To think DP is being used by so called "friend"

[Queenjuliana]

Apologies for the long post, it takes a bit of explaining....DP has a friend who lives in Germany with his partner. DP and friend have known each other since childhood, went to school together etc. They are only in contact via social media, mainly to talk about football and reminisce about the old days. From what I can gather, the friend leads an "alternative" lifestyle. They don't have proper jobs, they smoke dope, and are self described "anarchists" ( whatever that is!) The friend's wife has recently been diagnosed with breast cancer. The friend has asked my partner to set up a Go Fund me page to raise money for her. The target is £9000. Apparently he does not want to do this himself because the money cannot be traceable to him. After lots of questioning to a very defensive DP, this is what I've managed to surmise..She is getting free health care treatment in Germany for her cancer. But due to the cancer she cannot work (cleaning job I believe) So they want the funds for living expenses. Germany of course have a sickness benefit which can be claimed but I'm assuming they haven't paid anything into the scheme as they are not eligible. So why am I resentful of this kind act my DP is doing? This friend has history of coming to DP when he needs money. DP is a soft touch, very kindhearted and an easy target. He talked him into "investing" £500 in the past to some hare brained music company he was supposedly setting up. Obviously the money was never seen again. Also, why can't the friend support his own wife? I personally can't see why he expects other people to donate to their living expenses because he hasn't bothered to get a decent job, and because they haven't paid into the health insurance scheme over there. The collection is going well and they have got to £7000. On top of this, because the money has to be untraceable, the friend has to have it in cash so DP has agreed to fly to Germany with it!! I know it's not my business but it all sounds so dodgy and underhand. I have every sympathy for her cancer diagnosis but she is getting well cared for and her prognosis is good as caught early. I'm pretty sure the friend would not be doing the same for DP if the roles were reversed. AIBU to think DP is being taken for a mug and this whole thing sounds like a scam?

So, at best, by handing over cash he has no evidence that the money he has collected didn't just go straight into his own pocket. One complaint by a donor, he's investigated, and potentially done for fraud.

At worst, it's something like money laundering.

If he won't listen to sense though, I don't know what you can do
Just make sure your own hands are clean.

Or I wonder if you should get him to contact Just Giving to ask them for advice on records required when passing funds on.

I'd be so furious with him.

Surely it s not as simple as that? If there is benefit fraud being committed (entirely possible) and/or the money has been collected under false pretences because the partner isn't actually ill, then is there not a danger that op s dp is laundering money which is a criminal offence?

Proper Dodgy!

If he's still not listening to you OP perhaps show him this thread. Lots of people here are agreeing with you so maybe if he sees that, it might make him think. Well, it should do anyway!

I thought too, that people are buying drugs from the friend and they are paying via go fund me. Possibly because the police are keeping an eye on friend.

The wife may well have cancer, but I think this is a convenient excuse for nefarious goings on.

Has the 7k come in from lots of people, in dribs and drabs or has it been significant, rounded chunks @Queenjuliana ? Anonymous or named donors?

If your DH has read GFM's T&C he clearly must realise the situation he's placing himself in re: tax and disclosures and responsibilities and as he's had to give a bank account, NI number, passport details and UK phone and address, he's tagged already.

The question is, could you be impacted in any of this? Joint bank account? Your address too? Oh and another q: who is reimbursing him for German Mule Trip? He's not taking this out of the proceeds, is he?

I don't need to tell you this as as dodgy as hell. Personally, DH or not, I'd be reporting the campaign to GFM. You can do that anonymously, whether you are a donor or not.

I'd be concerned that:

• the money donated may actually be a cover for something
• the people donating may not be clear what it's going to, and that will cause problems later if your DP is seen as the organiser
• if it genuinely has to be in cash and untraceable, it sounds like it's illegal in Germany and your DP could get in trouble

I used to live in Germany and know a bit, not everything, about the social welfare systems. This sounds really dodgy to me for all the reasons pp have listed.

Donations from fellow anarchists sounds like some sort of money laundering scheme to me.
Your DH should tread VERY carefully.

OP, thankfully you are not married.

He's a gullible moron, which is so u attractive.
His "loyalty" is to some user which is confirmation of how dim he is.

Protect yourself and rethink how much you really want to be attached to such poor judgment.

But surely OP can look at the fundraiser and see if the money is from genuine friends and family of the couple? It's perfectly possible that the poor women does have cancer and on a low income, and that people who KNOW her are chipping in to give support. It's possible the cancer is all just a fake story, but how often do random strangers give to a crowdfunder like this for such an unthreatening illness for someone in a wealthy country? It just makes me think the donors are people who want to help and trust the couple. I would never have let my DP set up something like this, but there has to be an element of trust that he knows his friend and knows the donations aren't from people being mugged.

