To think we're going to have a generation of adults unable to socialise?

[Ezlo]

By that I mean in restaurants. I see so many kids glued to their iPods in restaurants, barely uttering a word to the rest of their family. The future unsettles me.

We have never sat and read whilst in a restaurant/cafe with our kids and I have never seen other people doing that either. I would say parents who sit and read and ignore their kid whilst eating out are pretty rude and shit parents too.

Yes. You're correct OP

lol, I remember a friend of mine going in to buy cigarettes for someone underage and the lady behind the counter grilling her massively - she clearly knew what was happening and was trying to catch her out

Yes and no, We have young kids but no devices are allowed at the table, no phones etc.

We went out last week for a birthday, we kids played guess who, coloured in pictures etc. We had some lovely conversations.

However a table nearby had 1child who was glued to an iPad and a dad on his phone. They hardly spoke to each other. It’s hard for the kids for the parents don’t set an example.

As a flip side when I was a kid my mother sent us to play outside from morning to evening. We had limited adult interaction and use to fight constantly with my siblings. Teenage pregnancy, alcohol and drug use is all down compared to my generation….there is some positives

I had dinner over Christmas in a local restaurant with a big group. The young kids 6-10 were chatty and sociable. The 15-18 year olds were like zombies and just on their phones. They didn’t speak, look up, make eye contact. They added nothing. The younger kids were bright and engaging. The parents of the teenagers ordered for them too which I was shocked about. I always tell my young kids to order for themselves.

It's also really sad that local primary schools have signs up on the gates and in the playgrounds, asking parents to put their phones away to greet their kids.

However, I've mentioned that on here in the past only for people to chime in with 'But what about if they're on an important business call?' 🙄

According to statistics, over half the residents in this borough of working age, are unemployed so it's doubtful.

My experience is no less valid than yours or anyone else's.

And people may not be saying it directly, but they are banging on about how we all chatted on public transport or how nobody ever ignored each other in pubs or restaurants - ironically while staring at a screen themselves, lol.

I mean, if screens are so awful and lead to such bad socialisation skills, surely all the people posting on here complaining are just being massive hypocrites?

I'm with you OP. Every week at my DC's swimming lesson there's a parent who plonks an iPad (at full volume) in front of their young child. The parent isn't working. Just grabs a coffee, scrolls though social media, chats to random people. I find it depressing they can't just chat to their 3 year old for half an hour. I'm sure others will say maybe that's the only time they go on it etc etc but nope, it's just excuses to me. Three DC and they never needed a screen to entertain them out and about.

Yes but the no of parents who don’t talk to their kids because they are glued to the phone is ridiculous

I really don’t think kids can win these days

you shouldn’t let your children out on their own it’s a dangerous world now ( again makes no sense ) because I swear my generation has the most kidnapped children ever )
but they shouldn’t be playing video games, talking to their friends on the phone etc

we either need to give them more freedom again or stop judging them for their screen time habits.

It was ever thus - there is no golden age when we all communicated with each other on public transport. Every generation finds some 'threat' to worry about, be it books, newspapers or Sony Walkmans. Phones and i-pads are no worse than books for young children and in many ways they are better, in that they are interactive.

It's also not about "everyone socialising beautifully". It's about taking a breather and looking around you, people watching and taking in society and how people behave day to day. Engaging and responding with parents and other people, looking at everyday things like birds and dogs on leads. Having conversation no matter how mundane.

Being bored is also seriously underrated - having time to clear your brain and think is only a good thing. It breeds creativity and original thought. If you're constantly plugged into videos you are missing so much important stuff. Nothing on an iPad is as important as real life.

Why? 😳

What people are saying is there's a time and a place for screens, that's all.

For example I'm home alone right now and ok, I'm ignoring my greyhound but she's fast asleep on the sofa.

Totally agree.

I posted on another thread recently about how I'd go into town with friends aged 8-9 without my parents, and everyone was horrified and saying they'd ring social services if they knew of it happening today.

Surely if they aren’t working then they are with their 3 year old the other 12 waking hours if the day?

That’s depressing . They shouldn’t be answering work calls at school drop off or pick up time. Just horrible.

They are much worse. Do you work with children? The dopamine hit from games ( phones, I pads etc) means they don't want to do ANYTHING else. They are purposely made that way. The UK has a huge problem with children and screens, in many other countries children play with others outside. Still happens here but no where near the level it should.

Children's childhoods have changed immensely. And the for the worse.

Because people are going on about how awful screens are, but use them for hours themselves.

I mean - why is it okay to use a screen when you're home alone but it's not okay to use one to have some downtime in a restaurant or at an airport? Is it because one is in public or something?

Some of these children may have additional needs (not all of them of course but as onlookers we can’t tell) Wearing headphones and having access to their technology is likely to mean the difference between them being able to go to a restaurant or not.

It is horrible to see sometimes, especially when they rush out to show their parent what they've made or the painting they did or something, and the parent just nods at the teacher as they grab the kid's hand and walk off with their ear still glued to the phone.

I've seen it many times.

Yep and they respond with well it’s not as safe as it used to be 🤣🤣🤣
there has always been bad people, they could have always been kidnapped but the chances are slim.

And I grew up with my head in a book not wanting to do anything else. I'd read in the car, while walking, while sitting in a restaurant, while watching TV. I even used to sit and read in the bath and would stay up late to read.

I do agree screens give dopamine hits but I also think if it wasn't screens, it would be something else.

I used to worry about this but actually my kids are all older now and they are nowhere near as into their phones as they were when they were at school etc, when it seemed such a big deal.

I definitely think there are disadvantages to too much technology, but there are also people like my own autistic DC who would benefit from a world with less socialising. People who enjoy socialising will always find a way to do so.

No, it's because when I go to a restaurant it's to enjoy a meal and conversation with the person/people I've gone with.

I'm surprised it needs explaining really.