Shared disability toilets with baby changing facilities

[MobilityCat]

Yesterday, I found myself in an embarrassing and upsetting situation when I crapped myself while waiting outside the disabled toilet. A mum was inside, chatting and cooing to her baby while changing its nappy. While I completely understand that she needed a suitable place to change her baby, I couldn’t help but wonder: why does it have to be in the one facility specifically designed for the disabled? Why can't the baby changing facilities be located in the women's toilet or have a separate dedicated room for this purpose?

Oh no doubt.

Been on here 6 years myself.

I'm just noticing a trend this week.

I can't help how you see me and I apologise for appearing to be intentionally unkind to other women, sometimes I just need a good rant to deal with stuff. Posting my issues on YANBU helps me to get other peoples opinions on a situation how reasonable the situation is. Or isn't.

You don't know that she didn't, could have been a poo blowout, my kids have had some brutal ones that have required full outfit changes and in winter that's a lot of layers. The baby and mum are just as entitled to that space as the Op in this instance, it's the venue who should be providing separate spaces

It’s because of space.

Im really sorry that happened to you OP x

I don’t think it’s reasonable to only have a public space to change a baby. A child in nappies is just as entitled to privacy as you.

Agreed plus my baby is quite scared of the hand dryer so when the baby change is in a separate room it avoids him having a meltdown. Babies are humans with needs too, they shouldn’t always be second class citizens either.

A person can also apply via their local Council for a BB. They can be awarded without being in receipt of PIP, as well.

Where did I say this had to be a public space? …wait… I didn’t write that.

I just find it sad how many people can't imagine that this supermarket, which presumably had multiple loos for men and women and then one accessible loo which was shared for a baby change couldn't in have arranged these facilities differently. Supermarkets tend to be big.

It seems odd that disabled people who are more likely to suffer from urgency and more likely take a long time themselves, have to share with another group that also takes a long time. It makes more sense for able bodied people do be inconvenienced by having fewer urinals/cubicals and to have two accessible spaces.

I know small cafes can't do this as they are small. But they aren't really public loos. But so many proper public toilet are like this. My town spent a fortune on new public toilets and it's still one accessible loo

Everytime I take my aunt to the disabled loo there is a queue and the able bodied toilets are half empty.

That's fine, as long as it’s not marked up as a disabled loo. But the point being you can't do both at once, you go to the loo and then change the baby (or the other way around). Someone else could be using the loo whilst you are changing the baby on a separate area. We all know that you could have a quick nappy change or you could have a poonarmi and be in there ages!

There's more options for where baby changes can go in a building as they don't need the toilet plumbing.

My Mum is in a wheelchair and has an advanced Parkinsonism, sadly she’s not able to change nappies. She also couldn’t push the pram, nor can I when I'm pushing her so I need to wear my baby and juggle them both.

When I say disabled toilet I am referring to people in a wheelchair, thankfully accessible loos are becoming more common with higher toilet and grab rails etc in standard cubicles which again is more helpful. Disabled loos are larger to accommodate wheelchairs and have the grab rails etc.

Can you not cope with the fact that it was an accessible toilet, not only a disabled one, because the baby change was in the toilet.

@LadyKenya

A person can also apply via their local Council for a BB. They can be awarded without being in receipt of PIP, as well

I know that, but the comment I replied to was about the automatic entitlement to a BB with PIP - not about BB application in general.

Well clearly the op didn't cope. She soiled herself. Which is rather the point. People can't cope with this arrangement.

Able bodied people had multiple cubicles in this venue. The disabled person had one, which she had to share with another type of user, with both users types taking loger than average and more likely to have urgency issues. It's a conflict by poor design, not necessity.

Ffs Mumsnet, why do you do this?
I didn't report this post, I prefer personal attacks against me to stand and not be deleted. I'm not a delicate flower who'll cry if someone calls me names, you don't need to protect me, I can stand up for myself.

I didn't see the post you're referring to but that's not how forums work.

If something is against talk guidelines and the moderators are aware of it, they'll delete it 🤷‍♂️

Next time it could be been another disabled person rather than a mother so you'd be in the same predicament.

Obviously space is limited so it makes perfect sense to combine facilities.

Reading comprehension please. I was responding to the commenter who said people 'couldn't cope' with disabled toilets being for disabled people, when clearly they were not only disabled toilets, they were also the baby change facilities. If that is inappropriate use of space then that is on the building, not on people who have to use the space as intended.

@hazelnutvanillalatte

If that is inappropriate use of space then that is on the building, not on people who have to use the space as intended.

That really is the whole point OP is making by putting up the thread.

I know. For the second time I was replying to the message that I quoted in my post...

@hazelnutvanillalatte You can't have read my message very closely if you think my issue is with the specific mother mentioned in the OP. As I said very clearly, what I have a problem with is not that individual person, but people on Mumsnet who resent disabled people and do not acknowledge that disabled toilets exist because of us and for us. They are "accessible" toilets only secondarily, and while I agree that it's not an inappropriate use of space for parents to use them when that is the only place with a changing facility (although it shouldn't be), the entire discourse around it on this site is not only ableist but actively hateful as disabled people keep pointing out on the multiple threads about it.

@hazelnutvanillalatte Such as for example the commenter who said that this situation (OP's) doesn't "matter", when we can all be pretty certain that if the commenter was prevented from going to the loo and soiled herself in public, she'd think it mattered, all right,

She wasn't prevented from going to the loo. She just had to wait. We all have to wait when there is a queue.