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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To send them home? (trigger warning grooming gangs)

356 replies

DarkAndConfusingTimes · 11/01/2025 13:43

The Rape and Grooming scandal is blowing up on twitter/social media and the extent of the scandal is actually mind boggling. Apparently up to 250,000 girls may have been affected 😱

This initially shocked me but when I thought of it, although I’m based in a rural area I know of two girls who have been caught up in it - one of whom in my class at school was raped in a park aged around thirteen and another family friends daughter found naked in a room with a group of adult men at the age of 14 and was blamed for leading them all on. Those living in towns/cities must see so much more of this?!

I’ve also heard today that Pakistan is willing to take back criminals convicted in the Uk of these crimes (UK-Pakistan Prisoner treaty agreement) and has been for a number of years but we’re not sending them back. I know not all perpetrators are Pakistani and not all Pakistani men are capable of such evil (and I work with plenty of decent Pakistani men), but of those who are convicted and born there why on earth are they still here in the UK if we can remove them as a danger from our society and their home country is willing to take them?

In have two daughters and I’m honestly terrified for their future given this significant threat to young girls in this country. It seems like no one cares enough to rock the boat.

YABU - No they should remain here and we should deal with it
YANBU - They should be sent back

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
ACatNamedRobin · 11/01/2025 13:45

Absolutely agree with you OP.
Are we sure though that Pakistan is open to taking back their citizens? They might be only saying that but wanting something (political) in return for it.

BallerinaRadio · 11/01/2025 13:49

I would imagine most of these people are British born so I'm not sure where you want to send them back to

Garedenhelp · 11/01/2025 13:51

The girls in Pakistan need protection too.

FutureFeelsBleak · 11/01/2025 13:51

Where will we send the white British grooming gangs?

Adamante · 11/01/2025 13:52

Couldn’t agree more. Any migrant convicted of such crimes should be returned to country or origin as a standard part of their sentence. I cannot comprehend why this is even controversial.

biscuitandcake · 11/01/2025 13:52

DarkAndConfusingTimes · 11/01/2025 13:43

The Rape and Grooming scandal is blowing up on twitter/social media and the extent of the scandal is actually mind boggling. Apparently up to 250,000 girls may have been affected 😱

This initially shocked me but when I thought of it, although I’m based in a rural area I know of two girls who have been caught up in it - one of whom in my class at school was raped in a park aged around thirteen and another family friends daughter found naked in a room with a group of adult men at the age of 14 and was blamed for leading them all on. Those living in towns/cities must see so much more of this?!

I’ve also heard today that Pakistan is willing to take back criminals convicted in the Uk of these crimes (UK-Pakistan Prisoner treaty agreement) and has been for a number of years but we’re not sending them back. I know not all perpetrators are Pakistani and not all Pakistani men are capable of such evil (and I work with plenty of decent Pakistani men), but of those who are convicted and born there why on earth are they still here in the UK if we can remove them as a danger from our society and their home country is willing to take them?

In have two daughters and I’m honestly terrified for their future given this significant threat to young girls in this country. It seems like no one cares enough to rock the boat.

YABU - No they should remain here and we should deal with it
YANBU - They should be sent back

Is that before or after they have served their sentences? There was more recently a case where a (white Dutch) man was convicted of getting a 13 year old drunk and raping her repeatedly. He was sent back to the Netherlands 1 year into his sentence and immediately released. He represented the Dutch in last summers Olympics.

I think such an outcome with perpetrators of grooming would make people a lot more angry. There is also something unethical about just sending a convicted paedophile back to another country to potentially abuse more children there. AFTER they have served their sentences is another discussion! (I think we should send them over via a trebuchet but that's not realistic alas). But they committed their crimes in Britain. They should serve their sentences in a British prison where we have control over what happens to them.

A lot are dual nationality which gets more complicated. e.g. we might also want to send back Andrew Tate who was born in America and is an American citizen but of course, America could refuse to take him. Or he could be sent back there and build a hero following and live a life of rilly with old Musky-boi who seems to be a fan. Sometimes sending someone back is a good idea. Sometimes it isn't.

TheGrimSqueakersFlea · 11/01/2025 13:54

@BallerinaRadio I think it's pretty obvious how this thread will go. Someone will be along shortly to explain how they're not racist, but ...

There's been an awful lot of these threads recently

Snatherwang · 11/01/2025 13:54

please do not get your news from Twitter/ social media. Get it from a reputable source or you’re just falling for the far right rubbish

Adamante · 11/01/2025 13:55

FutureFeelsBleak · 11/01/2025 13:51

Where will we send the white British grooming gangs?

We will keep them and punish them here because this is where they came from and if they committed their crimes in another country then they’re our responsibility and they should be returned after serving their sentence in that country.

DarkAndConfusingTimes · 11/01/2025 13:55

FutureFeelsBleak · 11/01/2025 13:51

Where will we send the white British grooming gangs?

Hmmm in my view they should go to our own British prisons for a lengthy sentence and then once released be put on the sex offenders register for life with monitoring. Gang rape is as bad as murder - it’s animalistic and sickening. Even more so given the age of many of the victims in this scandal.

OP posts:
Privee · 11/01/2025 13:56

FutureFeelsBleak · 11/01/2025 13:51

Where will we send the white British grooming gangs?

Nowhere, obviously

Echobelly · 11/01/2025 13:58

I think it's reasonable to send them backto where they are from, but if the government is going to put the effort into doing that, then they ought to put concomittant effort into preventing all grooming and violence against women and children.

spuddy4 · 11/01/2025 14:09

FutureFeelsBleak · 11/01/2025 13:51

Where will we send the white British grooming gangs?

If they are British then prison, if they are not British then back to wherever they came from. I don't see what's difficult about that.

