To think my sibling is being totally unreasonable about sleeping arrangements on this trip?

[jd206]

Posting here for traffic because I need to know if I’m being mad or if my sibling is just being ridiculous.

We (me, DH, DCs, my sibling, and their DP) are going on a family trip soon. It’s been planned for ages, all agreed and booked. We’re staying in a big Airbnb-type place with multiple bedrooms. The plan was that DH and I would have one room, DCs in another, and my sibling and their DP in the third. There’s also a small box room with a single bed, which was just going to be a spare in case anyone needed it.

Now, sibling has suddenly decided that they don’t want to share a room with their DP because “they sleep badly together” (which is apparently news to everyone, including DP!). They’ve said they’ll be taking the box room instead, which means DP will now have to share with one of my DCs (who is 6 and not thrilled at the idea of sharing with an adult they barely know that well).

I told them that’s not fair and that they need to just suck it up and share with their DP as planned. They’re now saying I’m being unreasonable and need to be more flexible, and that the sleeping arrangements aren’t set in stone. But surely you don’t just unilaterally change things like this last minute?!

DM has now waded in and is backing sibling, saying I’m being selfish and that we should “find a compromise” (but what compromise? DH and I aren’t going to split up for the sake of their random issue).

So, AIBU to think my sibling is being totally unfair and should just stick to the original plan? Or am I missing something here?

TL;DR: Sibling suddenly refusing to share with their DP on a trip, wants to take the spare room, leaving their DP to bunk with my child. I’ve said no, now I’m the bad guy. Who’s BU here?

I am right behind you!

The explanations are not explaining anything better …. Still genuinely confused how a previously spare room now being occupied by an adult , means them now sharing with a child. This is such a hard work post

Can you try one more time and explain clearly why your 6 year old is expected to share with BIL when they already have a separate room which is not a "spare" box room.

I’d love to hear your sister’s side 🥰

If this thread turns out to be legit it has to go to Classics.

'Hey sis, kids won't be sharing with an adult they don't know well. That's awkward for everyone. There's that spare bedroom though remember?'

That's it. Sorted. Why on earth are you both being so weird about it??

Threads like this get on my nerves. Why do people bother? What’s in it for them?

OMG OP I have never ever heard anything so nonsensicle in my entire life.

You must be an absolute control freak!

NONE of us understand. Why must there be a spare and why must the partner share with one of your kids?! WHAT?!

Room 1 - you and DP
Room 2 - kids
Room 3 - partner
Box room - sister

What the fuck are we not getting?

If your updates and explanation are correct you are the most unreasonable person I've ever heard of.

Is OP trolling us? They haven’t answered the question.

Maybe DP can't sleep alone and that's why random child has been assigned to cosleep with them seeing as OP and husband refuse to split up. Or something.

OP you said:

The plan was that DH and I would have one room, DCs in another, and my sibling and their DP in the third.

If you DC are in the second room, why does your child need to share with your sisters DP!?

You aren’t making any sense.

surely the new revised plan would be:

You and DH are in room 1

6 year old and sibling in room 2

Sisters DP in room 3

Sister in box room?

Why are they sharing with your DC instead of using THE ROOM DESIGNATED FOR THE PURPOSE?

But the room has been designated a a SPARE therefore it must remain empty no matter what

What is this need to go on hols en masse? Why????

So to clarify. Your 6 year old is now supposed to share with an unrelated adult, meanwhile a bedroom is empty because you’re insisting it has to be a spare. This is batshit 😂

why can’t your child go in the box room? Or on the floor of your room? I’d be doing that before they shared with a random adult especially if they are not comfortable with the idea.

Wait! So the spare room was never just a spare room was it? YOU actually changed the plans by assigning the spare room to your 6 y/o and now that your sibling wants to use it, you're pissed!

who is 6 and not thrilled at the idea of sharing with an adult they barely know that well

You've gone to the trouble of talking to your 6yo about this?

Agree...box room for dsis...however if she refusing to share a room with her dp by the time of the holiday the issue will be resolved as dsis be single and can just go into her room on her own ..

"Worked something out" - what, like using all the available rooms?

Maybe you should have booked a spare house.

Maybe it could be a trans bedroom, yes it was assigned spare at booking, but due to deeply held convictions can now convert to a proper bedroom?

Why DP is going to share with DC? DC had their own room, box room was spare so why DC is affected? It doesnt make any sense

Why are you forcing your DC to share with a person they barely know. Surely that is completely inappropriate, especially when there are sufficient bedrooms?

This is batshit. It's a spare room, your going away for a short amount of time. Why on earth would you have a room in case someone was ill? If they need space they go to there rooms. Your DCs are sharing a room together you have said?

Has she f.

You won MN today.

Hard agree with this post.