To think DP's Ex is selfish - RANT

[kiana2015]

My DP has a DS with his Ex, let's call her Claire. Claire works and also receives benefits, she rents a house and gets all of her rent paid by universal credit as well as the local council paying the top up amount. Claire also receives child maintenance. I have worked out Claire makes more than me or my partner. Claire buys herself new clothes every single month, gets her hair and nails done and goes out for coffee 4-5 times a week. Every month for the past 8 months, Claire has messaged my partner to say she has no money for their DS food. Obviously I would never see their DS or even her go without food but if it was me or any respectable person, would t it be wise to budget like a normal person, if you can't afford FOOD which is a basic necessity then cut out all of your own 'fun stuff' sorry not even looking for opinions more just a rant as it's really grating me. Claire also stops us going on fun family days out as she states she can't afford to do this so it's not fair we should, which in turn causes DS to miss out, if it was my child I would want them to have fun and experiences.

Well, it might be in his interest since apart from signing papers, he'd not do anything else. The op would do it all, since that's how their 'relationship' works. And he'd have more money to go to the pub with and spend on games.

You can't just give your ex evouchers and take it out of maintenence.

You would be liable for the additional maintenence that you deducted.

The amount ops dp pays probably won't be anything even near half the cost of raising a child anyway.

And ops dp probably made up this story in order to borrow more from the op because he pisses all his money up the wall or spends it on gaming.

There's no way a random ex, who does 100% of the parenting, because ops dp can't, told op all about how much she spends on hair and nails and coffee, and then starts suddenly begging for more money because she hasn't got enough for food.

I've just A/S the OP.

Oh dear.

I'd obviously taken this post at face value.

Women claiming maintenance are not borrowing money. It’s for their child

It’s true though. Child maintenance belongs to children

It's astonishing how many ex wives/partners with care of children spend every last penny of any maintenance on themselves and not on the children. There they go, swishing their shiny hair, flashing their nails, grinning with their expensive teeth while parading around in their newly bought clothes. That £7 a week goes a very long way. They're rolling in it.

In fairness I was going off the OP's original posts!

I agree with later comments that the kid needs decent adults in his life full stop.

This thread makes me think that child maintenance payments should ALL go through the CMS system, no exceptions, so RPs are getting fair amounts directly from earnings that NRPs can’t hold hostage because they had the gallantry to buy their kid a few potatoes

Good for claire. I wish her the best.

The joys of insomnia 😆

DHP is an amount paid for 3 months and then you can reapply- but applying doesn’t mean you’ll get the DHP - you’ll be in a position of being asked to look at your budget etc and up against others. You also have to provide bank statements

Sadly trying to do nothing doesn’t help

I have lots planned, I work

I’ll occupy my time how I like thank you, if you don’t like it you don’t have to do the same thanks for you faux concern though.

Why do you want my job?

I work for a company who are landlords, and I have seen housing benefit payments from the local council in respect of one of the tenants.

Have no idea why your posts have been deleted @AmpleRaven i certainly didn’t report them.

I’m sure you think you’re clever accusing me oh being another poster but you’re just coming across as weird and creepy.

i don’t work nights or early hours. HTH

If she is working then she categorically does not get "all her rent paid" by UC. It doesn't work like that. They only cover it all when 2 criteria is met. 1. The property is housing association or council and 2. The tenant doesn't work for any reason.
Sometimes they'll pay all the rent on private rented properties but only if they deem the rent amount to be no more than their LHA which Private rented properties never ever are and she doesn't work at all.
Otherwise if the rent is more than the LHA amount, they still wouldn't pay all her rent if she's private rented, only the LHA amount and again, that's only if she's not working. When you do work, even just part time but rent privately, then they'll only pay a contribution of the rent.

If she does live in a housing association or council property but she works, even just part time then again, they will only pay a contribution.

@kiana2015 Discretionary Housing Payment is only paid for 3 months at a time 🤨🫣

@Wavescrashingonthebeach You're projecting. Massively. I agree with your overall point about her DH's motives etc but you really are projecting and creating your own narrative.