To feel mortified I was settled out of my job?

[SackedandDisgraced]

NC’d as I am legally prohibited from speaking to anyone about this IRL.

I have been in my role for 8 years. Last 4 years I was SLT in a very large company. It was a very public facing role so lots of presence on social media and tv. New CEO came onboard early 2024 and took an instant dislike to me. She made my life a literal hell. I pushed through it and dusted myself off so many times but it just wore me down and in the end I just couldn’t cope and ended up being signed off for 6 weeks.

The day I came back to work I was brought into a meeting with CEO and offered a protected conversation and a settlement. Basically said if I didn’t take the settlement I’d be placed on performance improvement (despite my performance being exemplary for 8 years) and made it clear she didn’t want me there.

my mental health was at an all time low when I was offered money to cut and run, which I took but now regret.

I had to clear my desk in the evening when nobody was around so never got to say goodbye but the rumours started circulating and people speculated I’d been sacked. I just feel so mortified. Business announced I’d left a week later with a pitiful thank you for my contribution. This was a public announcement because of what I do so it’s out there in the masses and I’ve been bombarded with questions and all I feel is complete shame.

can’t speak the truth to anyone IRL as I’m bound by the settlement but just feel so low. As if that wasn’t bad enough I am struggling to find another job that pays anywhere near what I was earning with the flexibility I had.

any words of wisdom?

Please don't take this personally. It may not feel like it but leaving with a settlement is definitely better than a long drawn out PIP.

Can you do anything retrospectively like a tribunal etc? I think ultimately you did the right thing - she was clearly feeling threatened by you. Keep going with the job hunt you'll get there.

NC’d as I am legally prohibited from speaking to anyone about this IRL.

But you're allowed to post about it on a social media site?

No I can’t take any legal action as I signed away my rights. People who I thought were my proper work friends haven’t really been in touch, I think they feel awkward and I’m just hiding away which makes me look guilty!

Well there’s not enough detail for this to be breaking the rules is there? Eg company or employee name or position etc? Could be anyone!

yes because it’s anonymous and not identifiable

Don't be that person SoupDragon

How much was the settlement in terms of years of salary?

Don't take it to heart. They have probably quite forcefully been told they are not allowed to contact you.

I ended up with 6 months salary. My solicitor advising said to fight back but I was just too broken and needed it to be over with. I am so resentful of the decision I made, it was foolish and I know I own that. I’ve only got a few months left of salary and then I really need to find another job but it is so hard and I feel my confidence has been shattered.

Premier league football managers are publicly sacked all the time - they never seem that bothered and often move on to bigger and better. Chin up lovely!

She's hardly exposing her identity, go on another thread if you aren't going to be helpful.

You poor love. I can imagine you feel every sort of emotion.

FWIW I think you did the right thing. The easy thing would be to have stayed. Fought it out. Dragged yourself through it. In a years time you’d be on the same place minus the settlement. Your mental health would likely be almost unrecoverable and your sick record shit.

you’ve made a short term decision for your own wellbeing. You will get another job - it’s a very tough market and you may need to make 100 applications. I’m on my 8th or 9th I think. You will get through this.

When you feel able, reach out to a former work friend - if you want to - and touch base. It will be okay. Xx

My workplace has 'disappeared' a number of colleagues in recent months, they go off sick at short notice and then an email goes round saying they have 'gone travelling' or are spending time with family.

It's a shit way to treat people. Previously if someone was no longer a good fit they were managed out with dignity and had their contribution recognised & be able to say goodbye. It is a worrying and unpleasant trend to see emerge at my workplace.

It just looks bad on the company. The shame is not yours.

@SackedandDisgraced even your username is sad, you are not disgraced. It sounds like she was really threatened by you for some reason, it happens. Can you use some of your settlement to pay for an agency to support you to pay for a job or some career coaching to help get your confidence back again?

This is awfully sad to read. I hope you can find a role to build your confidence again.

I’d be all over LinkedIn getting in touch with everyone! Why not organise drinks with all your favouriteformer colleagues? Hiding won’t help and believe me, people are probably quite well aware you had a run in with the CEO and if you think you’re disgraced, then you want to be guessing what people are saying behind the CEO’s back!

You made the decision to protect your own health and wellbeing and that is always a wise choice.

Can you talk to an executive coach or similar to get validation from someone whose professional opinion you trust and to try to reframe the period in your own mind?

I’ve paid for my CV to be rewritten and have got some really good agency contacts but I’m just falling to pieces in the interview process when I’m being asked why I left my old company. I know I need to get a grip of myself but honestly easier said than done.

Thank you for the wonderfully supportive comments, makes me feel like a little less of a complete loser.

still can’t believe I’ve been sacked. Think it’s a generational thing where a sacking feels totally shameful.

I’ve avoided ex colleagues because I’m scared of what they’ll say, I already know the rumour mill has been swirling and I’m just not strong enough to hear the lies. I’ve always got along with everything and prided myself on my work ethic and integrity.

I’ve been in the workplace a long time.

I’ve been up. I’ve been down. But somehow the world keeps turning and people still want me to contribute something, even if it’s not quite what I’d like to be doing in an ideal world.

It’s all very dependent on the individual workplace. In one place you can be a star. In another, the fit just isn’t right.

Try reaching out to some industry connections and setting up some coffees?

I was recently "made redundant" but was offered a settlement agreement and approx 6 months pay. I was told to leave immediately on garden leave but was also told that it was nothing to do with my performance.

My biggest upset was people I thought I was close too (professionally) didn't even get in touch to simply say goodbye.

I'm currently job hunting and also going to have some counselling to help me process everything

DH was bullied at work by a new CEO, with my support he approached an employment lawyer and started a grievance, The investigation found in his favour, he just wanted to keep doing the job he loved. Essentially he was forced to leave with a large payout. He was asked (forced) to sign an NDA.
I told everyone about it, I even told his story on a radio phone in about bullying in the workplace.
My point is OP, that even if you won, you would probably have had to leave anyway.

So sorry you have been treated so poorly. You clearly did not deserve that kind of exit. It just leaves such a bitter taste in the mouth.

I think counselling is a good idea and I probably ought to seek some help myself.

I think people feel almost scared to reach out, I really do feel so tainted. Sorry you are going through something so similar.

I agree with @ronswansonstache , the shame isn't yours and you've been treated very badly.
FWIW I think that accepting was the best option, though it doesn't feel that way right now. If you'd stayed they would have treated you even more cruelly, for longer, and your mental health and confidence would have been destroyed.

Wrt interviews- tell them it was a conscious decision to leave and remember all the awesome things you accomplished and write these all down ready to share at an interview

I honesty believe i was let go due to me challenging the failures of the company and some of the decision making- although it was always in the interest of making things better. The company was losing sales and being in a training role I saw the issues that was causing this and was honestly trying to help and make things better but I think when a company and SLT are under pressure they will take anyone out, just so they can protect themselves. I regret the hours and hours I put into the job spending precious time away from my home and family and all the extra time and effort I put in, just to be cast aside so easily. I certainly have learned the hard way!

You were treated very poorly. Maybe the person who engineered your departure was threatened by your good work ethic and talent. You have nothing to be ashamed of at all and made the right decision to take the settlement and preserve your MH.