To think my sibling is being totally unreasonable about sleeping arrangements on this trip?

[jd206]

Posting here for traffic because I need to know if I’m being mad or if my sibling is just being ridiculous.

We (me, DH, DCs, my sibling, and their DP) are going on a family trip soon. It’s been planned for ages, all agreed and booked. We’re staying in a big Airbnb-type place with multiple bedrooms. The plan was that DH and I would have one room, DCs in another, and my sibling and their DP in the third. There’s also a small box room with a single bed, which was just going to be a spare in case anyone needed it.

Now, sibling has suddenly decided that they don’t want to share a room with their DP because “they sleep badly together” (which is apparently news to everyone, including DP!). They’ve said they’ll be taking the box room instead, which means DP will now have to share with one of my DCs (who is 6 and not thrilled at the idea of sharing with an adult they barely know that well).

I told them that’s not fair and that they need to just suck it up and share with their DP as planned. They’re now saying I’m being unreasonable and need to be more flexible, and that the sleeping arrangements aren’t set in stone. But surely you don’t just unilaterally change things like this last minute?!

DM has now waded in and is backing sibling, saying I’m being selfish and that we should “find a compromise” (but what compromise? DH and I aren’t going to split up for the sake of their random issue).

So, AIBU to think my sibling is being totally unfair and should just stick to the original plan? Or am I missing something here?

TL;DR: Sibling suddenly refusing to share with their DP on a trip, wants to take the spare room, leaving their DP to bunk with my child. I’ve said no, now I’m the bad guy. Who’s BU here?

OP please explain this in idiot proof words because you are making fuck all sense.

scenario of 4 Bedrooms you described:

• 1 double = you and DH
• 1 double = your sibling and DP
• 1 twin? = your children
• 1 single = empty spare single bed

Why the fuck would your child be sleeping with their uncle? Literally nothing has changed, your children still have the exact same beds as before.

Now its:

• 1 double = you and DH
• 1 double = IL
• 1 twin? = your children
• 1 single = DSibling

HOW have you come to the conclusion your child will now be moving beds????

OP wants to keep a spare bedroom which is ridiculous

OP wanted the spare room to stay spare, in case anyone was sick or something.

It seems reasonable to me that the sibling sleeps in it. Maybe her DP snores or they’re having relationship issues.

Still doesn't explain why the child and BIL have to share...

Post doesn't make sense. You saud box room was spare and DCs were sharing a room.

I would pay a lot of money to not go on that holiday.

The forth bedroom is clearly the doorway to another portal.

Pretty sure this is the floor plan of The Mexican House, so are you the owner or the thief?

Can you imagine what the food shop is going to be like?!

You should stay in the spare room, tag on!

Ah, but the child in the original room is at risk of being sucked into the Bed Void that is created as soon as the spare room boundary is crossed.

I am also confused BUT you need to advocate for your child, they absolutely should not be expected to share a bedroom with an adult that they barely know. Why would you or anyone else think that was okay? Put them in your room if you must, or better still tell sibling where to go!

La la la la la la la la

Evening, everyone. We aren't totally convinced by this thread and it looks like the OP has gone for a long lie down anyway (presumably in the spare box room). We're going to see them to the door but we'll leave the thread up because, well... GOD KNOWS we need SOME sort of resolution here. All guess diagrams welcome.

Jesus fucking Christ. I just read all of this.

We need a spare bag of crisps, in case someone fancies them. If someone DOES eat them, watch out, the Bagels will disappear.

Makes perfect sense to me OP. Why should your DC have to share with the DP.
Don’t let them grind you down. ^^

Apart from aaaaaaallll the rest, if a 6yo felt very ill overnight, they would be much more likely to want to sleep in with their parents than be on their own (or with a kind-of-uncle-stranger).

I think I'm married to your FIL!

This is one of the most batshit thing I've read. Even by MN standards.

Are you sure one spare room is enough, OP? You don't know what might happen.

I mean I'd tell sibling to go to the spare room if it was me..

which means DP will now have to share with one of my DCs (who is 6 and not thrilled at the idea of sharing with an adult they barely know that well).

If your sil or sister (can't remember) is sleeping in the box room, why will her DP have to bunk with your child? Why won't they stay in their previously assigned room???

I more than often side with OP but this time you are being unreasonable. There is a spare room so the partner can now have their own room. A spare isn't that essential. It sounds more like you have an issue with you sister often getting her own way rather than the actual rooms situation?

Why on earth does it matter if a person sleeps in a spare room one night or a million it is not a spare room in your house used for WFM it is a spare room in a holiday house

I've absolutely no idea what your issue is but I can categorically say you're being highly unreasonable! Good luck to your sister!