Should she replace it?

[Langarg]

My friend asked if she could borrow my Dyson airwrap for her wedding as money was tight and she couldn’t afford a hairdresser. It was a small wedding with only her, her DH and two witnesses. I reluctantly agreed (bit of a people pleaser).

The wedding was two weeks ago, we exchanged a few messages back and forth the day after her wedding. A few days later I asked if she could please return my airwrap and she didn’t reply. I messaged again saying I really need it back as I don’t have a hair dryer anymore and solely use this to dry/style my hair and she eventually replied saying she accidentally left it in the hotel however the hotel are claiming it wasn’t left there.

She was very apologetic however didn’t offer to replace it or give me the money for it. I raised this with her and explained that I shouldn’t be left without my airwrap or out of pocket for her mistake and she said that she couldn’t afford to replace or give me the money for it. She then sent me a link to a post on Facebook marketplace of someone selling an older model for £150 and said that if I buy that she can pay me back in 3 monthly instalments.

I don’t want to accept this because firstly why should I be out of pocket £150 and risk not being paid back and I don’t want an older model when I had the newer one which cost me nearly £500 less than a year ago.

I explained this to her and she said she is going to be forced to put a brand new one on her credit card which will put her in to debt. I feel awful but I really don’t know what to do?!

Please give me some advice…

YABU = buy the £150 older model and hope she pays the 3 monthly instalments
YANBU = accept her offer of her buying a replacement on her credit card

Not buying her story at all OP.

Cheeky cow!
Like, she's unbelievable.

Send her the link to a brand new one that is the same model as the one she lost. If it has to go on her credit card then so be it. You do not have to accept someone’s skanky old air wrap from Facebook marketplace.

Oh and next time say no, especially with things that you cannot easily afford to replace, never a borrower or lender be……….

She won't be insured as it didn't belong to her. You can only insure your own property. Fairly sure this would be the answer from the insurance company

Gosh what a cheeky cow.

What a cheeky mare!!! I certainly wouldn't be accepting a cheaper, older model and I wouldn't care less if she had to put the cost on her credit card!
I wonder if she's kept it for herself and is hoping you'll overlook it. It would be interesting to see if it magically turns up if you absolutely insist on an equal replacement?!
"Oh sorry Langarg, it was in my bag all along. Silly me!'

This is awful and I do not think you’re being unreasonable. I echo others in suggesting you phone the hotel and query it with them.

I would also send her a firm message explaining how much money she owes you and the time frame, I wouldn’t accept a second hand one or an older model.

Part of me thinks she’s kept it for herself, seems strange to just forget that one thing, did she forget anything else?

She’s still got it.

You need to get £500 off her.

And then get shot of her for good.

Good luck.

First of all, you owe no one an explanation of why you bought a £500 item. That’s your business. Plenty of things including holidays, pets and children cost money and you dont have to justify these.

secondly - she owes you a new item. Your warranty is now invalidated and Dysons are long lasting but buying a second hand one you will not know how old it is and it could do kaput at any time.

she does not sound like a good friend so if she gets the hump so be it!

I was going to suggest you ring the hotel also - if a £500 piece of anything went missing, there'd be an investigation surely...

I actually think I would email the manager, not to complain, but to make sure it gets seen by someone higher up - dont be fobbed off by someone behind the reception desk

Having a Google - most airwraps are on sale for £400 at the moment. Def ask her for £400 and order new one

That’s if she DID forget it. A £500 newest model is much better than an older £150 one so she wins if she doesn’t get you the same model. I think you should really stick to your guns OP. You hadn’t had it that long - the one on FB will be years older as it’s an old model. Nothing wrong in insisting on the same model she replaces it with, could be 2nd hand as long as it’s in a suitable condition. She absolutely should replace it tho - it’ll be a valuable lesson for her - it wasn’t a wedding present - which presumably you’ve already bought her!

Sounds like she expects preferential treatment bc you’ve always made allowances for her and she’s still in bridezilla mode

She 100% needs to replace it with a new one.

I also dont buy her story...

That was my first thought too. I figured she took the opportunity to own a brand-new item and take the OP for a mug who would just "let it go". Now she's playing the "guilt trip" scenario, hoping to get away with it.

OP--tell her she has to replace it with the exact same model. Then dump her as she isn't a worthy friend.

I would simply send her a link to a replacement and ask her to get it delivered to your address by the end of the week. Her struggle to pay for it is not your problem.

If you borrow an expensive item from a friend you take care of it. You should not be expected to be out of pocket because your friend is dishonest careless.

I wouldn't accept 2nd hand stuff - she needs to cough up

Slightly different but I have a Dyson hairdryer and love it - if it went missing/broke I would replace it straight away - better than its parlux predecessor or any other hairdryer I've ever had. I use it everyday and it was bought during lockdown.

This isn't difficult

She says: "I have unfortunately left it at the hotel and they say they don't have it. If I replace it I will have to put it on the credit card and will be in debt"

Your response should be "Thank you, I appreciate you accepting responsibility and paying me back quickly. If you could drop it in by Tuesday afternoon that would be great since I'm going out and I need it by then"

Don't let CFs guilt trip you

If someone said they'd buy me a £150 Dyson off of FB to replace I'd laugh in their face. An older model and wouldn't know if it even worked properly?
Caveat for a start and there is no way I'm going to be out of a pocket because of some cfer.
I am not a people pleaser, too many people are ready to take the piss.

I imagine she has money outstanding for wedding costs so probably already has credit card debt.
it was a gamble lending it to her.
i have one as well and it’s made such a difference to the look of my fine limp hair. Worth every penny.

Just a thought…have you registered it on the Dyson website? See if the warranty has been “transferred”

I wonder if this will get picked up by the press and force her into sorting the issue - can you name the hotel @Langarg incase it helps

I’m also team stole it/sold it but thought maybe I was being cynical until I saw others thinking the same!

I am also team stole it, cheeky woman.