For being rude to an old lady

[ThePerkyCoralPoet]

Doing my food shop at m&s, I was rushing to pick someone up after. I needed some jam. Lady was in the way. I said “excuse me sorry can I just grab that” she just stood there so I proceeded to reach for the jam.

She gave me the most disgusting look I have ever recieved.

So because today has been a long day I said “ I did actually say excuse me and I did actually ask you to move out of the way” to which she responded “it’s such a me first attitude” I said “you do realise you’re in a supermarket. And you don’t own the supermarket. We all have places to be and people to see darling” and I walked off.

am I missing something here. Have I not used correct supermarket etiquette

You have no idea. I’m 48yo and very much lacking agility. I struggle to walk some days, can’t manage stairs anymore and can be unsteady on my feet some days. I don’t use a stick and people wouldn’t know to look at me. I’m in serious pain every day. But I go to work and I do trot down to the M&S foodhall most days to get lunch. I wouldn’t be able to jump out of someone’s way quickly.

I didn’t think OPs original post was that rude, you were a bit obnoxious perhaps to the lady, but the follow up posts are just argumentative! So I’d go with you are probably unreasonable.

So if you feel you were not unreasonable, why did you post at all? It was just a supermarket encounter, even if it was M & S, nobody died and you were a bit condescending with the 'darling'. Do you want a round of applause?

You are very rude. You launched into a diatribe when she didn't immediately jump out of the way at your request. Just accept that you're rude and either own it or, better, be a bit kinder and more accepting of the fact that we all have to get on in society.

So why don't you change that? Be patient for 2 mins. Don't be unpleasant. Just accept that not everyone is focused on you and your needs.

OP: AIBU?
Everyone: yes
OP: NO I AM NOT. WAAAA WAAA WAAA

Plus, what's all this "Cheryl" nonsense?

I was in M&S with my 89yo mum recently and a woman with a pram asked us to move. She was polite. But we couldn’t. Mainly because my mum can’t move that quickly and she was still getting something. So she got cross. I stupidly instead of ignoring her then replied angrily. She then waited until we had paid followed us out of the shop and tried to ram me and my mum with her pram while shouting abuse at us.
I stood my ground and stood in front of my mum.

She’s 89. She doesn’t always hear and simply can’t move fast. She holds on to me.
I’m amazed how horrible people are to the elderly.

I find going out shopping with her really stressful but I want her to go out as much as possible.
I’m so sorry an elderly lady looked at you the wrong way and didn’t move quick enough. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Excuse me is a request with an implied question, it is not an order.

Maybe the person can make space for you, maybe they can't. You ask, they respond by moving if convenient, not moving if not.

Anybody saying 'excuse me' when meaning 'MOVE!' Is EXTREMELY rude.

Maybe they were all people like you, who are too busy and impatient to spend 10 seconds on somebody else.

You're as insufferable as the OP.

I assume because there is still an unspoken rule that one respects the elderly.

And despite what people seem to think on here, it's natural to offer words which describe things, we do it without thinking - tall man, young woman, man with red hair. It's just instinctive, we are taught it from childhood.

It's recounting a story, people describe things. How often have you said - Oh I was in Asda/Waitrose today and I saw Tony, you remember Tony, we worked together ages ago, No he's really tall and had dyed blue hair.

Those people obviously had places to go and people to see, darling.

60 isn’t fucking old. Age isn’t relevant, neither is M&S

I've had elders who've had falls.
It's made me more not less tolerant of them.

60 barely qualifies as old! She's still of working age and is most likely as busy as you.

Your needs do not Trump anyone else's whether they are older or younger, working or not working. You are unbelievably ill mannered.

If someone's in the way of an item I want I just wait my turn until they've finished getting what they want, rather than ask them to move. Often they'll notice and move for me.

This! SHE was rude (unless she didn't hear)

This
How condescending.

I presume you gave her some space and some time first so she could finish what she was doing and move before you engaged with her?

If you had stopped at "I did say excuse me" it would have been fine, some people seem to think that the best place to stand and zone out is in front of a shelf in a busy supermarket, it's baffling.

The rest of what you said was cringe.

I find it odd how offended people get at the mention of 60 being old. Of course it’s old, it’s not young and it’s not middle aged. It’s almost 3/4 of the way through a woman’s life expectancy.
Its not an insult it’s just reality.

I think that's how most of us manage in shops, to be honest.

She has no idea how old the woman is. She's just noting that she's older than herself.