Am I being a massive bloody prude or is this the hill to die on?

[Joulesdog]

We have a 4 children. 2DS aged 24 &21, DD1 who is 13 and dd2 who was a surprise is 4.

DD1 is very into Taylor Swift, Sabrina Carpinter, Charlie xcx etc. she 14 and is obsessed.
I'm happy to let her listen to whatever (within reason)

As a family we have a shared Vinyl player that is DH's pride and joy. Each child wants to buy albums for the vinyl as they like the sound of it and whoever chooses the records on a Sunday gets to have them playing through Sunday dinner etc.

Oldest DD's birthday is coming up soon and she wants as part of her presents the Charlie XCX 'brat and it's complicated' release on vinyl and I said yes but Charlie xcx has released this vinyl album with white powder inside the record that moves around on the vinyl player and it's meant
To be like a bag of cocaine.

DH thinks it's hideous and sends the wrong message coming and I'd usually disagree and say things have changed since our generation but I think this is awful

If our daughter is correct then lots of her yr 9 friends will get a vinyl copy of an album where this is white powder inside the record that moves around when it's played?

Am I out of touch? I just think this is Insane

At 11 years old I was into Wham! and prancing around the house singing to "I want your sex" and Edge of Heaven...
I would lock you up
But I could not bear to hear you screaming to be set free
I would chain you up if I'd thought you'd swear
The only one that mattered was me, me, me
I would strap you up but don't worry baby
You know I wouldn't hurt you unless you wanted me to
It's too late to stop, won't the heavens save me?
My daddy said, "The devil looks a lot like you"

Not sure Smash Hits published it in their mag but I stopped the tape recorder to write down the words!

and My sister had the Frankie Goes to Hollywood single

....actually thinking about it now that explains a lot 😂

I took away a cd of my 13 yr old DS (he's nearly 40 now) and hid it because most of the lyrics were swear words and drug based! Gave it back when I found it, in his 20s. He laughed and said he'd bought it again the next weekend but didn't tell me! I had no regrets and told him so.

I don't think the white powder in the vinyl makes a lot of difference.

When I'm in the club, yeah, I'm (bumpin' that)
When I'm at the house, yeah, I'm (bumpin' that)
365, party girl (bumpin' that)
Should we do a little key?
Should we have a little line?
Wanna go real wild when I'm (bumpin' that)
Meet me in the bathroom if you're (bumpin' that)
365, party girl (bumpin' that)
French manicure, wipe away the residue

This is explicitly about doing cocaine in a nightclub toilets. And it absolutely glamourises it imo.

It's not a new thing and I'm not sure I believe it corrupts children's morals. Golden Brown, Perfect Day, and pretty much every era from the Beatles through Fleetwood Mac to Lady Gaga have written and sung songs about drugs.

I would say it's more explicit and less subtle nowadays with no attempt to make it poetic or hide the real meaning, but also trying to limit what children listen to is a futile exercise.

Since she's already listening to it, bringing it into the family space and using it to open up conversations about drugs, including about how boring and unglamourous (unless having 23p in your bank account, no sheets on your bed, and vomit on your clothes is hot nowadays) the scene actually is in real life is probably going to get you further than refusing to buy an album which will put you in the category of old fogeys who don't get it on a moral panic trip.

Erm... FGTH were NOT promoting the use of cocaine through their albums to teens! It was a song about a physical act that could be interpreted in many ways.

Cocaine useOP, 100% hill to die on. is illegal, life changing and damaging to all concerned. It also supports organised crime.

I wouldn't buy that even as an adult as I think it's pathetic marketing class A drugs.

I am not a particularly strict parent but I just wouldn't want that out of principal and it would make me not want to support the artist.

I would see if there is anything better she would like and if not try and get her the version without that on.

Even back in my day as a teen my Mum failed to ban my music.
My aunt had bought me, as requested, Guns n Roses 'Lies' album for my 14th Birthday. Mum saw the advisory sticker and took me right back to HMV where I was made to exchange it for something else. (ironically an album that had a lot of dubious lyrics about sleeping with underage girls, but it didn't have that sticker on the cover so she deemed it acceptable. I didn't actually consider the lyrics until I was much, much older).

