To think my sibling is being totally unreasonable about sleeping arrangements on this trip?

[jd206]

Posting here for traffic because I need to know if I’m being mad or if my sibling is just being ridiculous.

We (me, DH, DCs, my sibling, and their DP) are going on a family trip soon. It’s been planned for ages, all agreed and booked. We’re staying in a big Airbnb-type place with multiple bedrooms. The plan was that DH and I would have one room, DCs in another, and my sibling and their DP in the third. There’s also a small box room with a single bed, which was just going to be a spare in case anyone needed it.

Now, sibling has suddenly decided that they don’t want to share a room with their DP because “they sleep badly together” (which is apparently news to everyone, including DP!). They’ve said they’ll be taking the box room instead, which means DP will now have to share with one of my DCs (who is 6 and not thrilled at the idea of sharing with an adult they barely know that well).

I told them that’s not fair and that they need to just suck it up and share with their DP as planned. They’re now saying I’m being unreasonable and need to be more flexible, and that the sleeping arrangements aren’t set in stone. But surely you don’t just unilaterally change things like this last minute?!

DM has now waded in and is backing sibling, saying I’m being selfish and that we should “find a compromise” (but what compromise? DH and I aren’t going to split up for the sake of their random issue).

So, AIBU to think my sibling is being totally unfair and should just stick to the original plan? Or am I missing something here?

TL;DR: Sibling suddenly refusing to share with their DP on a trip, wants to take the spare room, leaving their DP to bunk with my child. I’ve said no, now I’m the bad guy. Who’s BU here?

Ok, you're renting an Air B&B with your sister and her partner. The rooms were allocated as follows:
Room 1 - you and your partner
Room 2 - sister and her partner
Room 3 - children
Room 4 (box room) - empty

Your sister now wants to sleep in room 4. That does not affect your children's room. What am I missing?

Yabu

They don't have to share. You have a spare room.
I don't understand why you are so rigid about it remaining empty. Firmly YABU

It’s been a long day and my brain hurt reading the OP.

THE UPDATE HAS MADE IT WORSE!

But it's still a spare bedroom that they can sleep in who is going to get ill ? You can't really gate keep a bedroom for an "if or but".

Are you on glue?

Ffs.

Well whatever it is it's the same thing everyone else on the thread, including the OP, is missing.

It's utter madness to shift everyone around for the sake of having a spare room.

Let sibling have the spare room. If it's needed they can shift out into their original room with partner.

Even with your explanation the room is still spare : 4 rooms :

1. you and your partner
2. your kids
3. your sister
4. boxroom your BIL

why should your sister only get 1 room so that 1 can be left sitting empty in case someone needs a break or is sick , it’s ridiculous .

Also, how long is this trip that you need to leave a bedroom empty in case someone gets sick or needs a break? I may be unusual, but when I take a trip for a week or two I don't make contingency plans like that. If somebody gets sick we just deal with it.

Why should their DP have to share with my DC

Why would your mind even consider that option?!

This cannot be real.

Who keeps a spare room in case of illness. Even by MN standards where the minute you leave a 20 year old alone for the first the house will of course burn down , that is just crazy.

They don't though?
It was spare. Now it's not.
Really struggling to understand why your creating drama here.

No wonder your mum is wading in to this too.. you are demanding to keep a bedroom empty for no reason whatsoever!

You are the one being unreasonable.

Why is it so important to you that no one uses the box room?

Just when I thought MN couldn't get any stranger!

If the OP doesn’t come back, this thread is going to haunt me for the rest of my days.

I think I've realised what has happened. Accommodation bill split 50/50.

OP and DH in room 1.

OPs DCs in room 2.

Sibling and DP in room 3, and
Box room 'spare'

but OP was going to slip her 6yr old in there 'not as a permanent bedroom, just a place for 6yr old to sleep (CF tactics).

Sibling has caught wind and is asking for box room to stop OP CF from slipping her 6yr in there. Now OP irritated as she thought she was getting 3 rooms for the price of 2 ! I just bet this is the scenario

Your kids were sharing a room so why can't they still share a room? Your sister using the box room shouldn't impact anybody and there is absolutely no sense in leaving a room empty that someone wants to use just in case somebody else may want to use it.

I'm honestly stumped by how you've managed to create a drama from it.

Did you have other plans for the spare room?

I think the OP has lost the plot, never mind being unreasonable! WEIRD!!

I don't know why everybody is struggling to understand. Of course your grandfather should get the fifth bedroom, the twins should share the bunk beds, and your vegan aunt should bring some oat milk. Sorted.

Maybe the partner snores or they are going through something don't make it awkward or is it a case of if they want it I want it !

Op

You have simultaneously said in your own opening post that the box room is spare, and then in the next sentence, that her sleeping in it would be sharing with your ds. Which is it?

So puzzled

WHY IS ANYONE SHARING?!

op you are batshit.

sibling: box room
sibling partner: original planned room
dc: sharing as planned
you and partner: original planned room