Worst thing your in-laws have ever said or done to you?

[Springsunshine123]

Whats the worst thing your in-laws have ever said/done to you? Long list of mine include:
MIL telling me on our wedding day “Did not expect this to be this nice from you”
MIL asking me how much my jacket was and when replying £50 she said (god are you sure, wouldn’t expect you to fork out that much!)
trying to feed my 9mo lucozade
wanting someone to blow smoke into my 7yo’s ear to cure his earache
telling me it was my fault her husband was coughing…. The list of gems is endless…GO!

As bad as my FIL and MIL are, my oldest SIL takes the cake. For years, she was nice to my face and saying really awful things behind my back. She claimed I married my DH for his money. When we married, he didn’t have any. His job wasn’t great, he was in college part time and his car was a beater. I had graduated, owned a home and had a nice car. I put my DH through college.

Her mask started to slip a few years into my marriage, when we started having kids. She started telling everyone that I was neglecting and abusing our children. She lived a five days drive from us, had never been to our home and had never even met some of our children. The others, she had seen for a couple of brief visits (less than an hour) at family gatherings, when they were babies and toddlers. We barely had any contact with her because she is an alcoholic, drug addict and was living with a convict pedophile. When other relatives told my DH what she was saying, he called her and told her to stop. She refused and threatened to assault me, so we cut her off.

After my FIL passed away, my DH was the beneficiary for some investments. They were sold by stepMIL and SIL convinced her that she had made up with us and would send us the money. StepMIL isn’t very savvy and gave her my DH’s share. She never sent him anything. We decided not to pursue it because it would bring too much drama and the potential for her to get violent is too high.

Unfortunately, most of my in-laws are quite toxic. They are quick to call me a gold digger. I had graduated from college and bought a home that was mostly paid off before my DH and I married. I helped him finish college and pay off his debts. While I was a SAHM, I started my own company and worked at it from home. Now that our DC are older, my company is successfully supporting our family and my DH works for me.

UIL said I cause my oldest child to get type 1 diabetes because we lived in a certain big city. He said that God was punishing us for not moving to the small town in the middle of nowhere where the in-laws live. Most of the in-laws have either type 1 or type 2 diabetes.

UIL’s oldest son would hit on me at family gatherings anytime my DH was out of earshot. Of course I always told my DH and CIL would say he was kidding, but would do it again at the next opportunity.

where do I start….
told me she hoped I’d never be able to have kids. On our wedding day.
when I had a miscarriage, told me it must be something wrong with me because nobody in her family had had a miscarriage
And after a long Labour and an emergency section, her first words to me an hour after being patched up was that I looked rough.

my 1 husband was alone a nasty violent bully but his family were worse they did all they could to split us up and also to do all they could to tempt him away from me and my kids with drink. he was a chronic alcoholic died at less that 60 from that and they were all the same they were always getting him to leave me and go on week long benders. i never knew where he was or when he was going to go. sometimes he was going up town shopping etc and just went. once he took the electric bill money to pay it and I did not see him for 2 weeks.
his sister the day after our wedding day tempting him over to go drinking they all lived about 15 miles away and he woke up next to an ex gf. the sil was implicated in this getting him drunk and encouraging her to sleep with him he was never faithful my 5 year old at the time was given crisps to sit in the beer garden be quiet while he had sex with a barmaid in front of her i did not know where him or the kids were same as the one day i had someone land on my doorstep to tell me my kids were sat on a doorstep of a pub in town.
worse was his mother when my darling mother died, we had a very bad time with mum having ovarian cancer she died at only 61, we did all we could to help her at home but she was so ill and her pain would not be controlled at home she was taken into a local cottage hospital. for 3 weeks i spent my time going between there and my kids at home. at first my husband was marvellous and supportive amazingly especially as at the time I was trying to help dad who was totally devastated of course
after a few weeks it came to it that mum was at the end of her life we did not want her dying alone i really honestly did not think i could cope with it nor my sister so my ex said he would do it sit with her through the night.
to help me he said he would get his mum to come and stay with me at 4 in the morning my bil came to the house to tell me mum had gone. upset he gave me a hug before leaving.
when my ex got home he told her me and bil had been groping and snoggin each other. ex was so paranoid he believed it.
during the day we had to cope with telling my young children etc then it got to mid afternoon and mil started. she said are we not having any meals today? i apologised and said sorry its been a very full on day including a visit to see dad to comfort him
her reply was well fuck the dead think of the fucking living
she then stormed out the house with ex in tow getting drunk at the local pub. getting back ex crashed out in bed dropping a cig into a bin causing a fire which thankfully i stopped in time then i asked ex how was i going to go to where dad was as we had a chance to see mum that evening in the chapel of rest so was desperate to go
stupidly i know please no comments on this i let my ex drive us to dads he was still over but was bit more sober anyway a mile from dads he crashed car into a bank grass type her and ex got a lift from someone going by then they went on train to her place
meanwhile i was stranded mile from the town kids of 6 and 7 on a dark country road i ended up staggering with carrying the kids all the way to dads 2 miles no way could i take them to the chapel of rest but by time i had managed to get there it was too late
dad was in pieces so could not get us home but luckily a friend of his who was with dad did get us home ex came home just in time for funeral
she was a vicious nasty bitch and i hate them all

Mine take money off my husband at any opportunity (they consider him ‘rich and successful’ so fair game) and never bother with our children (again because they consider my husband to be successful). Not sure why my husband’s success means they don’t need to bother with their GC? On the otherhand they pander to their ‘less successful’ daughter and her children. Their other GC are much more deserving of their love and attention apparently.

