in between? I wouldn’t purposely fart in front of DH or think it funny, but I wouldn’t be mortified if I did by accident and I wouldn’t expect him to be disgusted. We are all human.

I've been married 40 years. Never farted in front of my husband and never heard him fart. (Obviously we know each other do fart and poo)

his parents were exceptionally strict about farting/burping and he used to get in lots of trouble for it

That's why.