Thinking it’s weird for kids to pay parents rent

[User788889]

My friend has a daughter (17) she charges rent. My family did the same to me growing up? Am I the only one who think it’s setting your kids up for failure and greedy to charge your kids for staying in their childhood home. I’d want my kids to be able to afford their own place not make it harder for them. Only thing I would do was pretend to and then give it all back to them…

2009 is new in my world 😁

16 years is about ⅓ of my life! 🤣

A bit more for me. Anything this century still seems new 😁

Bugger me, I didn’t know my daughter was on Mumsnet!! 😂

I’d like to ask advice from the parents who ‘make’ their children save. How do you do it if they’ve decided that holidays, festivals and getting pissed are all far much more fun? My dd saves nothing, despite constant nagging encouragement. If I didn’t take keep money, it would just get frittered the same way as the rest of her wages.

Don’t feel shit, I would have to do the same! She would no doubt have to pay more if she was living in halls x

This is not a new thing my 82 year old Dad used to pay his mum £5 a week board ,rent whatever you
want call it Out of his £30/week wage back in the 70,s
Just because you csn afford not to charge your precious little poppet anything doesn't mean everyone Can.

My brother has been living at home and paying rent for over 35 yrs now.....it would be weirder for a 50 something yr old to have never paid rent all these years!
(I mean beyond the weirdness of never leaving home!😂)

I paid my mum keep as well in the late 1970s. Full time job when I was 16.

Yeah I left school in 1990 and whilst I did go ti college loads of kids went straight from school into full time work
My dh left school in 1991, and did a YTS and had to give his mum somethings.she couldn't afford to save it all up behind his back for him m she needed the money.

I hope my son doesn’t think I’m saving it 😯 It goes straight into my Octopus utility account.

I paid 'keep' when I started working full time, then rented a shoebox flat for a short while before moving back in with my parents whilst I saved a deposit for a house (I am too far from a minimalist for shoebox flats); when I moved back in, I was given the option of not paying 'keep' each month if I was willing to show I was putting the same amount into a savings account, which I did. It meant I could save quicker, but I'm very aware of how fortunate I was that my parents could afford for me to do that. I still brought shopping and takeaways for us all at times though, as to my mind that's just part of being a household.

I think that taking a small amount which is saved and given back as a deposit is a wonderful idea, obviously if possible as everyone circumstances are different

My three children did boomerang a bit after various uni degrees and if they were at home and working they paid rent. It was minimal.. iro £25 per week maybe 10 years ago but it gave them the idea that living isn’t free. They are all now homeowners.
On the other hand a friend let her daughter and boyfriend live totally rent and bills free in their house whilst they were abroad and said daughter now has no savings and no house deposit as they got used to having everything paid for them. I know which I would prefer.

We can afford to not take any “digs” but we will be asking our adult children who work full time to contribute towards the bills because it doesn’t sit right with me otherwise that full grown adults could be earning close to 2k a month and not contributing to a household they live in. And no we won’t be saving it to give back to them either 😁

Yeah my sons will too when he finishes college and start ,s earning.

My son is 17 almost 18. He has a part time job around college earning a grand a month. I take £100 off him a month. He’s almost an adult and needs to start contributing to what he uses in the house. If he’s still at home when he gets a permanent full time job it will be £300 a month. He needs to know life isn’t free. How is that setting him up for failure? He will still have plenty left to save for his own house one day. I will always help in other ways, when he gets his first car I will help him financially. When he puts down a deposit for a home I will contribute. However not every parent is in the position to do so and that’s ok too.

It doesn't
Can I ask ( I'm being serious) whst your son does to earn nearly a £1000 in a part time job ,I have an 18b year old I would live him to be aa committed.

Our eldest has paid rent when working and at college

I think I token amount is fine, but I don’t think they should be paying market rates. Some parents do take the piss.

They might as well leave home and have their own space if they're paying that much.

I had to pay my mum 'keep' when I was 15 and doing a holiday job. This was 1960; I earned £3 a week and had to give mum £2. I can remember her sitting at the kitchen table every Friday with her hand held out when I came in with my pay packet. I thought it was so hard.

Sorry what I meant by the going rate, was the going lodging rate, not the going rate of renting a place for yourself.

I find this pretty awful unless there's a back story.😮

Yes that’s tough. 1960, I can imagine it was like ‘kitchen sink drama’ territory, (if you understand the reference).

I wouldn’t charge mine to live at home unless wwas broke
I don’t believe in secretly saving the money for them either