Party bag gate part 2 - enter DH stage left

[JandamiHash]

Original thread https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5252894-child-didnt-get-a-party-bag?page=40&reply=141398805

To all the baked potato loving legends out there who followed my original thread, I couldn’t resist sharing what I think is a rather funny update.

So I’ve been away for a work conference today and didn’t check my phone til 2pm. Amanda had called me again! And messaged to say “Jandami can you call me please when you get the chance so I can find out what to ask this magician?”

I assume she means she wants to find out if I’ll pay for a party bag. So I messaged DH (who is fully invested in the drama) laughing about it. I didn’t reply to her as had to go back in the conference (and still haven’t replied only just got home).

Anyway at pick up, DH was standing in the playground waiting for DS and Amanda sidled up to him and said “Excuse me Neil? Is your wife’s phone broken?” (emphasis on the ‘is’ apparently). He just looked at her, said “No” and walked off to wait at the other side of the playground 😂 the best bit is - his name is not Neil!

I can only assume she’s either micro dosing with hallucinogenics or is genuinely mad. Nobody normal behaves this way.

PS jacket potato with pancetta, cheese, soured cream and chives tonight 🤤

Looking all that up implies the same for you hun x

I wonder if James is vegan? Maybe his mother is and she felt peckish?

Is it just me that is way over invested in this thread 😂

Is there a magic number of posts that you prefer OPs to make?

Im a bit worried about all the posters who are being forced to read this thread against their will. If someone is holding a gun to your head then perhaps call for help?

@IcySheep says the person checking how many posts someone has made in a public forum for making posts?

I’m sure the whole purpose of mumsnet is we are allowed to use it and there’s no post limit?

I'm loving OPs posts.

There is also a healthy dose of Mumsnet batshittery which is hilarious too.

A good couple of threads all round 😂

Bit passive aggressive 🤭

Comment away! I just don’t see your point? Your point seemed to be that 200 is too many bit when asked that you got quite pissy. So what’s your point?

You can comment about the number of posts OP has made, but I'm not sure why you would do this. Obviously OP is invested as it's her thread. I much prefer threads where the OP engages and responds to other posters.

It's tasty if you like garlic! It's spreadable and creamy, but it's got a bit of texture I suppose. Roulé is the same, I guess boursin is a brand name

Nope day off, lots of doing nothing (so sorry I’m not busier, I guess?)

I haven't rtft, but I have no idea who to side with now because this thread now just seems a bit mean: the fact that your husband ignored her in the playground - over a pizza, and the request for a party bag!! She's a CF for sure but I'm not sure anyone comes out of this looking good - except maybe the kids.

Hard hat firmly in place.

He didn’t ignore her. He answered her question. Just perhaps not in the way she would’ve wanted him too.

Honestly @JandamiHash - from some of the comments you’d think you’d told them to leave the party as James wasn’t welcome without an RSVP and an idiot for not replying (or similar).
I’m sure in a slightly different scenario where party bags were generic and you happened to have a spare you’d have given it to him. You didn’t have a spare so unfortunately he didn’t get one. Any semi reasonable parent who forgot to RSVP would apologise for the oversight and accept it meant their child might not be fully catered for. If it were me who had forgotten to reply I would have offered to pay for the vegan piazza too. We all make mistakes and she’s not an awful person for forgetting to RSVP but her subsequent behaviour is ridiculous in the extreme. Maybe it’s not that nice to mention it on mumsnet with identifying information but if she’s been like this about the party bags the other school parents will already know she’s a pita and no one else (eg family/colleagues) is likely to recognise her so it’s not going to do any real harm.

Can you write a self help book please… “How to tell those Amanda’s to F off” and let us know when it’s published

I’ve read other follow ups where people are trying to get out of bad situations and MN happens to have had good advice and support. It wouldn’t be fair to say some follow up threads are allowed but others aren’t, especially as some would be borderline cases. I don’t see the issue with this thread, either. Everyone’s free to just not read it.

Genuine question: if you think I’ve handled it badly, what would you have done in my shoes?

God people are loony. You could have had spares that were not personalised but then had her son got one she would have likely still text you feeling aggrieved. There just is no pleasing some people. I also don't understand why anyone would think you were unreasonable for not ordering a gf pizza until you knew you needed one? I wouldn't have let the boy go hungry and you didn't but for the mum to just take the pizza without asking was rude! It's best not to give into her lunacy and that of several posters on the thread. My dad always says, 'you cant argue with stupid' so I'd just block her number and ignore her. If she comes up to you in the playground I'd sigh, fix her with a stare and say, 'honestly Amanda are you still going on about the party bag?' and then walk away.

My dh deals with the party invites in our house and once he text the rsvp back to an incorrect number. He's very prompt with them normally often texting yes or no the week they are received and then updates all our calendars. After a week of no reply he checked realised his mistake and sent another text explaining what he had done and if it was till ok for our son to come. The invites had been sent 3 weeks in advance and thankfully the parent responded it was fine and they would love to have our son there and checked dietary requirements. I did tell ds that as it was a week before the party that we had sent the rsvp he might not get a party bag (the mum hadn't implied this though) and that it wasn't the end of the world if he didn't. Not all parties around our way have them. I shared this because yes cock ups do happen but it's then our responsibility as parents to manage our kids expectations not the hosts.