My new boyfriend hates me speaking to my kids dad

[Purplepanda17]

So I've been with a new boyfriend for about 5/6 months and right from day one he's always hated me speaking to my kids dad.
Me and him split up about 5 years ago, when our youngest was under a year old, and we've always co-parented well together, and communicated well regarding our 2 kids. I get on well with his new partner and also communicate with her well too.
However my last partner hated my speaking to my baby daddy, and now my new partner does too. My new partner seems to get angry and really jealous.
So a typical convo with my baby daddy might go something like;
Him - hi, how are the boys today? I'll be finishing work at 5 so I can pick them up on my way home and give them some tea.
Me - The boys are fine and OK that's great thanks.

Or he might ask me questions about school, or I'll text him and tell him if something has happened that he needs to know about, but generally when we talk it's regarding who's house the kids are at and who's doing them tea. Nothing more.

My new partner says I flirt with him and I've still got feelings for him and I shouldn't talk to him as nicely as I do. He gets insanely jealous if me and my kids dad have to ring each other for something and says we flirt on the phone. Which I can guarantee we don't. He says our texts should be short one word answers and we don't need to tell each other things about the kids.
To me, I think this is wrong. Both the kids are still in primary school, they aren't old enough to remember to tell their parents things yet so they still need both their parents to be their voice.
Also when me and their dad split up, we both agreed we'd never argue or be angry infront of the kids, because we only ever wanted them to see us getting along, but now I have a new partner, I feel like I can't even talk to the kids dad about anything without my partner being jealous.

Am I being unreasonable here?

What does ‘insanely jealous’ look like? Tell me you haven’t moved this latest prize in with your small children. 🙏

Thanks everyone, I feel like it's not me that's the problem.
Also I don't normally use the term baby daddy, but I thought it was easier to write it on here so everyone knew who I was talking about, maybe I should have just said the kids dad 😬
Apologies for baby daddy 🤣

Posters who come onto a thread to snark at the OP for using the term, Baby Daddy without offering any other advice are sneery snobs.

OP it sounds like the beginning of a controlling relationship and I’d extricate myself and my children asap. Get a book called “Living with the dominator” by “The Freedom Project” - changed my entire mindset around relationships.

@Purplepanda17 be direct.
I’m a co parent and this is how I parent.
Put up or shut up and leave.

Personally I’d ditch the bf immediately. He’s already potentially harming your dc’s childhood by interfering in the way they're parented.

I agree with both of these points.

You need to find more mature men. Your tone in the example sounds polite and friendly - like you might use with a work colleague.

“Baby daddy?” Ick

He's being abusive. Your co-parenting relationship with you ex is none of his business. You need to get rid of him. He won't improve.

You need to choose more wisely. Has he moved in with you and your children already ? Slow down on that front too. You don’t need a man to replace the previous one.
Baby daddy is not a term I would use tbh. It’s sounds juvenile.

Any man who objects to you having a civil relationship with your DC's father and therefore co-parenting effectively needs to go. It's such a sign of a pathetic, insecure man.

You've done nothing wrong. This new guy is madly jealous and insecure. How dare he make up lies about you flirting with your children's father with zero evidence.
Your children are the priority and the fact you have a good relationship with their dad and his new partner is mature and decent and totally the right thing. You don't need this man you've known a matter of weeks sticking his oar in. Chuck him today.

He needs to go, OP . He’s sabotaging the children’s happiness and your self confidence.

Your boyfriend needs to shut up about how you parent with your ex. You will have this relationship with your child's father forever so any new boyfriend needs to understand and support it. Being jealous is ridiculous and childish and not in the interests of your child who he is probably also jealous of.

He sounds very insecure. Your kids dad will be in your life the rest of your life obviously it will be less as the kids get older. Your new partner has to realise this. I split up with my ex when my daughter was one, got with my new partner a year later and he never had any issues with me texting/phoning my ex as like you it was always about our daughter. I think if he can't get over it, with the relationship being quite new it might be best to walk away. You could otherwise have his accusations for the rest of the time you're together.

It's not you that's the problem but bare in mind things will get more complicated if you have more children with a new partner. Set out your stall from the start, he is dcs father and ypu have a mature, co parenting arrangement .

you're

You need to protect your co-parenting relationship with your ex for the sake of your children. This new partner is a walking red flag - I would get rid ASAP.

Sorry I don't normally use the term baby daddy haha!
In front of the kids I always say 'daddy'

Please don't worry about it

But I'd love an update to say that you've dumped the boyfriend!
I promise you OP, it is only going to get worse with him.

Your boyfriend is a wanker. Dump.

honestly, dump him.
You need to have a good relationship with the father of your children.
Your children need that and deserve that.
No bloke you're seeing should want or expect anything else than for you to work well with the father of your children for their benefit.

You're*
Won't let me edit for some reason

Maybe before criticising others you should check your spelling.

1. he is jealous, insecure, possessive and controlling . He is already causing problems.
2. He will destroy your amicable co-parenting to the detriment of your children
3. And worse, once your son/s reach puberty a man like this will not tolerate another man’s offspring in his home. From Greek tragedies to Hamlet to the Lion King to the fact that many homeless teens are boys who have been ousted by Mum’s New Partner, this is a common theme.

Ever heard of a typo?