Startingagainandagain · 11/01/2025 14:10

OP your logic is flawed. You assume these men were not born in Britain.

Many will be British citizen of Pakistani background.

Are you also prepared for us to welcome back the British prisoners who are currently in foreign jails and pay for their jail time here? or people like Shamima Begum?

Because if you want to send back non UK citizen who commit of crime to their country of origin, you also need to realise it will mean taking back British prisoners who are currently serving time abroad.

Iamsunshineinabag · 11/01/2025 14:10

Adamante · 11/01/2025 13:52

Couldn’t agree more. Any migrant convicted of such crimes should be returned to country or origin as a standard part of their sentence. I cannot comprehend why this is even controversial.

This!

Although most people seem to agree until it comes to taking Shemima Begum back...

Adamante · 11/01/2025 14:12

Not me, from the outset I have said she should be taken back. She was a child when she went, she should never have made it out of the country. She's our responsibility.

Locutus2000 · 11/01/2025 14:13

Here's an article from 2023 discussing the issue which we are being told was never addressed before'. That said, it's devoid of the gory details which have been highlighted most recently.

It comes as Home Secretary Suella Braverman made several comments about the ethnicity of abusers in high-profile gangs.

In the Mail on Sunday she said "the perpetrators are groups of men, almost all British-Pakistani".

To the BBC she said the gangs were "overwhelmingly" made up of British-Pakistani males.

The grooming gangs were not made up of immigrants, therefore you can't 'send them home'.

The article is critical of both the police and government of the time who did a terrible job of addressing the recommendations and worth reading.

A previous piece of research from 2015 found that of 1,231 perpetrators of "group and gang-based child sexual exploitation", 42% were white, 14% were defined as Asian or Asian British and 17% black.

The problem is that the data is from only 19 out of more than 40 police forces and nearly a decade old.

As far as I can find out we are still working from the 2015 numbers.

In 2022 the Independent Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse investigated abuse in six cities which had not experienced a high profile grooming case.

It found evidence that gang-based abuse was happening, and of widespread failures by the police to record the ethnicity of perpetrators.

This "makes it impossible to know whether any particular ethnic group is over-represented as perpetrators of child sexual exploitation by networks," the report concluded.

Basically the data and reporting have been terrible but It's still not immigrants doing this awful stuff. These people were born here, which somehow makes it even worse.

username299 · 11/01/2025 14:14

As far as I'm aware the vast majority are British. As such they should serve time in Britain.

I believe a few have been stripped off their British citizenship but it's difficult to remove them.

A few are immigrants so obviously should be deported where possible.

DarkAndConfusingTimes · 11/01/2025 14:16

@Snatherwang But it’s not just what I’m seeing on twitter, like I said I know two girls in real life, & heard of others through friends.

This is a real issue, not just something made up to stir up tensions by a far right bot or minority. It’s an actual chronic and widespread problem in many of our towns that’s been going on for over a generation.

It’s a stretch to say individuals outraged on social media are automatically ‘far right’ surely? Your dismissive viewpoint strikes me as quite dangerous and naive.

OP posts:
Ohnonotmeagain · 11/01/2025 14:16

As pp said, many will be British of Pakistani descent.

many Pakistani men with pakistani citizenship flee back to Pakistan before they can be arrested. After murdering Sharon Beshevinshy in 2005 Piran Ditta Khan fled to Pakistan and was only arrested in 2020 and returned to the UK in 2023. He was 71 so has lived most of his life free.

the Somalian suspect was extradited back to the uk in 2007, for comparison.

username299 · 11/01/2025 14:16

DarkAndConfusingTimes · 11/01/2025 14:16

@Snatherwang But it’s not just what I’m seeing on twitter, like I said I know two girls in real life, & heard of others through friends.

This is a real issue, not just something made up to stir up tensions by a far right bot or minority. It’s an actual chronic and widespread problem in many of our towns that’s been going on for over a generation.

It’s a stretch to say individuals outraged on social media are automatically ‘far right’ surely? Your dismissive viewpoint strikes me as quite dangerous and naive.

Edited

The vast majority are British OP.

Locutus2000 · 11/01/2025 14:17

OP, the point is you have associated immigrants with the grooming gangs, which is untrue.

VelvetWildflower · 11/01/2025 14:19

If they're not British, upon committing a crime they should be deported. I don't think we should be housing and paying for criminals that aren't 'ours'.

But the vast majority of these disgusting men are British. They are unfortunately our problem. Part of the reason they did what they did may be cultural to them but that's a separate problem. If they're British, they should serve their sentences here.

But they should absolutely be investigated regardless of race or culture. No more treading lightly. Couldn't give a shit. Break the law, face the consequences.

MissyB1 · 11/01/2025 14:20

DarkAndConfusingTimes · 11/01/2025 14:16

@Snatherwang But it’s not just what I’m seeing on twitter, like I said I know two girls in real life, & heard of others through friends.

This is a real issue, not just something made up to stir up tensions by a far right bot or minority. It’s an actual chronic and widespread problem in many of our towns that’s been going on for over a generation.

It’s a stretch to say individuals outraged on social media are automatically ‘far right’ surely? Your dismissive viewpoint strikes me as quite dangerous and naive.

Edited

That still doesn’t mean they were born abroad. Why won’t you acknowledge the majority of these men will be British born?

multicolouredbunting · 11/01/2025 14:21

Absolutely 100% agree with sending all foreign nationals who commit a crime back to their country of origin. (Over 10,000 in UK prisons from gov statistics)

And every UK national is to come back and serve their time here. Including Begum. It's quite hard to find numbers for how many UK prisoners abroad, but gov publications numbers show under 1500 are being supported by a charity in UK.

If that's roughly the number then it's a win win. As it would free up spaces in our prisons also.

I'm not sure what the argument against it is?

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