To feel like people assume if you're wealthy, successful etc people assume you can't have problems?

[MyLilacGoose]

I had a very challenging childhood, NC with parents, suffer from depression for which I take medication for. Most people will respond to this with sympathy and kindness if they don't know anything else.

If people know I'm an attractive multimillionaire who married another attractive multimillionaire? Entitled, detached, you have no real problems etc. They don't always say it to your face but they regularly say it behind your back, and they don't realise they are no less privileged if they compare themselves to those in the developing world i.e. most people.

One of my closest friends is even wealthier but came from a very elite background and had it far worse yet gets even less sympathy because she was born rich and she obviously isn't going to go around explaining the painful details. You can tell it bothers her as well.

AIBU?
Edit: sorry about the poorly worded title.

Even with health though for most people not smoking, exercising 3x a week and maintaining a healthy weight will do far more for you than the best private hospitals/doctors ever could.

I don’t believe that, loads of people do all the right things & get cancer or genetics makes them more susceptible to high blood pressure etc. Having access to quick and good treatment makes a huge difference. Health is very often linked to wealth, why else do some of the poorer areas have much lower life expectancy’s?

The amount of money you are talking about it protects people from a lot of hardships but doesn’t cocoon them from every trial in life.

I also think a lot of money can cause its own problems. These problems the ordinary person in the street may not be aware of.

However, would I rather be wealthy with issues or poor with issues? I Know which I would choose.

Who do you want sympathy from and why are you bothered? Why the need to have your suffering acknowledged? It won't change anything for you.

There are times in my life where I have had plenty of money and times when I have been on the bones of my arse. Having money is a much better situation. It doesn't mean you don't have problems but essentially you have the resources to buy your way out of most of them. It also removes what is a huge worry for lots and lots of people which is simply not having enough money. Being rich doesn't make people happy but generally it makes people less miserable.

Trying having those MH problems with no money and being dependent on the near non existant care available on the NHS for MH. If single and unable to work there is a good chance you will also end up homeless and with shocking physical health problems. Either way your life chances and often those of your family will be impaired.

I group up dirt poor. Spent half my childhood in the Brompton's weekly paediatric chest clinics along with half the children in my school due to damp, overcrowded and poor quality housing. As well as being left with impaired physical health and interrupted education many were left with life long mental health problems as a consequence of living in poverty. My parents worked their arses off to get us out of that housing but it took many years and some luck. Many of my friends were less fortunate.

I made money and am now wealthy and I've not had a trouble free life by any means. I know exactly where I'm better off. We were able to provide well for our DC and access help and care when needed which was simply not available without money.

It is a fact that whatever your problems money gives you choices and a degree of control over your life to improve things. You may not be "cured" but the illness is a lot more bearable, not least because you can better insulate your family from the consequences.

I don't think op is minimising that it's not as bad for those who don't have money, just that she deserves compassion and empathy too. Which she does.

Well in my opinion this is why birds of a feather flock together.

We know fame and fortune don’t buy happiness, look at all the drug and alcohol problems, premature deaths and suicides among the rich and famous. But you can’t expect sympathy from people who don’t share your situation.

Hollywood stars hang together. As do British celebs, the aristocracy, and those who are just fortunate to have lots of money.

You and your friend have found each other and can give each other sympathy. But don’t go expecting it from others from vastly different circumstances. I don’t go moaning to the homeless guy on the street about how annoying my boss is. Know your audience and have some self-awareness.

Yeah I think the thing is that poor people can have all the problems rich people fo plus an additional heap more, due to living in poverty or even just not being able to make life easier for themselves if it costs money to do so. So it's not that rich people don't have problems, it's that poor people have the same problems and being poor on top.

It's like when people minimise getting a six-figure inheritance and say 'well I'd rather they were still here than have all this money', but all the people who lost a loved one and received nothing also wish their loved one were here, they just weren't lucky enough to come out of it with six figures (and I say this as someone who has benefited from a large inheritance).

It's about difficulties on top of difficulties.

But no one has exactly the same difficulties. Sure in a hypothetical world where 2 people with exactly the same difficulties the rich one will be better off (and deserving of less sympathy according to people on here)

But in the real world no two people are the same. So poor person might have lost their parent whereas rich person has lost their only child. To weirdly limit the amount of sympathy to rich person because they have more money is frankly fucked up.

Even if it was the same event the idea that rich person is grieving less at the death of a parent because they can afford a new coat over poor person is equally fucked up