Should she replace it?

[Langarg]

My friend asked if she could borrow my Dyson airwrap for her wedding as money was tight and she couldn’t afford a hairdresser. It was a small wedding with only her, her DH and two witnesses. I reluctantly agreed (bit of a people pleaser).

The wedding was two weeks ago, we exchanged a few messages back and forth the day after her wedding. A few days later I asked if she could please return my airwrap and she didn’t reply. I messaged again saying I really need it back as I don’t have a hair dryer anymore and solely use this to dry/style my hair and she eventually replied saying she accidentally left it in the hotel however the hotel are claiming it wasn’t left there.

She was very apologetic however didn’t offer to replace it or give me the money for it. I raised this with her and explained that I shouldn’t be left without my airwrap or out of pocket for her mistake and she said that she couldn’t afford to replace or give me the money for it. She then sent me a link to a post on Facebook marketplace of someone selling an older model for £150 and said that if I buy that she can pay me back in 3 monthly instalments.

I don’t want to accept this because firstly why should I be out of pocket £150 and risk not being paid back and I don’t want an older model when I had the newer one which cost me nearly £500 less than a year ago.

I explained this to her and she said she is going to be forced to put a brand new one on her credit card which will put her in to debt. I feel awful but I really don’t know what to do?!

Please give me some advice…

YABU = buy the £150 older model and hope she pays the 3 monthly instalments
YANBU = accept her offer of her buying a replacement on her credit card

If she buys the item herself, I think the warranty will be in her name, won’t it? Might be best to request that she transfers the money into your account, so you can have complete control over what you buy AND get the warranty in your name.
“This has been dragging on for too long now, so let’s resolve it now. I need the AirWrap ASAP and will be buying it myself. I’d like the money transferred into my bank account - here are the account details - by Friday 3rd. I really don’t want to have to go down the Small Claims route. In the meantime I’ll have a chat today with the hotel manager just to double-check that it hasn’t now been found”.
Good luck and hopefully it will be ‘found’ very soon.

“Tricky one”??! How is this a tricky one?! The air wrap was loaned then lost there’s nothing tricky about it it needs replacing and not with an old second hand one either!

Transfer wouldn't really work if friend has to use a credit card. Am I missing something?

I would agree. Plus, why should the OP "compromise" on any aspect of this?
She kindly loaned an expensive item and hasn't got it back. It's very clear. The woman returns it, or transfers the money for a replacement.

Yes, you can link a credit card to a PayPal account.

Absolutely not acceptable. My first thought was she's kept it for herself or sold it.
Either way, she needs to buy you a new one through whatever means she can - Klarna, Very, credit card and take the hit - that is not your fault!
On another note, I'd be reevaluating the friendship after this.

As you know this should have been sorted out immediately on her return. It’s not something that you were just going to forget you had loaned her and do without going forward.

Whatever the truth is she should have returned it or replaced it without any of this ridiculous behaviour. It’s completely unacceptable.

Oh boy she is rude. It all sounds off doesn't it, particularly that she didn't own up that they'd been "forgotten" and wanted to wriggle out of it by getting you a cheap replacement. Can't wait to hear what happens on the 2nd!

The OP has already posted that she has

Loads of people are selling unwanted Dysons on vinted to get the cash, have you checked yours is not up for sale by her? She can always open a very account and take advantage of the new customer 20% welcome discount code and order you new and pay in 3. Get her to replace with new or buy you the exact same model if you allow her to replace using secondhand.

She should get into debt to replace.

Just tell her to order a new one and claim on her house insurance if it is really lost.

Just jumping on to say you want a new Dyson air wrap asap. She’s being such a cheeky bitch but then also thinking you’ll believe her lies for having left it at the hotel. I’d struggle to maintain a friendship going forward too or at least would dial it down.

I would get back onto the hotel and confirm it as you intend to involve the police.

I would also send that text so you have proof because I would also consider The Small Claims Court.

You know she has zero integrity yet you gave her such a valuable item.
So foolish.
I really hope you learn from this.

Does OP’s friend really not have savings lying around or able to get hold of?

You do need to keep all the texts around this as you may need to go down the small claims route.

If anything has been said over the phone confirm it in a text/ email so you have everything in writing.

Yes of course. She needs to return or replace it. It’s not the OP’s problem if she has to go into debt. She should’ve taken more care.

Perhaps you could start a crowd funder? We all know it's not lost. The CF was trying for a freebie.

She’s not much of a friend and yes, she should be paying to replace with a brand new one.

You need to back away (once she’s replaced the hairdryer). Friends don’t pull this kind of shit.

Can you claim on your insurance? If so, she pays the excess. If not, she has to replace it; it was in her care.

Looking forward to the news of the miraculous “finding” on the 2nd!! Fingers crossed for you OP 🤞

She should abso.utely replace it. By using her credit card if necessary. Leaving behind a valuable thing belonging to someone else is just unforgivable. In your shoes I’d be wondering if that was actually what happened.

The excess AND any subsequent increase in premium at renewal due to the claim. That's where it could get even messier though as this STBEx friend will no doubt think that's petty.

I'd be inclined to go round to her house, tell her you know she is bullshitting you about the hotel and to hand over your Dyson now. If she refuses, then refuse to leave until she has ordered a brand new replacement, in front of you, to be delivered to your address, or she transfers £500.00 to your account.

She is an utter cunt.

But it isn't petty, she can think what she likes. I doubt the friendship will continue.