The following week I made my pilgrimage to the record store and bought Lies on Cassette instead, removing the sticker on the bus on the way home and then popping it in another case altogether.

I never banned music when mine were small though, in the modern age it just doesn't work anyway.

I don’t buy into this notion that there is no point banning things. Sometimes the ‘banning’ is about explaining to a child why something is harmful or offensive, how it can cause hurt and why it is not good for society, and showing your child that it’s important to stand by your values. Parents have a responsibility to guide their children about what is right or wrong. Yes, teenagers may rebel and ignore it, but that’s no reason for parents to shrug and say it’s all too hard.

It actually makes me sad for a lot of kids that their parents couldn’t be bothered to express an opinion about what is right and wrong.

At one time the Sex Pistols were banned in case they brought down the establishment and ended the rule of law as we knew it. Now they are classic rock and played on Radio 2.

My 15 year old still thinks Simon and Garfunkel sang about "...a come on from the lights on Seventh Avenue.." after I lied to him about the lyrics when he was three. He has loved music since babyhood, and I had to shield him from Bob Seger's "Nightmoves", The Byrds and The Everly Brothers as well.

Depends on your daughter
mine is younger and squeaky clean and abhors smoking and drugs,
so the album would be a interesting talking point she would be a prude about it more than me !

but if you think this could in anyway encourage or make drugs cool fur your daughter don’t get it

the lyrics would require a chat too…

Agree with all this.

Are you trying to claim that pop music in the 80s didn't heavily feature drugs, alcohol and sex as core themes?!

There are plenty of artists in 2025 that I would be happy for my daughters to look at as role models, who might reference sex and alcohol occasionally but are generally about promoting the values I believe in through their lyrics. Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo, Billie Eilish, Sia, etc. are all out there singing about themes of heartbreak, mental health, friendship, female solidarity and leaning more towards exposing the dangers of party culture rather than promoting it.

Came back because I got a song about cocaine from 1999 stuck in my head and thought it should be shared... admittedly I was 17 when this came out, but I loved it and yet have never done cocaine...

https://genius.com/Buckcherry-lit-up-lyrics

But the lyrics ARE normalising coke!

Also - since when were vinyl records for teenagers? Has it had a massive come back? Because AFAIK it's usually a pretty niche hobby enjoyed by adults - hence the record player is her dad's thing and the rest of the family are into it because it's a family thing to be into it because of her dad, rather than she specifically would be into it if it wasn't such a big thing at home

Yes, vinyl records have had a massive come back. My local independent record shop is full of teenagers on a Saturday and the big HMV in our nearest city does a roaring trade - they also sell all-in-one record players which are very popular with teenagers, basically an updated version of the Dansette. Vinyl sales are the highest they have been since 1990.

FWIW my music collection at 16 was scrupulously clean and I would have refused to listen to anything with even the vaguest reference to drugs. I'd never had more than one alcoholic drink at a time, smoked a cigarette or kissed a boy.

And then I hit 17, went off to Uni, and went far wilder than any of those who had had a less sheltered adolescence.

I remember having my Def Lepard "Pour some sugar on me" cassette tape taken off my by my mother. I was horrified. Our relationship survived :)

Ha, my two year old loves that song! 🤣

Dont think my Mum ever really twigged what it was about as she'd do her nightly exercises to my Hysteria album 😂

Ed Sheeran The A Team and Bad Habits are both about cocaine. Assume you dont listen to him.

Billie Eilish and Charli XCX - Guess. Charli XCX is just as much warning and exposing the culture imo.

There's a lot of shit out there. It's not being prudish; it's having standards.

😳

I feel very old. I've dabbled in all sorts and consider myself very 'cultured' in such typical rock n roll dalliances but that is awful, it's screams try hard in a very basic sense.

That vinyl wouldn't get anywhere near my DC or my home.