Page 8 | Not to like being called posh?

JoyousGreyOrca · 26/01/2025 00:10

There are threads fairly often ins tyle and beauty asking how to look posh on a budget

username299 · 26/01/2025 00:13

The only person who's called me posh is someone who belches really loudly in public.

DisabledDemon · 26/01/2025 00:15

I'm perfectly happy to be called posh.

Lovelybitofsquirrel3 · 26/01/2025 00:16

I don’t have a regional accent so people often ask me where I’m from and assume I am well off. I’ve moved about a lot so don’t really have a “from”. I am far from posh

LBFseBrom · 26/01/2025 00:52

Stillwearinggloves · 24/01/2025 14:21

What point is a person trying to make by saying someone else is posh? This comment has been made to me or about me a few times recently by so-called friends. AIBU to think it’s rude and not to like being singled out in this way?

I've had that too in the past, not so much now I'm old. I was never in the least posh, came from a working class background but I received a decent education and spoke quite well, that's all. However I didn't sound like Helena Bonham Carter or the royals. It's all relative.

Just ignore them, they are being stupid - and probably defensive.

booboo24 · 26/01/2025 02:21

It doesn't bother me at all, I live in a 'posh' area so it's always said to me when I'm asked where I'm from from, I reply and they say 'oh posh then' I cringe when they then ask what I do for a living and where, as it's the epitome of posh! My bosses ARE posh, by every measure possible but actually they're so down to earth. People don't see that until they get to know them - the look on contractors faces when they drop a 'fuck' in to every sentence is hilarious.
I however am NOT posh! I've been bought up to speak clearly and the accent here is considered such, but that's where it ends! I don't find it offensive, I get bored of the 'joke' though.....I think I'd be more offended if I was called common!!!!

OP start referring to yourself as posh, play into it a bit and see if that bores them?

Bankin · 26/01/2025 08:26

booboo24 · 26/01/2025 02:21

It doesn't bother me at all, I live in a 'posh' area so it's always said to me when I'm asked where I'm from from, I reply and they say 'oh posh then' I cringe when they then ask what I do for a living and where, as it's the epitome of posh! My bosses ARE posh, by every measure possible but actually they're so down to earth. People don't see that until they get to know them - the look on contractors faces when they drop a 'fuck' in to every sentence is hilarious.
I however am NOT posh! I've been bought up to speak clearly and the accent here is considered such, but that's where it ends! I don't find it offensive, I get bored of the 'joke' though.....I think I'd be more offended if I was called common!!!!

OP start referring to yourself as posh, play into it a bit and see if that bores them?

I love winding the husband up about being "posh" because he grew up in a town ten miles away from my town known for being posh lol. It depends whether it's said in jest or spite.

RosesAndHellebores · 26/01/2025 08:32

Both my DC try hard not to be posh. Both have been known as posh - DS's former colleagues used to call him "posh boy". They have just eye-rolled and laughed along.

Shinyandnew1 · 26/01/2025 09:43

One person said it by reference to an activity I did a long time ago.

It depends-it a person said, 'So, did you know X did fencing/skiing at school' and someone replied, 'wow-that's a bit posh, we just did netball!' then I couldn't really get worked up about it. What are they actually referring to?

HawkinsTigers · 26/01/2025 11:07

Kitchensinktoday · 25/01/2025 23:12

It’s generally a sneering example of inverted snobbery.

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I really don’t think it is, unless there’s a whole back story here.

RealHousewivesOfTaunton · 26/01/2025 17:40

YANBU. I'm not posh, just have a standard South-Eastern accent. It gets very tiresome being called posh, especially with the presumption that I'm a bit up myself.

Kitchensinktoday · 26/01/2025 20:03

RealHousewivesOfTaunton · 26/01/2025 17:40

YANBU. I'm not posh, just have a standard South-Eastern accent. It gets very tiresome being called posh, especially with the presumption that I'm a bit up myself.

This. I’m not quite sure how I ended up being fairly well spoken, coming from a “middle of the road” background, but when it’s commented on, it’s assumed I must look down on other people, which is unfair. As I’ve got older I’ve made a point of finding kinder people, but in my younger years I found people could be quite judgmental

Original poster

Stillwearinggloves · 26/01/2025 20:54

Kitchensinktoday · 26/01/2025 20:03

This. I’m not quite sure how I ended up being fairly well spoken, coming from a “middle of the road” background, but when it’s commented on, it’s assumed I must look down on other people, which is unfair. As I’ve got older I’ve made a point of finding kinder people, but in my younger years I found people could be quite judgmental

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This is how I’m thinking!

OP posts:

Original poster

Stillwearinggloves · 26/01/2025 20:57

Shinyandnew1 · 26/01/2025 09:43

One person said it by reference to an activity I did a long time ago.

It depends-it a person said, 'So, did you know X did fencing/skiing at school' and someone replied, 'wow-that's a bit posh, we just did netball!' then I couldn't really get worked up about it. What are they actually referring to?

