Badly behaved NYE guests

[achangeofusername]

This year we hosted a NYE dinner. My group of friends all have children the same age (7-13) and we've done it before - it's a nice low key celebration. I was clear on the invite that it was a sit down dinner starting at 7. When people inevitably asked what to bring I just said a bottle. One friend "Jane" texted a few days before to say her plans fell through and would it be too late to come? I said she was very welcome to.
7 came and went, everyone (except Jane) arrived and brought lovely wines, beers, flowers, champagne etc. we waited and I texted around 7.30 to see if she'd been glued up and got a "sorry we're late we won't be there til 8.30" with hungry kids and adults already drinking on empty tummies I went ahead and fed everyone. She arrived at 8.30 ish - completely empty handed. I offered to plate her, husband and children - kids had eaten and "they won't sit at a table" so she asked if they could sit and watch a film, at which point every single other child decided that they wanted to watch a film too and have dessert in the lounge... I said yes to tv, but that they'd have to come back to table when adults finished for (messy) dessert. They ate and started to drink - quite heavily. My daughter came in and told me Jane's kids had gone upstairs and had started messing round with her makeup and stuff. Her husband was sat next to me and didn't react so I excused myself and got them downstairs. They had painted themselves (2 boys) by this time.
When I called them back for dessert Jane saw them and made a comment (I'm known as being left wing) about how the "influence" of my house had caused her boys to "cross dress". I snapped at her and told her that actually they took themselves upstairs when they'd been told not to and helped themselves to my daughters make up without permission. I was told by Jane to lighten up - just a joke.
Throughout the whole evening they didn't lift a finger to help with the dishes, look in in the children etc. they both managed to get blind drunk and had forgotten to book a cab so one of my friends who can walk home ended up doing that and sacrificing her cab.
No thank you message afterwards.
AIBU to think this is poor behaviour and not invite them back?

parlour?
snug?
front room?
drawing room?

Can't expect kids to sit at a table? What nonsense.

Absolutely unacceptable- you have to say something. People like this need calling out

Either you’re a nightmare like jane or you need to set your bar much much higher.

Why? I’m just pretty relaxed and want my guests to feel relaxed too. Believe it or not we aren’t all the same

I find it more relaxing to eat at the table than to balance a plate on my knee being worried about spilling food everywhere.

Your guests feel relaxed when the ones being late and rude end up legless whilst their kids trash your house? Ok Jane. Pull the other one.

Oh give over, no one gives a crap if someone else is late to another persons house. What a reach

If it is good enough for the mansion in Cluedo...

For a sit down meal? You’re deranged.

YANBU - bin her off

Now you see why her plans fell through.

Unreasonable for using the word lounge?
Get over yourself 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

So they ended up drunk in charge of their kids ? Shocking🙄😬

It’s unreasonable to only blame Jane. Presumably her DH bares some responsibility?

Personally, I would’ve thrown them out after they messed with the make up and the outrageously rude ‘cross dressing’ comment. What cunts.

It’s very Non U to throw up over the loo. The correct thing to do is to throw up into the loo.

Seriously, you need to ask!!!?.

YANBU little monsters. Dump the friend unless she apologises profusely !

Wasn’t it the Marquis of Anglesey who liked to dress in women’s clothing and wear makeup (early 20th century).

Chalk this one up and don't invite them again.

When my 3 children were 3 they were able to sit at a table at home or away and eat nicely. My grandchildren were the same. The most their mum ever did to appease them was crayons and colouring book if it was a long wait.

YANBU...... BUT ....

Didn't this happen LAST YEAR and you were worried it would happen AGAIN this year????

You do know you could have said "No." When they asked to come.

I agree. There seems to be a whole brigade of parents that feel it’s impossible to make their children sit at a table for dinner. My brother and his wife are some of them.

They just don’t bother to encourage, speak to, entertain or involve their children round the dinner table. They can’t be arsed. They just let them get down and walk around if in someone’s home, or shove them an iPad if in a restaurant.

Absolutely depressing and infuriating and without doubt extremely lazy parenting. Children absolutely CAN sit at a table but some parents aren’t bothered about instilling that skill in them.

Hopeishere obviously has a drawing room. Perhaps even a winter drawing room. 🙄

No furthur invite or contact even in my book. Your generosity was lovely snd do not allow it to be devalued. Happy new year.