Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to request a “gift” back?

229 replies

requestingagiftback · 31/01/2025 17:04

I met another mum at a soft play and we hit it off, following week we had a playdate at mine.
My daughter is same reception year however DD is very tall for her age so is in next size up, her DD is very small so next size down.
I had a large bag of clothes (dresses, leggings, tops etc) I was going to sell but in the spirit of extending the arm of friendship I offered her the bag which she gratefully accepted as I believe her finances differ to ours (I mean we’re not rich by any means and the money could of helped but she is a single mom and maybe i’m a sucker 🤷🏻‍♀️)

The playdate seemed to go well and we talked about setting up another one when she left.
However the next morning she text me to say that while she really liked me and blah blah blah lots of nice qualities, there was a part of the day she has decided was a deal breaker for her due to her own personal experiences and did not want to progress the relationship any further.
I accept that as I adamantly don't want to force myself upon anyone or press a boundary. I won’t discuss this here as that isn’t the point nor does it matter.

What I do want advice on is, is it acceptable for me to text her and say that I’d like the clothes back as tbh it feels like if I’m not good enough then neither should my stuff be?!? I can’t decide if maybe im just being/coming across a bit petty and am all up in my head over it?!?

so….

AIBU:

Yes: Tough tiddies, I gave them, too late now.

No: Sending a message asking for them back, whilst odd, is not unreasonable.

OP posts:
Threecraws · 01/02/2025 08:22

NotTerfNorCis · 31/01/2025 21:44

That was my thought, too. Or something similar.

But you don't accept a big(gish) gift from someone and then tell them you don't want to be friends with them. That's rude and weird. She should have given the clothes back.

I wouldn't consider a bag of unwanted clothes a biggish gift. The recipient might have thought she was doing the op a favour by getting rid of them for her.

Christmassoxs · 01/02/2025 11:09

JollyViper · 01/02/2025 01:04

@requestingagiftback you can ask for your thread to be deleted if you report it, look below the op box and you should see the option of 'report'

Oh ffs on what grounds? Because OP is sulking with responses given ?
Sorry PPs you might have wasted your time AGAIN on advising / responding and trying to help.

JollyViper · 01/02/2025 11:12

Christmassoxs · 01/02/2025 11:09

Oh ffs on what grounds? Because OP is sulking with responses given ?
Sorry PPs you might have wasted your time AGAIN on advising / responding and trying to help.

Because sat 17.59 op wrote
I can’t seem to delete the post but hopefully people can respect what I’ve said

Windsorlady · 19/02/2025 11:39

Maybe she feels embarrested for accepting the bag of clothes..she may have v.little money and plans on selling some of the clothes and thinks you may ask why u havnt seen them..dont ask for the clothes back ..just be kind xxxx

New posts on this thread. Refresh page