My neighbour has been annoying me for months and months

[Neighbourissuedaily]

I couldn’t take it any more today and snapped at her to just fuck off and leave us alone.

She moved in just over 2 years ago and was overly friendly from the start but I thought it was just her trying to be nice. About a year ago she seemed to be there every time either of us left the house.
She started asking could she add a few bits to our weekly grocery delivery and then didn’t pay us back so after 3 weeks I said sorry we won’t be doing that any more.
If dh goes in the garden she’s there asking for help with something, in spring and summer she wants him to cut her grass for her and when he said sorry he’s busy and doing ours then we have plans she text me to say I’m controlling not allowing him to help her ??

Knocking all the time asking to ‘borrow’ Dh for lifting something / fixing something / etc etc

Wanting to park on our drive often and when I say no she does it anyway ??

EVERY bloody weekday morning she’s there waiting by the car wanting a lift to school and sometimes dh drops me to work on the way and then there isn’t enough room for her and her dc and she will say that I should make my own way then storms off !

There’s more as well I can’t list it all but she’s suffocating and relentless and so so needy.

Today she has been texting asking can dh drop her to the out of hours as she hasn’t felt well. I said no we are busy she should get a taxi. She then came round to ask dh herself and when i said he was busy she said ‘you don’t own him !!’

I’ve told her to never contact us again that we find her exhausting and are considering moving . She told me she wouldn’t be so persistent if we were ‘better natured’ and ‘helped without pressure’ 😂😂 which was when I told her to FO and shut the door.

She text afterwards to tell me I’m very selfish and I don’t have a ‘village mindset’ !!

My advice if you want her very definitely to leave you alone would be to ask to borrow a large sum of money from her. If she says she doesn't have it, whine "but you can take out a loan and I can pay you back!" I'd be surprised if she wasn't running in the other direction after that.

Thank you.

This is amazing advice. Definitely something I'll be holding onto, ready to pull out when I need to be shot of someone 😁

She actually sounds unhinged. That isn't normal, the lack of awareness
I would try and get a restraining order

I am now 70+ and it took me until I was 50ish to learn to be coolly polite with new people and to politely cut short conversations. You just don’t know what you’re getting. I never trust anyone who is over- friendly when you first meet them.
well done for telling her to Fuck Off. She deserves it and she is not normal.

She sounds awful. She has abused your kindness and is now behaving like there is something wrong with you for not say yes to all her requests.

Both of you should block her and ignore her. And explain to your husband that he has to be on the same page as you, because if he caves in, and talks to her or helps her, she is going to think that he really likes her and in her head she will paint you as the bad one.

i feel sorry for her child-has she any family around?

Well, block her number, obviously.
And in person, say, 'No' and keep walking. Stop saying, 'Sorry'; you're not.

This goes well beyond cheeky fuckery, this is extreme entitlement and lack of boundaries. To call someone selfish because they won't pander to your every want/need is just ridiculous.

Just tell her you don't have a mindset to be taken advantage of- and that the next time she parks on your drive you will clamp it.

She sounds suffocating and nauseating. I don’t blame you for losing your rag I think sometimes it’s the only language they know.

I had a neighbour who wanted to park on my driveway as they had on me car more than they had space for. When I declined as I used it she said I could park on the road and pointed to round the corner.

I honestly cannot abide CFs.

One CF neighbour rang my doorbell at 1am. She said ' You know my mother ' waving her hand vaguely (I didn't)
'And?' I asked.
'Can you lend me a tenner to get to work?'.
'I don't think so sorry'
I slammed the front door shut. I should never have opened my door at 1am in my nightie as well.
She never came back.

You need to completely ignore her. Block her number ignore the door, and ignore her if she starts talking to you on your drive. Put up a 6 foot fence in the garden to block her out. There is no need for you to talk to someone like this.

Personality disorder isn’t something to use to describe shitty people

Typical freeloader, we have one the same - haven't spoken to her for a long time now and never will. Block her number.

OMG!!! She sounds totally bonkers!!! Feel sorry for her kids 😬

She sounds like a character from a sitcom

😂

what a nightmare she sounds telling her to FO was deffinetly understandable 😂 do you think might have a little crush on your DH? Seems odd she always refers to him.

I've met a few people like this in my life and with them, it's been certain personality traits, their upbringings and past relationships.

Growing up with parents fulfilling every need, not having to face responsibility for their actions (especially finances), always having a safety net behind them. Then when they get to adulthood, they look for partners that will indulge that entitled behaviour because the partners then feel useful. (Maybe codependency, I don't know)

At some point, they start feeling entitled to demand things from friends, most friends then distance themselves.

They identify the softies and it's their go to behaviour whenever they need something done. Coupled with a sob story, the toilet paper OP mentioned is such a typical one. Who doesn't feel sorry for someone who isn't organised to buy enough toilet paper? Then that person is nice and primed for the next time, "can you help me hang this shelf".

In my experience, interactions with these people can get really nasty because they don't have a back up plan for when they get told no. My mum is one and threatens to kill herself to my little sister who lives 20 miles away and turns her phone off. My elder sister committed suicide 25 years ago so this obviously gets everyone worried. My sister calls my brother, who lives nearby, he then goes and gives her the money. Repeats every couple of weeks.

I know another woman in her 60s who is the same, feels absolutely entitled to live in a big rented villa despite getting divorced and earning no money with her self employment. During the divorce proceedings in her early 60s, she was told that she would have to get a job before she could apply for alimony (no kids). It was absolutely unimaginable for her to do that, instead she called around ALL of her remaining contacts and begged for handouts, even from her ex mother-in-law with dementia and a tiny pension.

I think at some point there's no helping these people because they don't want to or can't learn to be independent and responsible for themselves. You just have to distance yourself and have boundaries.

I think I’d avoid all conversation with her after her batshit rudeness. She’s a neighbour and she’s acting like she’s your daughter / sister, wanting way more favours and support than is reasonable. In fact I think I’d say that: “You’re our neighbour, not our daughter.”

Hahahahah!! This is genius!!!! Love it!

Hahaha nothing I like more than 6 eggs before my nice creamy pint 🤣🤣🤣

She really knows the way to a man's heart 🤭🤭

Her dream is to move your husband in with her and feed him eggs, sausage roll and Guinness until his dying days.

Watch out if she comes around yours offering you food, it will probably be made with poisonous mushrooms or something.

She's probably convinced herself that he prefers her and needs rescuing from OP

How has it been recently, OP?

Block her, but must admit I've always wondered why some people share their phone numbers with neighbours especially in the early days of knowing them.
There are so many weirdos and cfers like OP's neighbour ready to take the piss, be nasty or totally unhinged.