What are people doing to their faces?!

[Mania89]

I am mid 30s. Colour my hair, wear makeup, thread my eyebrows etc so not completely natural but my goodness what are people doing to their faces?! Young women who are beautiful now have so much injected into their faces that they cannot move them at all. I was looking back at photos in my mid 20s and was wondering why on earth did I worry about my looks at all. Hindsight is wonderful! And I am despairing that girls younger than this have already started to inject Botox and fillers. The world is going mad and don’t even get me started on weight loss injections for those who are not clinically obese! I have two daughters and really feel so worried for them up.

@Gwenhwyfar it is but it’s partly driven by the desire to look good in photos & doc lives online.

It's the sex doll look I find so alarming. When did looking like a porn movie actress become something to aspire to?

It's sad when women see their value solely in terms of their sexual attractiveness. They also need to think of how men are seeing them and the type of man that likes to see women in this way.

@AllMoby I’d argue that an elevated level of ‘old-fashioned vanity or narcissism’ is an indicator of underlying low self-worth. That said, it’s a very human response - not to appear vulnerable etc 😞

100% agree with OP. I know it's a current trend and I am not trying to be judgemental but I can honestly say I have not seen one person look more attractive with lip filler. It's the fact that it's such a money-making business that I find tragic, getting young women to part with their hard earned cash to end up looking weird and grotesque. Other trends like gothic or punk fashion in the past, which in a similar way were thought to be weird and grotesque by many, at least could be cobbled together by those who favoured the look without parting with a few hundred pounds.

I hate the pout trouts and very obvious signs of work.

I Know someone who has been having fillers since her early 20s - she’s only just in her 30s! She said everyone her age does it now and it’s just normal.

I’ve had Botox in forehead for the first time a few months ago - was a HUGE decision for me and not done lightly. I went with a registered doctor who does it in a private clinic and only after checking reviews. No way would I ever go to a beautician or hairdresser and trust them to do it.

I haven’t told anyone I’ve had it done as I think I am embarrassed about admitting it! It’s made me more aware of others though and I’ve definitely looked at people and thought Botox would make a big difference to them!

I have a teenage DD and have no intention of telling her I’ve had it done. Feels hypocritical but my way of protecting her for as long as I can as I most definitely don’t want her to think it’s a part of everyday life at her age

Absolutely this. Saw a couple this morning like this, having breakfast in a hotel we were staying in. Woman full of fillers. Man wearing a horrible tracksuit and talking loudly on the speakerphone to someone about large sums of money. Just awful awful men and I don't know why these women want them, or make themselves look like cheap porn stars to get them. She was sat looking at her hands while he was on the phone making an embarrassment of himself, like she didn't know what to say or where to look.

Well I’d argue that it is just sometimes simply just aggressive but old fashioned vanity or narcissism - using their image to get their superficial needs met. For some it might be due to lack of self worth - but I certainly don’t think that’s the case for everyone. Or put another way: self-love is not the same as love of self.

While I wouldn’t have any of it I’m quite happy with how I look. But there’s a lot of people who aren’t and if that makes them feel better then who are we to judge their bodies their money.

So having worked in and around the industry for many years, aesthetic treatments were really originally aimed at women who were getting older and wanted to make tweaks without being obvious - that was the whole point. The first, and only time, I tried the lip thing (it was research for a written piece!) I had to get on a train and go to Harley Street. And all I got was a big lump and a cold sore! Never tried that again.
I can remember when Pamela Anderson caused a chase to get boob jobs and they became a status symbol. So they weren’t there to enhance anymore but to show off that you’d spent money on them. The bigger, the better for letting people know. Think Katie Price.
Now the whole aesthetics market is a huge, big sprawling mess of some qualified and medically trained practitioners, and then a huge number of improperly or non-trained people there to make money.
Most of the faces I see now have been enhanced, and most of the work I see is awful. I don’t mind Botox so much, but the over-filled lips and cheeks are grim. Add the day-glo choppers and huge, PVC brows and I feel sad. The thing is, make up is so fantastic now and the young women I know are experts in applying it - that’s all they need.
I happened to be watching The OC the other day with my friend’s daughter, who is late teens, and she couldn’t get over Mischa Barton and Rachel Bilson, who were very much seen as noughties beauties. Lots of comments about wonky teeth, pathetic brows, skinny lips. All I could see were two naturally pretty girls.
And don’t get me started on Kylie Jenner…
Finally, the trend to go abroad for the big work. So dangerous.
I am not against anybody doing whatever they wish, but I don’t think people realise that most of us look far worse than we started.
To think Leslie Ash’s lips were ridiculed and now look standard issue!

