Hubs won't get the snip!!

[241719robs]

Am I being unreasonable that my hubby wont even consider getting the snip? He just replies with 'maybe one day'.

We have children already and I am 99% DONE. My body has been through enough and mentally Im burnt out. After contraception for years, pregnancy, birth, and breastfeeding I dont want to go back on contraception or risk condoms etc. I know vasectomies are not 100% but better than me having to go through invasive procedures again. Im also late for my period and after 2 negative pregnancy tests Ive explained how unfair it is for me to be worrying about this every month. He basically ignored me as he knew what I was getting at.

Am I being a b*tch? Hes not had to go through anything physically and its not like I’m asking him to chop his bits off 🥲

Of course!
And also people may not always do everything perfectly despite doing their very best to follow the instructions. Some times just putting them on causes them to split. Accidents happen. That’s life!

Data suggests that 1 in 5 women per year get pregnant using condoms as the only method of contraception.
OP is not at all unreasonable for feeling cautious about the reliability of this method

Did you even read the OP? Or you jumped in just to pick a fight?

.

Not read the full thread, but just wanted to point out to those suggesting OP have tubal ligation that this, apart from being much more invasive than a vasectomy, carries a risk of ectopic pregnancy. Which can be life threatening. It's also not so easy to access as a vasectomy is for men, unless the woman meets certain criteria. I've heard many accounts of women being refused, despite having 2,3,4 children, because they 'might change their mind'.

I've had tubal ligation. I have had 4 children and 3 c sections. It was done during the last c section as my doctor and I both agreed any further pregnancies would be too dangerous. The risks were explained to me beforehand and I was happy to have the procedure as I felt the peace of mind outweighed the risk. I can't take hormonal contraception as the side effects are debilitating, can't have a coil because of an overly sensitive cervix and condoms are just not reliable enough. Period tracking is all well and good if your cycle is like clockwork, but many of us just don't work that way. If I hadn't had the procedure my husband would have happily had a vasectomy and had already started looking into it. Of course no one can tell another person what to do with their own body, but when you are an adult, married, and a parent with responsibilities sometimes you make difficult decisions that you find uncomfortable (maybe even temporarily painful) because it is for the good of your family. If you're unable to even discuss the possibility of that then you shouldn't be in a relationship or fathering children. Why is it that men are allowed, even expected/encouraged to be selfish while women are expected to put everyone else first to their own detriment?

100 % Yanbu.

Can't agree more @NorthernGirl1981

In my case, his refusal to have a vasectomy and the anxieties built up within me around getting pregnant just made sex shit forever.

Making accurate statements , supported by evidence is hardly "clutching at straws" 😂 even the NHS are clear that condoms are not 100% effective, even when used properly. I doubt Durex are particularly worried about the 2%.

www.nhs.uk/contraception/methods-of-contraception/condoms/#:~:text=Condoms%20are%20up%20to%2098,penis%20has%20touched%20the%20vagina

They aren’t worried because it states the failure rate on the box. You can’t sue when something happens that you’ve been told might happen - well you can, but you probably won’t be successful.

I don’t get the stupid back and forth over condoms. They aren’t 100% effective - even trying your hardest to use them correctly. They can’t be - they’re a manufactured item and no manufactured item can be 100% perfect all of the time. I don’t blame op for not wanting to rely on them solely for contraception.

Wow.

“some frothing at the mouth feminist demands”

“Sadly many men… pander to these ridiculous women”

As we can see on the thread many women use the threat of withdrawing sex as a veiled tool of control

Time more men started knocking one out
what does this mean.

Many cultures have men dominating women but the west has gone the other way

This isn't “misogyny" , it's fact.
(🤣🤣🤣)

the screeching/demands

When the 45 year old female threatens to withhold sex for ridiculous demands

Ive Never encountered this kind of misogynistic rage so bold and out there before .
😱

Ha, well said. Be careful - you may be called a misogynistic incel like I was. You'll see the majority of those in this thread wishing for the OP to manhandle her husband and do away with his bits.

Steer clear of women like this. Many are angry and bitter.

Nobody is fooled here - both of these posts are written by the same person.

Just joined mn today, have we?! 🤣

100% and the onetealbalonz one too. Same language. Pathetic 😂

Crikey! We're all the same person because we have a similar stance? Comedy gold.

😂

Ha, well said. Be careful - you may be called a misogynistic incel like I was

Incel is a movement of men based on the concept of being “involuntarily celibate” .
That poster made it clear that he believes himself entitled to claim sex from women and if they say no they are abusive and controlling.
Thats literally what the movement is about…
🤷🏼‍♀️

You just happened to stumble across the thread then?

It's a trending thread. What's wrong with him commenting? I don't understand the logic.

@BeAzurePoet @MrPepInHisStep90 don’t worry it will all be ok - they finally made a handmaid’s tale for men. Go join your buddies 😘😘😘

To be fair this poster said men should make themselves ‘voluntarily’ celibate and just use their hand. Quite why he thinks women would be at all bothered about them choosing to do doing that, is quite beyond me.

Aww he's gone already 😥

100% this. ^ 👏

I’m sure another random man, who’s just signed up today, will pop along shortly.