To feel sad about comments on my hair?

[kindlypudding]

I know it's a first world problem, I know. There are people with so many issues that this seems daft, but here we are.

I have naturally very wavy hair, mixed with soft curls, that has a tendency to poof a bit. For decades I ironed it or blow dried, but in the past 2 yrs something has changed. I let it stay natural for a while during rough weather as got sick of fighting it and was absolutely shocked by how much my natural hair suited my face.
I suddenly adored it.
It took some time to repair, but started to grow and a lot of the frizz calmed down. I don't use a method, and don't wish to, but for the first time in my life I grew to love my natural texture and colour. However, by it's nature it is slightly drier and poofier than straight hair, I have the sort of hair that is very gossamer, fairytale-like, and fine, so it is a bit ethereal. This is good in some ways as it makes my face look softer, younger and nice, compared to the harsher effect of ironing it.

But since embracing it, I have had some odd comments that have left me a bit flat.
It's no one's job to lift me up, but I had honestly quit caring what anyone thought until this.
A few friends have either ignored it completely (and it is a very different look!) or asked if I should consider cutting it all off. One was surprised it was natural and asked had I had a bad perm . Another friend who I hadn't seen until recently said upon meeting me 'Awwww, we need to cheer you up and sort your hair out" (wtf)

Everywhere I go online everyone seems to want to get rid of hair like mine, so even though I have come to adore it, I am somewhat concerned that I am making an ass of myself. A few strangers out and about have actually complimented me, which really stood out!

And that's the mad bit, I really love it, I love the fluffy prettiness and how healthy it now is. It is sad that my natural texture is seen as 'unhealthy', since I don't use heat, eat a good diet and am healthy and fit.

Here is a pic of it, sadly in lamplight so doesn't show true colour (mid blonde). It is bra length and collar bone length at the front. It isn't a good pic as you can't see length or volume but it gives an idea of curl pattern and condition.

How do you get over this kind of weird attitude to your hair?

I think it looks good personally!

You dyed your red hair?! Are you crazy?!!😆 It's gorgeous.

@kindlypudding "I love the fluffy prettiness and how healthy it now is"

Do you know there's no such thing as healthy hair? Hair is dead matter, that's why it doesn't hurt when it's cut.
I believe shampoo manufacturers are not allowed to put "healthy hair" in their product description, although I often see "healthy looking hair" on the back of shampoo bottles.

I really hope natural hair, faces, lips, everything comes back into fashion. I think we may be waiting a while though.

Well I think it's absolutely gorgeous, and I would kill my granny for it!

Fact is, OP, you not only have excellent natural hair, you live near a Booths. You truly have the best life! Just luxuriate in how innately lucky you are.

I suspect the comments are due to surprise, especially if people weren't aware you have wavy hair. I have wavy hair too, and I used to use straighteners but got fed up with straightening my hair every day. I now just use a curl lotion after I wash it, and let it dry naturally - the waves look amazing and I love it! If you like your wavy hair, then embrace it! Ignore other people, it's your hair, not there's!

Yes I get this. I grew up in the 80's with super thick, long curly hair when short gaur was fashionable. People still loved my hair.
However now it's literally only acceptable to gave long blow dried hair. I go to the hairdressers once or twice a year and without fail they all want to straighten it after my cut/ colour / highlights.
I like a blow dry but came out of the salon on Tuesday looking like I wearing a cheap wig. So bizarre.

Can I ask what curl lotion you use? I've naturally curly/wavy hair and find a lot of the curl products make it hard or wet looking.

OP this is the offending 'wild and unkempt ' hair of mine that the medic was so offfended by. Oh the shame.

I like it

How weird, to pay someone to write that about you, though

Your hair is perfectly 'normal' if you see what I mean, it is tousled and pretty. I imagined it to be like Hagrid from their description. I would honestly have said something about that. It would grind my gears.

People are probably jealous, ignore them

OP, your hair is lovely, ignore.

@Ladamesansmerci yours is lovely too and that is one dotey baby.

They straighten it to get you out quicker and so they don't have to change the hairdryer attachment.

That looks like lovely hair

Solidarity 💪

I have very similar hair, albeit slightly curlier, and really like it. It feels like something that is distinctively ‘mine’. I do get a few glances from men, even in my late forties, as I think it has a slightly ‘angelic’ vibe!

However, I do like straightening it too. I do so a couple of times a week and enjoy that look. Sometimes on a curly day I just run my straightening brush over the parting, as the smoothness helps the overall appearance. The best results are letting it air-dry from soaking wet, as it then forms into lovely smooth curls.

I find a very wide-toothed comb (it looks a bit like a claw!) useful for morning tidying. But brushing is also fine too, as curls often seem to re-form themselves after exposure to a bit of humidity.

Mine does go all Crystal Tips with no product but unlike OP's, it's very coarse. It needs softening and a bit of protein so I use a conditioner with a bit in and and a leave in with a bit in (kinky curly knot today) before a bit (lot) of gel. My shampoo is full on sulphates, though.

i doubt we are ever fully satisfied, I would love mine to be heavier and courser, it would suit my style. Mine is like candy floss when brushed, lighter than air. I would love some weight to my hair.
Same time I kind of like the fluff, it's great when we can work with what we have. I love seeing more and more women embracing that!

It's particularly fluffy, tonight. My scalp dictates that I wash it every other day or else it gets quite irritated and smelly but it was happy today, so I left it, happy to avoid 8 hours of wet hair. I had a massive ringlet in that bit of hair until this afternoon then it disintegrated!

It loves the cold weather we had, last week. Shiny with defined curls. Then the thaw started on Sunday and poof! It was bigger than my shoulders, again.

I have similar hair type I have it up a lot (just like my hair out the way tied up) but really like having it down like this in summer !

I'd love wavy hair like that.

Eta Meant to put @PickAChew

You seem to have odd hairdressers in the UK. I have been a regular salon visitor all my life and not once has a hairdresser suggested I have my hair straightened. They usually tell me how lucky I am!

I love your hair , it reminds me of Taylor swifts hair as she goes through the era tour set list , starts off poker straight and often ends with her hair looking like yours in your pic, beautiful and a lovely colour too OP

Wow..... so beautiful....