DS has been offered jobs in Qatar and UAE

[Sooptimisim]

DS is 26, he works in finance and has a good job in London. He has recently informed us that he has been offered jobs in both Doha and Dubai and is heavily considering taking them.
I know it’s not up to me but I really can’t settle at the thought of him moving to either of these countries. I associate them with poor women’s rights, little political freedom/freedom of speech etc.
I am trying to be supportive but I’m actually finding it very hard to be.
It isn’t about him moving away as my DD is in Australia doing a masters degree, it’s just the terrible women’s (and human) rights etc.

AIBU to ask him to consider all of this before making a decision?

Some very odd views on these countries here. I have lived in Dubai. Not by choice. It actually has many benefits for women. Yes I am very aware of all the issues and worked as a volunteer out there.
I’d get him to check the package carefully. Wouldn’t be moving to either place if I couldn’t save money.

No experience of visiting even but I’d say get him to look at laws and rules and engage with others on reality of pay and lifestyle

It’s his choice really

Don’t be ridiculous- if you were offered millions of course you’d go for (only) a visit. Silly thing to say.
I’ve reported the Islamophobic posts too.
Your DS just needs to make sure he’s fully au fait with the laws of those countries & he’ll be fine.

The troll is trolling all over MN. They are just lookimg to get reaction. Ignore (and report as few of us did).

Call me ridiculous if you want, but no I would not go.

I wouldn't want my kids working there either, but it's up to him. I would make suggest he works out if its financially worthwhile, the wages can be really good, but it's an expensive place to live too.

Looks like @Cutecuddle has met a grisly end.

So, in theory, if you were offered say a minimum of one million to go on a week’s holiday in Dubai (all paid for) you’d refuse?!?

I would advise him to research carefully and make sure he thoroughly understands what he needs to do to stay out of trouble. And do his homework on any offers and make sure they are really solid. I would not try to change his mind about going. And look on the bright side: he may be able to make a lot of money there (housing deposit?), and he's unlikely to want to stay out there long-term as there aren't very easy pathways to long-term residence/citizenship there.

At 26, one would think that's he's au fait enough with the situation in such countries. The no alcohol and treatment of women has been known for decades. Nurses, medics, engineers, etc, are all told about the 'rules and regulations' before they go. They know there are rules for their enclaves and rules for outside the enclave.
He has a choice to make. Does he go with his morals or the opportunity to make shitloads of money?

Yes, because most people, particularly women, don't want to prostitute themselves in such a way. Not everyone is seduced by excess bling and common displays of wealth, nor will they overlook a lack of human rights for money.
But you go for it...

Beg him not to go.

It was certainly the case when I lived there that it was said that it tended to be the mediocre who couldn’t hack it elsewhere who took up finance jobs in Dubai. (Not my field, but I had law and banking friends who came out from London to consult for short periods when finance/bankruptcy laws were being written.) Quite apart from the fact that it was the dullest place I’ve ever lived, and that I found the climate depressing, and its increasing track record of oppressing even its own citizens, he should ask around very seriously about what taking a job in the UAE is likely to mean for his career longterm.

@RosaMoline some people have principles

At age 26, this really has nothing to do with you. Be supportive and let him follow his own path.

I don’t believe either of you.
It wouldn’t be my choice if holiday destination to be fair, but if I was offered million/millions to go, of course I bloody would! And anyone who’s trying to be all virtuous…that’s madness. It’s not like it’s Afghanistan or Syria.

Exactly. It’s easy to virtue signal.

I get it @Sooptimisim . I would not be happy about my son going there BUT I wouldn't tell him. I would just tell him to read up on current affairs so that he knows what he's going into (send links). Because men can get in trouble as well in Islamic countries...Just think about the british man jailed for having consentual sex with someone his age!

It will be a good opportunity for him to experience other cultures and broaden his horizons.

Yes

Is it a good career move? What’s the form like and is this a long term move or will he get opportunities in other regions? Does he speak Arabic or have a particular understanding of the financial world there?

As a woman living and working in the UAE, I can assure you that I'm not oppressed and neither are my friends and colleagues. Emirati culture includes arranged marriage in some instances, but that's also widespread in lots of other countries and cultures.

I appreciate that spaces for women are protected here and I don't have to deal with gender neutral toilets and changing rooms. The Metro has a ladies carriage. I just had to get used to the fact that they ask 'are you married' before they ask 'could you be pregnant' when you have an x ray!

It's a great place to live and work at any age, I'd encourage him to give it a go.

I’d be very disappointed if one of my kids did this. The ‘lifestyle’ people boast about is based on the slave Labour of others. Or not far off it.

@useitorlose why do they ask if you are married?

Also what job are you in? Low income?

There’s no harm discussing it with him, as you might discuss other things.

As a 26yr old, he’ll have a great time. The most important thing for him to remember is that these are strict Muslim countries. Although he may have a good life - socialising etc it’s a bubble. If he has a good solid offer (not a flakey contract), and as long as he remembers that he’s in a fake bubble, sticks to their rules and doesn’t drink too much, he’ll be fine.

Agree with @Diomi about the hypocrisy (not yours but the west in general).