To ask my partner to walk me to the bus stop?

[eightsaie]

I'm heading into town
The bus stop is a minute walk around the corner but it's really icy outside and my shoes have no grip at all.
I fell over yesterday and got a bit of a shock.
I'm going to grab some better footwear in town.
I said to my partner do you mind walking me to the bus stop so I can hold on to you just incase I fall.
He kicked off saying who walks him back home?
So I get to the bus stop with no thought for him etc etc
Anyway I said it's okay il just walk around myself-if I fall I fall
Aibu to ask him?
He says it's his only day off

Chivalry is dead.

I know a man that meets his girlfriend off the train at their stop every day and they walk home together. It’s very sweet. Some men are thoughtful, some aren’t.

These posts seem small and insignificant but it’s such a small gesture to show you care about someone and I hate how so many see it as silly.

Blimey he made a fuss about a 1 minute walk?
Obviously you wouldn't have asked him if you weren't still shaken from the fall yesterday.
What a gentleman (not).

You sound like a very good daughter
I'm glad your DH walked with you in the end. I hope he did it in a good humour. Kicking off was a bit rubbish IMHO.
I can see why you asked him. I hope you find some good replacement shoes today.
Personally I can't wait for Spring.!

If he had better footwear then he was being a twat.

Wtf? Where does she say it is because she is female?

Her partner has normal good winter shoes with reasonable grip, he uses them regularly for his work.
She noticed an issue with her footwear yesterday and needs to get to the shop to buy better ones.
Given that her winter grip shoes got lost during moving, it looks as the first winter in the new area.

She asked her partner for one-off support based on the fact that he is better equipped for the current weather.

That's hardly unreasonable.

Presumably you can leave the house alone though so it’s hardly the same.

Thank god chivalry is dead.

I think you are both BU.

A small fall may have shocked you but it doesn't seem like you've been seriously injured, in this weather it's not unexpected to happen. Town may be gritted but there may still be patches of ice that you can slip on.

He didn't need to react that way but he does have a point- you both could fall. Did you ask him at a bad time?- was he still in bed or just gotten up?

I have every sympathy and would do the same in your position, regardless of the gender of the person with sturdy shoes. Falling really jars you, as well as risks injury.

It's great that you've gone out to get sturdier shoes and I'd also recommend buying ice grips/grippers which fit to existing shoes and can be used to add grip when walking on snow and ice. They sell them on Amazon and other sites so you don't even need to go out to buy them

Is this man that you are talking about not displaying chivalry then?

OP, any decent man would do it.
When he behaved the way he did, he showed you EXACTLY who he is.
Listen.
So many women don't listen and wonder why they ended up with selfish pricks.

I agree. I can't believe the number of people saying 'it's a you problem' and how it's unreasonable a request. What's wrong with people? Their bar is so so low.

A loving partner would enjoy the feeling of being helpful whether it be practical help or emotional help.

The state of some relationships must be dire if this seems odd to them

It's not feminism. It's practical. The OP hasn't got shoes with tread

They are at DPs home so he can wear ice appropriate shoes and assist her.

Why is this a man woman thing? I would help a friend in the same situation.

Some shoes are literally impossible to walk in when it's icy

I honestly can’t believe some of the replies. Partners help each other. Otherwise what is the point of having one.

I don’t think you were unreasonable to ask at all and you had a valid reason to ask. His reaction was off.

How is it pathetic. Have you never walked in smooth shoes on ice? It can be actually impossible.

Some shoes have less than no grip. They are worse than if you had bare feet which of course isn't an option. Leather sole shoes for example. Death trap

He can wear thick tread shoes and assist. Like any friend should.

Ffs. Another one 🙄

I assume he's not nervous on the ice. I am even though I'm not disabled and fit as a flea. My DP would do this absolutely no problem. I don't really know why people want to be in relationships if helping each other out isn't part of the deal.

The point is once she gets to town, she can buy shoes and get to her dad alone.

Assume he makes you feel uncared for in other ways OP?
Its not a big thing to ask for if you were feeling anxious about slipping, whether that feels logical or not.

I have trainers but they're fashion type ones, not running
My other ones are for weight lifting and don't have the best grip

I did buy a pair of walking trainers which are great but if I didn't have those there isn't a chance of me getting to the bus stop near me! It's going up a slope then down and our road doesn't get gritted at all. I haven't been out walking or in the car for 4 days as it's sheet ice

Maybe just hold onto the wall as you walk?

Nothing, I would have the same opinion if it was a same sex couple.

My DH asks me to pick stuff off the floor if he drops something. I do but only because he is not as mobile as usual at the moment. Don’t mind if he asks nicely!

If your shoes have no grip, and that's why you are going into town to buy some...and his shoes do have a decent grip, I don't think you are being unreasonable to ask him to help you to the bus stop...a minutes walk away.

Couples are supposed to be there for one another, presumably you help him when he needs it.

She's trying to buy better shoes, that's rather the point.

Yes she should ideally have bought them in December when January was widely predicted to be imminent, but they are where they are.