I am done with them.

Interesting how many mils like to say their sons are doing lots and woman is lazy.

I wonder if this will change with more than equal roles?

Some nasty stuff here.

@DeedlessIndeed no that's pretty awful in many many ways I'd be very careful leaving her alone with dc

My mother-in-law is generally fine but as she is getting older she is doing more and more weird and sometimes nasty things (not just to us).

The worst to me was when my husband was rushed to hospital with sepsis (didn't know it was that at the time) and I was 3 hours away with work so she accompanied him. When I called and said I was nearly there, she said oh he's a lot more settled now and is sleeping so leave it for a little bit, head home and check in with DS (my parents had him) and I'll let you know when to come up. Now he's recovered she has said that the consultant had said that those few hours were critical and the consultant kept asking where I was. I've never mentioned it to DH that she sent me home as he would go nuclear but I'll never forgive her for that.

DH also had a bit of a revelation at Christmas that she is actually quite toxic, he's read up and watched a lot of online videos etc. about it. Her automatic reaction to things we have done or want to do is always from a place of negativity whereas my family give absolute relentless support, which makes her look even worse. My husband is getting his first ever brand new premium brand car this week for example, and is very excited, but hasn't even told her because she will just bring him down and will ask lots of inappropriate questions about finances etc. which are of no concern to her. I will bet in the next month or so she will start asking for help to look for a new car for herself too as she will be jealous of him. This is exactly what she has done repeatedly in the past too and we have only managed to see this pattern when chatting things over recently.

His dad died very suddenly when he was only 37 years old and left him a little bit of money. He used that money to start his own small business. When he sold the initial van to trade up to a better one, she went on and on about it so much that it was the money from his dad that helped him start his business and he'd be nowhere without "them" that she guilted him into giving her the money that his dad left him. Absolutely disgraceful as she was left A LOT of cash when he died and gets a very healthy pension too. Heartbreaking.

We get ours mail order from Lourdes! You can get from other places too.

Dear mumsnet HQ we need a shocked face and massive eyeroll emoji for posts like this!
This is my clear winner. Not that it's an enviable position. I feel so sad for Red0 that she and her DC had to experience that.
Some of these women are just batshit crazy.
Noticed a poster above complaining about being nasty about MiLs. By God some of them deserve the NC Imposed by families. I'm a MiL and I learned how not to behave by my own (long deceased) MiL who was vile but tame by some of posted examples!

Nothing! They are so nice and I love spending time in their company.

Fil once called me by dh's ex wife's name but pretended he hadn't. We all had a laugh about that

Thank you @Sunburstclocklover yes, she’s a rotten old boot. I could write a book on all the sometimes thoughtless, but usually just horrible things she’s said and done over the years. Thankfully we don’t have anything to do with her anymore.

Im just sad that we’ve all been cursed with such terrible inlaws!

Ah! That makes sense! I was thinking you had some epic spidey sense to be able to tell from looking at the syringe! But I guess you did have epic spidey sense to know to go and check!

They’re so awful. Nothing is ever good enough for them or their darling son! It’s a shame because I’d like a good relationship with her but she cuts herself out by being mean.

Constantly harped on about how I was a wonderful partner and how I made her son happy . Then I found out she’d been surreptitiously facilitating situations where his ex would be there and I wouldn’t .
was extremely friendly with his ex seeing her every week (which normally is not a problem) but did her utmost to keep me a secret and make out that her son was alone pining over her .
telling his ex that he was just in a strop and she’d get them back together!

MIL called me lazy to my face because DC weren't potty trained by 3. They both have SEN.

When I told
MIL that her precious child was an abuser she asked

"Well, what do you do to him?"

More like you should be saying to
Mil "what did you do to him!"

I’ve just commented on another thread which reminded me of another gem from the MIL

DD was 5lb 6oz at birth - no reason she was small, but no concern. MIL decided that’s because I must’ve smoked throughout the pregnancy, as though there were no other reason for a baby to be small. She told a lot of her family the same thing. I’ve never smoked, never mind while pregnant. She proudly tells how her own DD had all 10 lb + babies though, as if that means that she looked after hers better whilst pregnant.

They may well have had gestational diabetes. A maternity related health condition and cause for sympathy rather than bragging!

They didn’t, they were all perfectly fine. It was more “Oh our Caroline always had lovely big healthy babies! 10lb-ers they were!” Then looks down on and makes snide comments/presumptions about smaller babies (the mothers)

I've told this on here before but MIL (before we were married) told me how glad she was that neither me or SIL are black. We were just having a normal conversation and she dropped that in.

Like others she also referred to herself as mum when DC1 was born. Dc even got a birthday card signed "mum" from here.

I've also had her take DC out of my arms to comfort them when they were crying.

Batshit

When we finally had our baby following years of loss and trying fil said I could stop being so reserved around them now I was a productive family member. That amongst so many toxic comments and behaviour.

Could write a book, but they are not worth the headspace