The activity was something similar to darts, but not darts. However, it’s not really this particular comment that’s got me thinking. It’s all the recent comments together.

OP posts:

Original poster

Stillwearinggloves · 26/01/2025 21:00

Person1234 · 25/01/2025 22:14

It's not a compliment, but generally I think that if you are indeed posh, you should take it on the chin.

I think a lot of posh people don't like being called posh, and would prefer to go back to the old days when people respected them instead of resenting them. Times have changed!

But if you're not actually posh, it would def be annoying.

I have no wish to be respected except in the same way that anyone else would be.

OP posts:

Briannaco · 26/01/2025 21:13

I think if you don't want to be called "posh" don't live in a class based country, where there has been such unfairness.

"Posh" is a loaded word. People say it out of hurt.

Rich families kept themselves rich through intergenerational wealth.

So when some one was brought up in a poor struggling household , and they hear Cosmo at work - going on about his third skiing holiday, they may call him posh.

It's not just about Cosmo. It is hurt and pain- at the unfairness of the system

Briannaco · 26/01/2025 21:16

Posh people don't annoy me per se.

What does annoy me is when some rich, posh people complain about things that other people don't even have. It's heartless .

For example I used to attend a group. The richest man in the group used to complain about his summer house. Something minor was wrong with it, so he was going to have to spend his summer holiday in his flat in Spain instead.

OK, maybe have a quick complain. But he went on and on and on about it.

I was thinking "I know there are a couple of people in this group who are struggling for money. "

His showing off was just tasteless.

Maggiethecat · 26/01/2025 21:26

Briannaco · 26/01/2025 21:13

I think if you don't want to be called "posh" don't live in a class based country, where there has been such unfairness.

"Posh" is a loaded word. People say it out of hurt.

Rich families kept themselves rich through intergenerational wealth.

So when some one was brought up in a poor struggling household , and they hear Cosmo at work - going on about his third skiing holiday, they may call him posh.

It's not just about Cosmo. It is hurt and pain- at the unfairness of the system

Edited

What does this have to do with people making presumptions about people because of their accent, hobbies etc?

Context of the remark is important but no doubt the label is often used to suggest the posh person is pretentious.

Fillmeinfan · 26/01/2025 21:33

Yes I have had this in the past. It's a backhanded compliment. 'Just because you are posh it doesn't mean you are bright' type of comments. They are tedious. 'Well some of us have had it easy.' What are you basing that on - my posh surname? Life hasn't been easy, regardless. I wouldn't comment on someone else's accent and make assumptions in the same way, op i also find it offensive. When I got married I took my husband's - normal - surname and haven't had this nonsense since in the same way.

Briannaco · 26/01/2025 21:51

Maggiethecat · 26/01/2025 21:26

What does this have to do with people making presumptions about people because of their accent, hobbies etc?

Context of the remark is important but no doubt the label is often used to suggest the posh person is pretentious.

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Hobbies are a good indicator of if someone is posh.

Posh people ski, for example. Or play polo.

It's not a hobby. It's a way to fit in with the posh set.

So yes your hobbies can make you be called posh

Maggiethecat · 26/01/2025 22:23

Briannaco · 26/01/2025 21:51

Hobbies are a good indicator of if someone is posh.

Posh people ski, for example. Or play polo.

It's not a hobby. It's a way to fit in with the posh set.

So yes your hobbies can make you be called posh

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So someone who skis does it to fit in with the posh set? They’re pretentious?

I know ordinary middle class people who ski because they are sporty and enjoy it. Clearly you’re unlikely to ski if financially stretched but are you posh if you do?

With views such as yours I understand why the OP is offended at being called posh.

Briannaco · 26/01/2025 22:26

Maggiethecat · 26/01/2025 22:23

So someone who skis does it to fit in with the posh set? They’re pretentious?

I know ordinary middle class people who ski because they are sporty and enjoy it. Clearly you’re unlikely to ski if financially stretched but are you posh if you do?

With views such as yours I understand why the OP is offended at being called posh.

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Do you know ordinary middle class people who pay polo?

Yes hobbies are much more - than just hobbies! We all know that. They are for social standing.

I know one very posh woman. She says herself that she's posh. She doesn't mind being called posh because she knows that she is

She told me that polo matches are much more about being seen with the "right set" , than it is about the sport

Maggiethecat · 26/01/2025 22:59

Why are you singling out polo, a very elite and expensive activity, as if to prove your point? Did the OP say she played polo?

I can’t say that I know anyone who engages in a hobby to improve their social standing but maybe I need to get out more!

Briannaco · 26/01/2025 23:01

Maggiethecat · 26/01/2025 22:59

Why are you singling out polo, a very elite and expensive activity, as if to prove your point? Did the OP say she played polo?

I can’t say that I know anyone who engages in a hobby to improve their social standing but maybe I need to get out more!

Why so defensive?

Maggiethecat · 26/01/2025 23:04

Go ahead, call me posh if you want to indulge yourself!