To think my sibling is being totally unreasonable about sleeping arrangements on this trip?

[jd206]

Posting here for traffic because I need to know if I’m being mad or if my sibling is just being ridiculous.

We (me, DH, DCs, my sibling, and their DP) are going on a family trip soon. It’s been planned for ages, all agreed and booked. We’re staying in a big Airbnb-type place with multiple bedrooms. The plan was that DH and I would have one room, DCs in another, and my sibling and their DP in the third. There’s also a small box room with a single bed, which was just going to be a spare in case anyone needed it.

Now, sibling has suddenly decided that they don’t want to share a room with their DP because “they sleep badly together” (which is apparently news to everyone, including DP!). They’ve said they’ll be taking the box room instead, which means DP will now have to share with one of my DCs (who is 6 and not thrilled at the idea of sharing with an adult they barely know that well).

I told them that’s not fair and that they need to just suck it up and share with their DP as planned. They’re now saying I’m being unreasonable and need to be more flexible, and that the sleeping arrangements aren’t set in stone. But surely you don’t just unilaterally change things like this last minute?!

DM has now waded in and is backing sibling, saying I’m being selfish and that we should “find a compromise” (but what compromise? DH and I aren’t going to split up for the sake of their random issue).

So, AIBU to think my sibling is being totally unfair and should just stick to the original plan? Or am I missing something here?

TL;DR: Sibling suddenly refusing to share with their DP on a trip, wants to take the spare room, leaving their DP to bunk with my child. I’ve said no, now I’m the bad guy. Who’s BU here?

Why is your sister's DP having to bunk with your 6 year old? You and DH have a bedroom, DC are sharing a bedroom, DS and her DP are now using two bedrooms, one of which was spare. What's the problem?

I haven't felt this frustrated since the thread where the OP insisted her son was losing out the way that he and his girlfriend split their finances despite very clear maths proving her wrong!!!

But that still doesn't explain why her child would have to share with someone. Surely if this 'spare bedroom' was no longer going to be available, the child stays in the shared room with her sibling.

How does any of this mean that the OP's sibling's partner is suddenly without a bed, when they had a room all along? And why will the six year old now have to share with them?

I think MN have evicted OP so she won't be coming back and we have been left to amuse ourselves.

That is the only logical explanation. Well, OP should have bagged the bedroom, then. DC can share.

Ah! But then that room will become the 'spare' room which no one can sleep in because it's got to stay spare in case it's needed... See? It's all perfectly logical - and insoluble. A spare room has to stay empty otherwise it's not spare...

Anyone figured this out yet?

OMG yes! That was absolutely bananas.

Much more prosaically, I think everyone who pointed out OP was trying to get away with paying for 50% of the accomodation while using 75% of the rooms has got it right.

Because no one could be that obtuse, surely?

😂

It would be inappropriate for any 6 year old to share with an adult of either sex they barely know.

OP is a werewolf and may need to chain herself up in the box room in the event of a full moon?

Come on everyone it's obvious, OP is going to need a spare room so she can wail in private after they visit the Sistine Chapel

The spare room was for emergencies - not just the OP's but also the sister's. I think the sister not being able to sleep with her DP, maybe as he snores, is a justifiable emergency. After all, if the split is as I think (2/3rds the OP, 1/3 the sister) both have covered the cost of the spare room so can use it. The OP's nose has been put out as the sister has bagged it haha. And I think the sister has done this pre-emptively as she knows what her sister, the OP is like... sneaky. There, I think I've solved the problem. The OP's been blindsided when she thought she had it all worked out to her advantage. You've got to laugh 😆

I'm glad you posted that - as I skim read the whole thread yet somehow missed that.

I was going to offer hammocks or sheet wall or the Tardis as a solution - but clearly not needed.

Be careful what you wish for! The more OP has explained, the more banjaxed I am!!

Great point. But isn’t it even more inappropriate if it’s a man?

Weird how OP hid sexes through use of they/them pronouns. It seems to be one big trolling post.

Future threads about holiday bedroom unfairness between friends and relatives are going to be so boring after this.

This makes no sense. Dc share a room sister or her DP use one room and the box room seems pretty obvious.

Quite literally a boudoir!

I think we need a diagram.

Appreciate this update. And God bless HQ for leaving this up. Imagine the disappointment of never solving the mystery for all the invested responses!

After reading this I feel like I've been on glue.

Oh my word, a return of the box room troll?!

Hi future thread people. I am on page 2, completely baffled. 33 pages of this stuff and MN have commented? I am settled in for the duration. Catch up soon.

Spare by its very definition means 'extra to what is ordinarily required' so it's there just in case. 'Just in case' has happened so USE THE SPARE ROOM.