Hairdressers. Why do you do it? Anyone else?

[theworriermum]

I don't know if it's all hairdressers or just my hair type (long, thick, coarse) but unless I'm absolutely prescriptive and borderline stern, they go to town.

Right now, I'm 4 months postpartum, heavier than I usually am and looking tired but my long brunette hair was my saving grace! I walked around with a birds nest in 4th Trimester to give it a break from heat. I straightened it before the cut for the first time and it was gorgeous and healthy. So long, long feathering across my jawline and neck.

I took my eye off the ball not saying 'trim only, no thinning, and please NO dramatic diagonal scissors for feathering'. I did say keep the length and that I liked the existing cut but it wasn't stern enough.

I couldn't see what she was doing at the back but it's clear to me now that she has thinned it without asking. A lot of them do this as I have thick hair but I hate it. At the front I asked for shorter parts to frame my face, which I already had but she has taken it way too far back, I look like a Shetland pony and the most infuriating part.... when she went to feather my hair, rather than trim the existing feathers she angled her scissors away from my face at a drastic angle and before I could say anything she slid them down. I asked her to stop but she said 'it's not even' and kept going, so now between the Shetland pony style side fringe, and OTT angle feathering, my actual hair only starts behind my shoulders. It's so ugly.

I'm devastated tbh. 2.5 weeks on and I still hate it. It's going to take months to grow this out. Last time this happened it took 10 months and I've been growing it and protecting it since.

Why? Why do you do it hairdressers? Anyone else?

I wouldn't mind the Edward scissors hands approach if they knew what they were doing. It's a shame the only person I trust to cut my hair is fully booked for weeks and I only know my window of free time a day or two before being mum of 2.

I had years of crying every time I came home from the hairdressers until I went to one and she said ‘always get a blow dry only first appointment to decide if you like the way your hairdresser works with your hair’ 11 years later I still go for one every week and she cuts and colours it perfectly and I finally love my hair. When I have ideas she will tell me ‘you won’t like it but if you’re sure’ and she’s always right - I only ever hate it then and she has to put it right about 2 weeks later. So many hairdressers seem to be unable to actually do anything that is a style rather than a trim.

I've not RTFT, but I think good hairdressers, who actually listen and can action what you want, but apply their own knowledge of hair, and your hair in particular, are few and far between.
I travel for an hour to get to my hairdresser, despite the fact that I moved away from the town she's in more than 15 years ago. She has always listened to what I want, given advice on my hair and how likely it is to work with that style etc and then given me a workable version of what I want! And she charges a fraction of some of the salons I've tried in our city, which have frankly been crap!

God I love my hairdresser! She’s been doing my hair for about ten years now. She knows it inside out and isn’t slow to tell me if I’m being unrealistic in terms of colour or cut. I have to book up two cuts in advance though (four months). Gone are the days when I could ring a couple of weeks before …

She also doesn’t chatter incessantly, ask me if I’m going out, or where I’m going on holiday. We have peaceful silence interspersed with interesting conversations.

I have been going to my hairdresser for over 15 years now. She has left her salon and has a few select clients at her house.
I hated the last hair cut, but told her and we talked through exactly what I wanted done this time and she did it! Tbf it's the first time in years I've had an issue with how she cut it.
I wouldn't trust anyone else now. I'd grow it and trim it myself were she to give up like I cut my daughters hair ( 21 and 18 and they get me to trim it every few months)

Hair is so defining, if it feels wrong you can feel dreadful

I agree. Scissor happy is what I used to call them (until I found a lovely lady who actually listens to me). Worst cut of my life was someone using a razor on my hair. I looked like I’d time-slipped from the 1970s with a Linda McCartney feather cut. I cried for days and bought hair bands and clips to try and disguise it.

At the front I asked for shorter parts to frame my face, which I already had but she has taken it way too far back, I look like a Shetland pony and the most infuriating part.... when she went to feather my hair, rather than trim the existing feathers she angled her scissors away from my face at a drastic angle and before I could say anything she slid them down. I asked her to stop but she said 'it's not even' and kept going, so now between the Shetland pony style side fringe, and OTT angle feathering, my actual hair only starts behind my shoulders. It's so ugly.

I have had this same thing so many times and it gives me the rage. I have the opposite to you, in that my hair is fine and slightly wavy, so prone to frizz and pinging up in all directions when it doesn't have enough weight to it. I end up with clumps of hair that hang unattractively either side of my head, too long to form a nice soft fringe, too bitty to blow dry into any decent shape, but too short to tuck behind my ears or pull back in a hair band. I feel like I must speak a different language to hairdressers sometimes.

Frankly I think you should tell them exactly what you've said on here and not go home and cry, And if you vote with your feet and don't tell them why then it will never get better

There ARE good hairdressers out there who listen and if they feel that what you want won't work they explain why. And if you still want it they'll do it with the 'on your head be it' (sorry), so don't complain after.

And if it will definitely ruin your hair then they won't.

Try and always find one that others have recommended or you've asked because their hair looks great

So why do you go to her? I dont get it. Find a hairdresser that does use scissors!!

I hear you . I have very very very thick hair down as far as my bra strap. Hairdressers are not allowed to put layers in full stop !!!!
When layers are in my hair, it actually separates and looks like i have two heads of hair, Been going to my current hairdresser for 15 years now, its a pain as she is about a 2 hour drive, but no one nearer to home has been able to cut it right for me. So now i rebook every 4 months with her and take to the day off work or make a day out of it when its a weekend. If she not able to do it they ring me to reschedule - i wont take anyone else and they know it. Its not cheap about 240e including the colour and it takes like 3 or 4 hours, she does think it out but that works for my hair , makes it easy to manage a bit and takes some weight off, i never leave unhappy. She no longer takes on any new clients now wither only works set days, a friend of mine was going to her but stopped and now she cant get back in with her. They are so hard to find but once you find them don't loose them

As a man I've had same in barbers and unisex hairdressers.

