To refuse DH a bottle of wine

[Fore]

My DH bought 8 cans of beer and a small bottle of bubbly last night. I've rationed the bubbly so I had some last night and whatever I feel like tonight. By 6pm tonight, DH had drank all his 8 cans. There's a bottle of wine I bought a few months back to keep on our cocktail cabinet as I love the bottle. He hinted he'd like some but then muttered 'hm the bottle that I can't have'. I then heard him say, 'i'm going to have some'. I asked him if he would please not. He has now been sulking with me all evening. AIBU?

Is it the money to replace it? If he drinks it and doesn't replace it then you'd have to spend more of your own money to replace it?

I'm not sure as if someone eats or drinks something in my house ones of us buys it again because we share the money so it's not an issue.
Ask him for the money then you're not waiting for him to replace it. Get him to bank transfer it.

The only other reason to not 'allow' my husband wine is if he had a drink problem.

Don’t let him have it, mine has drunk a bottle to himself, has gone to bed in a huff, ( conveniently, over nothing) and could be messaging a woman or watching porn.

Neither of which I am happy about, but won’t be able to verify..

I just suspect

Also mine would never replace the item, he never replaces anything, even when promised. after breaking something,

This one?

That's terrible @Shetlands you should have a candle in it

I’m a bit squiffy so haven’t read the thread properly but FFS just somebody drink the wine and move on.

BINGE DRINKING?!?? CALL THE POLICE!!!!

😂😂😂

I agree with those saying it’s a weird thing to be controlling over

If its a pretty bottle by opening it, it will spoil the look of it especially if it's a cork

Yes, it is binge drinking. He’s consuming more than his recommended weekly units over 1-2 nights. And then attempting to source more. Absolutely binge drinking. Absolutely a problem with alcohol. I’m not sure why you seem in denial with that.

YANBU. If he wants to drink more, why can't he go to the shop to buy some? I'm more of a drinker than my DH, but I wouldn't think to help myself to his preferred booze if I'd drank my own.

Not sure why anyone should accept a partner who binge drinks to excess every weekend, but ok then.

Fucking hell. 8 cans of lager over two nights is an alcohol problem 😂FFS i'm deeply in trouble then.

I don't think there's anything wrong with you having a bottle of wine as a collectible that you just like the look of. Opening it would spoil the look.

Maybe keep better stocks of allowable wine in the house, or consider if his sulking over not being able to get into the wine suggests a possible bigger issue with alcohol?

If he's had a few cans, like he has, he shouldn't be driving to get some.

It doesn't matter if you want to wear the bottle around your neck as a pendant...

It is yours. You paid for it. He has no right to it and you don't have to "just let him" because he wants it.

You are allowed to have things for yourself even if other people can't understand why you would like or want that certain thing.

He is a grown man who knows it's not wine for drinking so he purposely put you in an awkward position by asking and then making a fuss.

And after seeing your other comment it seems he has a disregard for your things and for replacing them so he doesn't deserve you to let him drink it anyway.

Of course he shouldn't be driving. I assume most people live within a half hour walking distance to a corner shop which sells booze though.

I agree. It's okay to have things just because they bring you some pleasure.

Drink, wine, beer, whatever...should be fun. A relaxation. Having 'a few' or a bottle, is really not an issue. Unless it is of course. If it's there to be drunk, who chooses when the time is right? If it's Art or just to be admired, frame it! If it's not, it really doesn't matter. As a brewer, I make all my bottles to be drunk, enjoyed, thrown over an errant lover, tipped down the sink to make a point or an aid to celebration. But never to be looked at. Please, just enjoy our hard earned efforts. Drink it and buy another. Help the economy, Jesus, we need it! No one ever grew an organic cabbage, just for it to sit on a shelf to be admired.

She has already said it was a bit expensive for her and something she purchased as she likes the look of it.

Your comment is passionate and poetic, but not everyone can afford to buy bottle after bottle just because someone else wants to drink it.

We are all suffering from the COL, someone else will have to prop up the economy I'm afraid.

But some bottles do have beautiful labels. I don't drink at all but when I do buy wine for guests who do, I buy the bottles with the labels I like. I can see why someone would want to collect them.

A whole bottle can matter, depending on the person. One glass I can handle. Two I'll probably be a giggly idiot. I've never gone beyond that. A whole bottle - I don't even want to think about what that would do to me. 😄

It seems quite a lot of people on here are in denial about this level of consumption - probably the ones who tick the box "No more than 7 units a week" on medical questionnaires. 🙄😂

He’s had 3 beers on a Saturday night?

Stop micromanaging the poor guy! Strooth! I drink more than that before the afternoon’s out!

Do you want to treat this man like your child or your partner?

I’ll give it to you on the falling asleep by 9pm though, how bloody boring. He needs to sort that out.

Jeez let him have a glass of wine.
I've had a bottle and a half tonight off to rehab now considering some of the comments on here.

Awww, Mateus Rose - that's a blast from the past! 😂

Dh is a binge drinker. That would be the problem here. No doubt it's the root of many problems in your relationship.

This place is unbelievable sometimes, are they all living in a monastery?