It’s made me more aware of others though and I’ve definitely looked at people and thought Botox would make a big difference to them

Wow, what an awful way to look at your fellow women.

I really like your post. An interesting post. And I agree 90%. But I’ve had to start doing some weights (at home) as my body is starting to crumble at 60 and it’s affecting my health. However it only cost me £100, as I do free videos on YouTube 😁. So there is a medical and health side sometimes (obviously nothing to do with Botox, etc )

Had to look up Zoe; does sound a ridiculous ruse!

”A starter kit for the ZOE diet costs £299.99, and membership starts at £24.99 per month”

And I agree with this too. Lots of peoples lives have been changed by weight loss injections, clinically obese people have had their health transformed. Not comparable to botox, fillers, facelifts IMO.

I also think this is driven in part by porn culture.

Porn culture currently defines what is attractive. Hence the bloated lips, vacant bloated anonymous or characterless betty boop faces, quick sexual availability, vacuousness, etc.

However, this is NOT the same as beauty (or its distant cousin style).

I didn’t get upset vibes either, just sadness that we’re living in a world where women (and to a lesser extent men) are being brainwashed into thinking they need to look like this to be attractive. And no, i don’t believe that deep down anyone really likes it, or wants to spend time and money on often painful procedures to help them feel better about themselves. We should all be questioning why we’re living like this, and why we’re letting this happen. The ramifications of what seems silly on the surface are actually awful.

Not sure I understand what you’re saying - and that’s probably me being dim, apols.

I see the aggressive use of (vain/narcissistic) self-image to get superficial needs met as controlling behaviour - self-sabotaging, whether consciously or otherwise, as it’s often informed by the self-worth/love stuff.

But that’s just my view, obvs. And this is MN, not a deep & meaningful psych thread 😆

@DissidentDaughter Well I do think in terms of deep and meaningful! Simply put, I think some are just dragged along by current trends and are too weak or lacking in awareness or individuality to resist - but others actively and aggressively pursue their narcissistic self-obsessed agenda - including those in the media and social media, influencers and so forth. They are the con-Kardashians of this world. I don’t feel sorry for them at all. PS. When I look at the media, e.g. even things like Loose Women, on a bad day you could be led to believe that all these women look completely fake: I saw Mariella Frostup in TV the other day and she just looked ridiculous – she had had all her wrinkles removed via Botox but she looked exactly the same age, only with the completely bland, featureless face of a colourless blueberry or an egg. Sorry… ranting a bit now. But they just look so fake and ridiculous. I don’t know how they think anyone is fooled; that’s what puzzles me.

How can you even tell… obviously the excessive ones but…. If you don’t know someone how do you know their lips have changed? Wouldn’t be surprised if people think I’ve had them… I never have!

While nothing can beat youth and fresh skin I understand the option for some to want to modify a part they hate, within reason.

I agree though that the trout pouts, tans, false eyelashes, huge eyebrows and other fillers look hideous! All so OTT and look the same, like a morphed clone. So sad so many do this to keep up with media beauty epitomy. No indivuality, just the bigger the better, ugh! Xx

Actually, I think you'll find there are more than just the poster 'noticing' and 'voicing' it.

My daughter is 22 and is also bothered by it. I'm in my late 40s and have never had anything done except hair removal. And an occasional pedicure.

I suppose my main concern with it is why are people so bothered by their appearance? It must all cost a fortune and surely there are better things to spend your money and focus on? I worry that the search for 'perfection' might become an unhealthy obsession. As soon as you start focusing on 'flaws' in your appearance, I wonder where it stops?

Selfishness?

It's an interesting combination of quite masculine, with the sharp features like the jaq, and overly feminine features.
I'm looking forward to when slightly soft and doughy comes back into fashion. Like anything pre 1920s.

Ridiculous answer, you’re saying everyone is entitled to an opinion but calling op out for having one!

I agree with you , we should be ashamed that our daughters and granddaughters feel the need to use fillers , have their lips swollen and other treatments to feel beautiful . My Grandaughter has beautiful eyes and doesn’t need false eyelashes , fake tan , lip fillers at 18 ! It’s because she’s insecure about her appearance but I find it so sad that she feels that way . I can only tell her she’s beautiful inside and out but it falls on deaf ears .