Ask them to use a No4 clipper around back of head and behind ears then scissor cut the rest and the muppet uses the clipper halfway up my scalp. Need three goes to get enough off the top.

Since the pandemic I do it myself with clippers. Much shorter than it used to be but I older and there's less coverage overall.

I'm in Swansea too and my hairdresser who I visit once a year cuts (trims) my hair exactly how I want it. Sometimes I decide that she can take a bit more off but she respects my wishes. I think if I said I wanted something different to my long, one length, greying hair she would come over all giddy and wet herself with excitement.

It was a hairdresser who wouldn't listen who made me decide not to bother with any more colours, highlights, blow dries - whatever. I was in my early 60s and was still dying my hair to conceal the grey. I used to have it dyed and then highlights on top - took ages!

I couldn't go to my usual hairdresser as she was on holiday, so I went to another one and explained VERY carefully and clearly that yes, I know that my original colour was a darkish brown, but my hair was only that colour at the back. On top it was grey and thinning. If if were dyed my original colour, not only would it have to be topped up every five minutes, but it makes it look even thinner on the top. She gave me some colours to choose from and I chose the lightest - she tried to persuade me, but I explained again.

I came out with hair the same colour it had been in my 20s - it looked lovely for literally a week. I was also charged an extra £15 for having it blow dried - which I had assumed would have been included in the price, which was a lot higher than I had been used to paying.

I decided that as I was early sixties, it was OK to have grey hair - men can do this and be called silver foxes, so I would too. I went cold turkey and just grew it out. I went to my original hairdresser and just had a dry cut - no layers (makes it look thinner). It looked bloody awful for 18 months but then, it looked OK.

Now I have a hairdresser come to my house to cut my hair - and my adult sons usually tag along too and have theirs cut (haha bank of Mum and saves them using up their Saturday morning). It is cheaper for me to have all three of us done than it used to be for me to have all that colouring etc. Life is so much simpler.

I say cut it all one length no layers etc

It's worked every time and the cut has been just that except once. I went back and got it changed

The thing is, you have to be alert as if your life is in danger and watch out like a hawk as soon as you walk in.
Then, after paying and saying your niceties, you might actually be reasonably satisfied with the result.
I have been trimming my hair at home, unfortunately due to my age hair is fine and thin
and I just need the qualified help now.
😐

I go to students. They're so careful and take their time and are totally supervised...they can't do anything that they want.

Plus it's half the price. Just takes a bit longer

When I last went to get my hair coloured, I'd grown out a ton of dark roots against my home-done brassy blonde and asked for lowlights and generally to blend the roots in a bit so the overall effect was brown with blonde ombre/grown out balayage.

She gave me a full head of highlights so bleached and ashy I looked like I had fully silver grey hair, then put a strange reddy brown colour over the root that now looks like a weird band of colour around my head as it's completely different to my natural hair colour.

I hate going too. But my hair is very thin and doesn't grow evenly, so I have to go or I look like a tramp! What I resent is having to pay the same full price for a cut that takes 5 minutes and a blow dry that is often just a quick waft.

I tried growing it long during lockdown, and it looks truly awful.

I resent going to the hairdresser as I end up paying about £50-60 for a trim basically (I’m very low maintenance as far as hair goes).

I have to sit through a blow dry because it’s mandatory for some reason. Usually they try to iron my hair with those straightening tongs but I tell them not to bother.

None have every mucked up the cut thankfully though I remember one girl who cut my hair at the top and side but left the back because I mentioned I was growing it and she thought I would want to “keep the length”. I had to carefully explain it was not the early 90s anymore and i did not want a mullet.

I fucking hate it. I cut and dye my own these days. At least it saves me having to answer a load of questions about my life, put up with someone scratcing my head with a 'massage' and sending me out looking like a pineapple.

I've been going to the same small hairdresser for over 40 years and have never ended up with a result I wasn't happy with. I still don't understand why people pay up when someone does their hair in a way they don't like.

You need to go to a good stylist who has had proper training in a good teaching salon. Not someone who has done a short hairdressing course.

My Hairdresser is absolutely amazing but he trained in one of the big west end salons and has been working for 30 years.

a good hairdresser can also blowdry and couldn’t need to go anywhere near straighteners. You can tell if you’re getting a good blowdry within 5 seconds of them starting. If they’re tickling your head you can guarantee it will be rubbish. If they have their big round brush, pulling hard and look like they’re having an arm workout you’re on to a winner.

look for salons which deal with Greek / Indian / Middle Eastern hair. They’re always do the best blowdry as they are often dealing with thick frizzy hair that has a mind of its own

Basic dry cut for me at an 'old school' place that doesn't really cater for people wanting modern techniques. It's not the full on glam experience but I get the cut I want at a decent price.

In my 40 odd years with my hairdresser I've been through several house moves. When I began I lived on the same street. I live 12 miles away now. Wouldn't dream of moving unless she retires.

My hairdresser is absolutely great. She has never given me a bad haircut - she's very collaborative and also honest about what will work and what won't. She is fast and I don't pay more than £70 for cut & full head of highlights, and she'll dry and curl my hair just for the fun of it. £12 for a trim! I'll never go anywhere else now. She's completely healed me from bad hairdressers. Good hairdressers do exist!

I pay £110 for a curly cut now as apparently standard hairdressers can't cut curly hair or style it (I need gel, and lots of it!)
It's the only time I've come out and not immediately tied it up