Badly behaved NYE guests

[achangeofusername]

This year we hosted a NYE dinner. My group of friends all have children the same age (7-13) and we've done it before - it's a nice low key celebration. I was clear on the invite that it was a sit down dinner starting at 7. When people inevitably asked what to bring I just said a bottle. One friend "Jane" texted a few days before to say her plans fell through and would it be too late to come? I said she was very welcome to.
7 came and went, everyone (except Jane) arrived and brought lovely wines, beers, flowers, champagne etc. we waited and I texted around 7.30 to see if she'd been glued up and got a "sorry we're late we won't be there til 8.30" with hungry kids and adults already drinking on empty tummies I went ahead and fed everyone. She arrived at 8.30 ish - completely empty handed. I offered to plate her, husband and children - kids had eaten and "they won't sit at a table" so she asked if they could sit and watch a film, at which point every single other child decided that they wanted to watch a film too and have dessert in the lounge... I said yes to tv, but that they'd have to come back to table when adults finished for (messy) dessert. They ate and started to drink - quite heavily. My daughter came in and told me Jane's kids had gone upstairs and had started messing round with her makeup and stuff. Her husband was sat next to me and didn't react so I excused myself and got them downstairs. They had painted themselves (2 boys) by this time.
When I called them back for dessert Jane saw them and made a comment (I'm known as being left wing) about how the "influence" of my house had caused her boys to "cross dress". I snapped at her and told her that actually they took themselves upstairs when they'd been told not to and helped themselves to my daughters make up without permission. I was told by Jane to lighten up - just a joke.
Throughout the whole evening they didn't lift a finger to help with the dishes, look in in the children etc. they both managed to get blind drunk and had forgotten to book a cab so one of my friends who can walk home ended up doing that and sacrificing her cab.
No thank you message afterwards.
AIBU to think this is poor behaviour and not invite them back?

Given I made the name up, this is clearly me being unreasonable 🙃

They sound like the kind of parents who come to a party and expect everyone else to parent their children or at the very least keep them safe and occupied. It’s rude, lazy and entitled.
She knew the format of the party, if he kids don’t like sitting at a table they didn’t need to come. And the fact they invited themselves last minute shows how bad mannered they are.

Same.

Quite.

If my mother told me I was sitting at a table. I was sitting at a table.

Carrying on the way these kids carried on?? My feet wouldn't have touched!

I'd be tempted to invite her back for another round, but then i am Not Nice and like cheap entertainment....

Also, i thought all the Mitford Girls were dead. How did they find this thread?

Hi Jane!

So, I've never actually priperly spent time with Mr Jane before, apart from nodding at school gates. He's always dodging the group if loads of us get together (red flag?!?!). She's been over with the children before and out for walks etc etc. evidence of this sort of late behaviour before but never so it's a problem - eg meeting for coffee when the kids were a bit younger in the hols around someone's house it's usually "rock up from 10" or whatever. Jane Boy 1&2 do have form for rowdiness.

Nope don't have them back. I had this one year. Drunk husband threw up all over my downstairs loo to cap it all.

I wouldn’t even be acquaintances with somebody this ignorant, and rude. I wouldn’t have accepted her coming over in the first place, just because her plans fell through. Why should you have to be a back up plan, and second choice? That is disrespectful enough, before she even arrived, You sound lovely op, but please don’t let people take advantage of you. I have learnt this lesson myself.

I wouldn't be having them or their children back. Ever. Rude as.

Kids who won’t sit at the table….. nope not at that age, sit at the table or don’t eat -simple

Me too, we also asked permission to leave the table. If we had eaten enough, than dm would allow it. This was the 90s though, before iPads and phones, and constant entertainment. You learnt to eat your dinner in a timely manner , and then you could go play!

Entitled, arrogant, selfish, rude, all round cunty behaviour from Jane and family.

Phase her out. Don't keep wankers like this in your life. Pleasantries only.

I agree.
Their all round behaviour was rude.
When they text to say it would be 8.30 that would be when you say, best to leave it.
You have allowed yourself and your home to be spectacularly disrespected by the dregs.
You need to look at your boundaries that you have accepted that.
I don't know people who behave like that, nor anyone who would tolerate it for a minute.
They are the dregs.

Because she's read that ''lounge'' is supposedly naff, and that one is meant to use the term ''Sitting room''.

@achangeofusername Someone being that late? Appallingly rude, especially as they were turning up mob handed with their poorly~ socialised kids.

Being hungry and waiting for dinner - never mind being the cook!- is annoying, as stuff will have been timed.

Add in alcohol, and it's a no no.

There was a thread on here where someone had found vomot on an expensive sofa {Feather filled upholstery}..I went to a Millennium Party where a child puked bright pink sick on an expensive white carpet.. in an area of the house she shouldn't have been in. The hosts were not best pleased.

Imagine having children that can't sit at a table to eat.

Probably a parent or parents who park on double yellow lines, claim their children are angels if accused of misbehaviour at school (add other things).

Never invite them back.

I think we all know why Mr. and Mrs. Jane's plans "fell through," and they will most likely spend NYE alone next year!

I certainly wouldn't be inviting them again!

They RSVP late

The turn up late

No gift for the host

Don't watch their kids

Don't help with dishes/helping to tidy

Kids destroy your kid's makeup

Sly comments from parents

Get totally pissed with kids in tow

Don't arrange how to get home

No thanks after

Of course you invite them again 😱😂

Of course you can.

"You can't have any food unless you sit at the table to eat it". I never found it difficult to ask children to eat at the table.

One or two of those things would be annoying but altogether definitely tips them into bin category

She wouldn't be invited ever again. Total rudeness

Don't invite them again.
It's perfectly fair to ask children to sit at the table to eat.
When they hop down, they leave the food at the table.
No reason to be eating or drinking any where else.

With sleepy, excited children I would have had a zone for them where they were quite close to the food but able to rest watching someTV, playing cards or talking.