To not be fussed about shaven legs and swimming

[ArchesOfWisteria]

In my mid 40s I have lost the urge to remove body hair much, particularly in winter. If anything I find it’s better for my skin, no rashes or bumps under my arms, less sweating under my arms. Easier with sensitive skin.

I kind of presumed that no one cares that much- I certainly don’t care if other people have a preference to wax completely or not shave at all.

I went swimming with an acquaintance and she seemed shocked, a bit horrified even, at my legs. I stated I am comfortable, made a light joke my husband is supportive. But she brought it up again like it’s a big deal. ‘Especially as you are so fair skinned with black hair’ was her last comment (I am, not particularly super hair, average but with black hair).

Are other women actually bothered about shaving when it comes to others? Do you notice? I don’t in the pool! Obviously we all have our personal preferences for our own bodies, but does this for extend to being in anyway affronted by what another woman does. She stated hers is the typical view, but I may have more ‘European’ standards.

For context, if anyone askes, I’m quite average in most ways. Healthy weight, clean hair and clothing etc.

yanbu- I’m not really that bothered about what others do, as long as I can exercise my own personal freedom without comment

yabu- I think it’s a bit yucky on others and I do judge natural body hair in the pool

I don't wear make up or high heels and I don't carry a handbag. I also only shave my legs in summer. So I'm obviously a man. Thanks for letting me know.

Should everyone shave their heads before swimming if this is the case? 😂

I've not shaved leg hair for years (okay I am 64). It's never been particularly noticeable unlike my arm hair but I rarely shave that either.

I think we spend too much time pandering to the patriarchy's idea of what a woman should be.

You are Duncan Goodhew and I claim my £5.

Why? Can you explain what business it is of yours.

Personally I can’t be bothered to be offended by whether someone who is not related to me shaves or not.

I do hope you wouldn’t be too upset if told to fuck off with your opinion and I would drop you like a stone. I certainly hope you are perfect in every way to judge friends to that extent.

No problem whatsoever, I don't understand why women are pressured to be clean of body hair all over.
Natural is best and if your happy then its a plus?

I take my daughter swimming every week and I do not shave for it. If I am hairy I’m hairy. If I happened to have shaved great! My hair is so dark and grows back quickly. If I shave too regularly it causes ingrown hairs and issues so I don’t bother.

I can see the confusion, looking at the picture, as it looks like a wet razor attachment. As you used it in the shower, I am guessing you didn't switch it on. If it's an electric attachment, it's designed to be used dry with battery power. It won't do anything if you use it like a wet razor, you need to use it like an electric shaver.

I go swimming every day and I keep everything shaved all the time, I wouldn’t really notice though if I saw a woman with hairy legs and arm pits. That’s not because I’m a nice un judgey person either because I notice other things and think yuk 😄

Why would you be bothered if someone related to you shaves. Why would you care

You can bet your life men aren’t having these conversations about their peers.

Your body your choice! The extreme expectations placed on women, and policed by women, are the reason women’s lives and appearance are deemed public property — which they are not.

You don’t need to groom, dress or smile for anyone else.

I have a friend who waxes her big toes 😂

I haven't shaved my legs since I was about 12! I did it a few times, then I thought, this is stupid, boys get to have leg hair, and I got myself out of it.

A few years ago, I started getting a lot more chin hairs, which I do remove, and along that came the fact that the leg hair on the top of my legs grew in resemblance closer to my pubic hair than to hair elsewhere on the leg (which in turn lengthened rather, it grows to over 3cm in parts.) I sometimes trim that (with nail scissors).

I think bald legs and bald armpits look odd! That's not really an option in your options ;) we can only be sensible and shrug our shoulders at others or we can judge in the way your friend does about naturally growing hair.

But it isn't something I notice around the pool as much, more just out and about in summer. I do see women with body hair in the showers (mostly open plan changing area, some women who shower naked in it.)

I'm late 40s and swim 3x weekly, leg hair or not. I wax, so there's always a yucky phase where you have to let the hairs grow out first. People might judge in their heads, but never say anything. That would be rude.

I love this thread! Go you and thanks for empowering other women to love their bodies 👏

Went swimming with my wonderful friend who had finished chemo and battled breast cancer... in the changing room she said "look, even got my bush back!" and I suddenly stopped caring about removing body hair. Her furry legs were a beautiful sign of health and wellness.
I've not waxed since.

I don’t care if they do. I also would not say anything to anyone about their preference as it’s none of my business nor concern.

Having a hairy big toe is normal.
I used to think I was a freak for having hairs on my toes, and that there was something wrong with me.
The problem was with society, not my hairy toes.

She's just jealous of your confidence. Otherwise why would she bring it up it's just rude. She wants to pull you back into the patriarchal rat race she calls home

I know it’s normal. That’s why it’s funny she waxes it.

I really like my soft, fluffy armpits. much nicer than when they were sharp and stubbly. and as you said, it really helps control sweat and stinkiness.

my mum said that was the first hair to fall out, and it looked really weird.
took longer than head hair to grow back, too.

I wouldn't be bothered by leg hair and do go swimming without shaving. Underarm hair is another matter and would shave that.

Do you know why, or is it just habit?

Love STP. Brilliant writers and actors