Older relatives not understanding WFH...

[TickingAlongNicely]

I am self employed. I work from home. It can only be done at home, unless I lug massive bits of equipment away with me (I can't work from a hotel room for example).

My children are Secondary school age. They don't need looking after, just someone around really in school holidays.

Every school holiday from my parents...
What are you doing? (I'm working)
What are the children (homework, chilling, hanging out, resting. )
Why don't you come and stay for a few days (I'm WORKING)
What do you do all day at home (WORK)
Don't you want to spend time with the children (I do in the afternoon/evenings, I start work early...).

I'm pretty sure if I worked in an office I wouldn't get this barrage of questions!

@LaundryPond @Crinkle77 I feel your pain. I also work for a university. The number of people who say must be lovely to be off all summer. Nope. Not a school. We don't close when the students leave. It's worrying how poorly understood universities are.

Seriously?! I'd say it's a privilege to be able to WFH. You're trusted to do your work, just not in an office setting. At least people are earning a living, wherever they work from!
And WFH requires a great deal of discipline, self-motivation, and time management skills. It's not simply a matter of lounging around on the sofa, wandering round tidying rooms and just doing work whenever the mood strikes.
Your view is outdated and misguided, along with the many examples given in this thread!

Did they used to be though. Back in 80s/90s my friends dad used to go and take teaching jobs abroad sometimes in the summer?
I know people are on different contracts but even on tv they’ve always been portrayed as being off.

Did they used to be though. Back in 80s/90s my friends dad used to go and take teaching jobs abroad sometimes in the summer?
I know people are on different contracts but even on tv they’ve always been portrayed as being off.

I was a postgrad in the early 80s and worked out of a uni research lab late 80s/early 90s) - barely noticed if it was undergrad termtime or not, tbh! Of course people did go to some conferences (but so do people in other professions) and academics would occasionally take a sabbatical but that was to work with a research group elsewhere.

TV rarely reflects real life accurately.

Yeah I’ve had that one too, and the people who absolutely can’t comprehend why I pay for holiday clubs when I work from home. I am WORKING and although my child would be safe she would be bored shitless.

You can be flexible when wfh, that’s the point … don’t need to be sat at a desk 9-5, and who is anyway when they are in an office. Don’t you ever grab a coffee with a colleague and take a break?!?! When people work from home seems they have to prove how busy they are to warrant it.

Anyone in teaching will never admit to having time off. They are always much busier than anyone else, very over worked and ridiculously underpaid. They are martyrs to carry on doing the job … and will tell that to anyone that will listen!

Everyones mum’s turned up… 🤣

No. You might teach on an international summer school, or have a fellowship in an archive overseas for your research, but that isn’t because you’re on your holidays. 🙄

Yeah it’s frustrating. My Dad constantly phones me for lifts because I work flexibly and he does it whether I’m in the office, on a site for work or at home. And every time I have to explain I’m on the clock.

it wouldn’t be so annoying, but when I was young he worked from home quite a lot and always sent me to post letters for him and things because he couldn’t step away, so he KNOWS 🙄

Yep. I have primary aged DC. I told DM recently that work was a bit quiet at the moment. She thought about it for a bit and said "does that mean that you can look after the kids in the school holidays instead of them going to holiday club then?"

No mum, no it doesn't.

@KingTutting No. They didn't. I've worked in universities for over 35 years. The summer vac is when academics sort research proposals, do fieldwork, study visits, exchanges, establish collaborative relationships, open days, admissions, clearing. The list goes on and on. The undergrads may have gone home but the work goes on.

Slightly different. I worked shifts as a nurse for many years. When I was on nights I was reluctant to turn house phone off in case of emergencies. DH was a copper so he needed to be contactable. ( long before mobiles)
My dad god bless him didn’t get this at all.
Dad would ring. “ well you sound sleepy- are you tired?” Yes dad I’m on nights remember ? Oh yes. “Well aren’t you up yet ? “Dad I’ve been in bed 2 hrs? Oh.
This happened many times. Anyone who’s worked nights knows the hell of trying to get back to sleep before the next 12 hrs hits you.

All i can remember is he did it for extra money (he went to America). He was teaching summer school out there, I don’t think it had anything to do with his job here.

@Sickdissapointed OMG, this reminded me of my MIL. I used to work nights and we were staying at the in-laws for 3 days whilst renovating.

I crawled into bed from a 12hr night shift, and 1hr later, MIL decided to vacuum the hall outside our room, banging the bedroom door with the hoover head.

The following morning, the grandkids visited and MIL said they could come into my room and play with me! 😡

See, what you are doing is in part what causes this issues.

I couldn’t just have a quick coffee with a friend who has arrived unexpectedly during my working day whilst I was WFH.

Save for going to the loo and to make a cup of tea, I work solidly all day, and usually log back on in the evening to finish up. I eat my (premade) lunch whilst working. I work more hours on my WFH days than my office days.

I try to go into the office at least twice a week as balance - the commute means less hours during the working day and I tend to switch off on the way home making it far harder for me to just “log on to clear a couple of emails” or finish something off when I’m home.

But I have friends like you who do give the impression that they don’t really work when then WFH, as they can drop everything at a moments notice. Others then don’t understand why I can’t…

My friend’s daughter works from home. Her aunt popped round with something and was invited in. She was then was moaned about to her mum “She stayed for 45 minutes, I was supposed to be working “
Well don’t invite her in then!!