"The money has to be untraceable" eh? That shrieks "scam" and if he's taking money from other people then your husband has been sucked in to being the scammer. Scams often operate on multiple levels with one scammer dragging other people in.

Though I wonder if your husband has been sucked in to a money laundering scam? He has been asked by his "friend" to carry a sum of cash into Germany which is just under the legal limit. It wouldn't be a surprise if his "friend" was asking a lot of other people to do the same.

donations from friends, plus other anarchists who follow their music - they put on anarchists gigs and it seems they are quite well known on this scene

Your husband should wonder exactly who is paying in to this GoFundMe. Medical crowdfunders don't usually raise much and people living alternative lifestyles who earn money from DJing can't afford to put vast sums of money into crowdfunders. Well not unless they're doing something extremely dodgy on the side.

Dp is named on gofundme as the organiser

Silly sod. Oh well, here's hoping it all goes OK and he doesn't get asked to do anything more stupid afterwards. Or blackmailed into it.

Can he name a single legal reason for someone needing that quantity of untraceable money?

Does he know what the 'tax reasons' are preventing others from doing this? And if they apply to every other friend and family member, why don't they apply to him?

Does he understand that, if things go south, he has no way to prove that he didn't raise the money on false pretences, or to prove that he didn't hand it over?The paper trail will say he still has it.

It's clearly something illegal.

Personally I couldn't be with someone with such low moral standards. And if I could overlook that aspect, I certainly couldn't be with someone so utterly stupid.

And has he even thought through withdrawing that much money in cash. The banks don't just let you walk in and take it. There are money laundering checks to get through.

He's going to have so many flags attached to all his future accounts he'll have trouble buying anything larger than a coffee.

The cancer is pretty irrelevant, to be honest. GFM can help you crowd fund for any number of reasons. Major illness or "just because". What do they care, after all - they get their fee-per-donation.

The Op's DH has started a page for his chosen cause - this couple in Germany. He (DH) is not obligated to pay back donors or give them anything else in return for their contributions.

The big issue is that the couple (who have conceived this idea) demand non-traceable cash only. Nothing to hit their bank accounts. The couple are not putting themselves at risk for this - it's all on the DH who will be transferring a significant amount of money to his bank account and cashing it out before carrying the lump sum to Germany.

What nationalities are the couple @Queenjuliana ? Did you say both are german passport holders?

Lol.
Anarchists, until they realise what the State can do (or not do) for them.
Reap what you sow isn’t it.

He’s claiming “nothing illegal”. It’s money laundering. The recipient knows where the money is coming from, all from people he knows, who for some reason can’t give the money direct, so it needs to go through the go fund me page (the cleaning process). Wouldn’t set up the go fund me himself as it would link the laundering directly to him, so is putting it through another person. Your partner has put himself right in the middle of the illegal part. & he’s the only traceable one.
The authorities most definitely track go fund me type pages, but whether they flag up things under £10k, only they know.

If he insists on going ahead, I'd make sure I had no financial link with him. No joint accounts, credit cards, leases.....

At the very best if there's a complaint investigation the husband will have to repay the 9k to the donors himself.

It's like those drug mules who stupidly carry drugs only the once for a friend who wind up in trouble with the police. The terrorism laws will cover someone carrying cash abroad as well. Hasn't he seen the news from Germany recently.

If they're genuine friends and family, they can give directly. No crowfunder needed.

Exactly this. Your husband could end up looking like he is ripping people off.

I wouldn't touch this with someone else's bargepole!

It is sad how your DP will spend so much time and money setting all this up and going over there with the money, but get narky and wont discuss it properly with you. Who is the priority with him? Not you and your view, sadly.

At the very least, the guy should hop on an easy jet flight & collect.
Your Partner, (& I sincerely hope he isn't your Husband ?) could be assisting funding all sort or anarchist terroism, black block, arms, drugs.
& my then be taxed for it.
What happens to you if he goes to jail ?
What if you are considered in some way accomplice ?
What a Tosser. Honestly I would want nothing more to do with him

You’re right! But apparently they can still refund (I thought it was automatic) so at least it wouldn’t be lost.

Refunding your donors
If you’ve raised funds that are no longer needed and haven’t transferred them to your bank yet, you can refund your donors. This action is irreversible, so please be sure you truly wish to refund your donors before moving forward with the request. Your donors will receive their funds back in an average of 7-10 business days (weekends and holidays excluded).

could be assisting funding all sort or anarchist terroism, black block, arms,

He’s probably just funding a couple of lazy addicts we are trying to swerve the system. When was the last time Germany had any violence/arms related that are linked to Anarchism? Probably evicting squatters at best.

Still crazy to get involved though.

Has your DP ever been narky, uncommunicative, so very insistent about anything else since you've been together? It's one thing if this is his usual way of going about things, but if it's completely out of character, I would be worried that he does, in fact, know it's something dodgy he's got himself mixed up in and he is afraid because he can't see a way out.