DH is a Freemason and it makes me cringe

[YerJokin]

He takes it so seriously. He's always gone through hobby phases but he's done this for years now and takes it very seriously. He's currently on the phone discussing 'Bretheryn' and it gives me the major ick, I actually want to cry listening to it.

I've tried to stand by him as he takes it so seriously so i attend events and smile encouragingly but I can't bear it. Never knew when I married him that he wanted to do this. It's not the worst thing he could do of course but it's an old boys club and we're only in our 30s!

He has lots of friends and other hobbies so it's not even his only social outlet, no idea why he needs this in his life and treats it like a second job.

The only mason who would end up in prison is a mason who has betrayed his brethren, and is being punished for it. They do not hesitate to punish one another for rebelling.
Loyal masons will not go down for crimes they have committed. Many violent and psychopathic policemen walk free from the courts even though they have committed heinous crimes. Many in the court system, media, and government are freemasons, and they have each other's backs.

rubbish freemasonry is non religious
freemasonry is all over the world with different faiths japan korea etc . Freemasons have to believe in a supreme being.
plenty of Roman Catholics are Freemasons. There are also ladies who have their own lodges

It would give me the ick too. My husband was asked to go along but he declined the invitation, the whole thing seems like a cult not to mention so sexist

Much as in any organisation made up of men in positions of authority (see: the church, the scouts, boarding schools, etc) one wonders the extent to which they have protected one another when inevitable allegations have been made by women and children regarding abuse by some of their members. I hope there’s an undercover journalist in their midst as we speak.

Ick. So small minded. LTB.

Are women allowed to join now? Just out of interest. I sort of find the whole secrecy part of it intriguing but no hardly anything about it however I have also heard that they do a lot for charity.

They have women only lodges, but there aren’t as many.

https://www.sky.com/watch/title/series/a6cfecbe-9358-4f2e-a141-a2e7a28e7778/inside-the-freemasons

I don't think it's as exciting as some here are making out.😂
It's a little sad how some women want to have complete control over what their other halves do in their down time.

If it is all above board then why the secrecy.

Both my Dad and an ex boyfriend were approached to join in the past but it was the secrecy that put them both off. Didn't know what they would be walking into.

I did.
Posted up thread from their own website
Most of the giving back is back to their own 80% in fact

They also give to the Masons, thus avoiding tax on their earnings, the money is then given back to pay for private schooling. ( that’s a legal tax loophole ). This used to be in dedicated Masonic schools, I have no idea how many of those still exist but there was a girls and a boys Masonic school near me when I was growing up .

I agree. An awful lot of ignorance going around!
PP, I dare say there are some things about you that makes your husband ‘cringe’.

I've been to a fair few Masonic do's and they are really quite strange, oddly awkward and like something out of hot fuzz.

The ridiculous sexism is off the scale and don't even get me started on the ceremonial clothing and rituals.

It's like some kind of large scale prank being played on unsuspecting men who all fall for this and have no idea how bloody ridiculous they look/spund.

Who said women want to control what men do in their down time?

If women don’t find it attractive - wearing aprons, attending ceremonies and sharing secrets then that’s fair enough. It’s all a bit Brownies for me.

You should see the Catholic Churches thoughts on Freemasonry
Its a no from them

The women who are telling their partners that if they join it will be the end for them. Multiple reports of this on this thread.
No doubt if it were the men making these demands there would be a different reaction on here.

I think most people are being tongue in cheek. Although I would be perturbed if my DH suddenly announced he was a member.

I just can't get worked up about someone's hobbies unless they become obsessive. Seems pretty harmless to me and most of the negative comments on this thread are third-hand evidence and 'I've heard this rumour....' type statements which don't add much to the debate.

It's a different question as to whether there should be men-only or women-only clubs.

I have read the papal Bull regarding Roman Catholics joining Freemasons which is over a one hundred years old. But as the Roman Catholic religion has nothing to do with Freemasons if means nothing as I said there are plenty of members of numerous religions

My late husband was in it for years. As far as I can see it's just a load of blokes doing an odd ritual and then eating a pretty boring meal. He said it wasn't an old boys network, no one he knew got a better job or work due to the connections. I think some blokes just like the sort of schoolboy stuff. It always reminded me of a sort of 1950s public school type thing.
I was asked to join the lady masons and declined, it just didn't appeal.
Edited to say I never went to ladies nights either.

I wasn’t. It was a dealbreaker for me. Clearly he didn’t feel particularly strongly about it because he stopped being a Mason - his choice. If he’d stayed we’d have broken up. It wouldn’t have been too hard three months into the relationship.

What were your reasons for it being a dealbreaker? The secrecy and undertones of misogyny would be my main concerns, but I don’t know much about the organisation.

the same could be said about why people go to church etc if they enjoy it then why not ?

I'm glad it's not just me. I can't bear that saying and lose any sympathy for anyone who uses it.

but where is the misogyny ?

Very true. A friend of mine's late father was a member of a lodge. When he died, they dictated a whole load of 'rules' she had to follow for his funeral and wake to ensure that it afforded the lodge the appropriate respect and standing. And she had to fund it all, as well as make a donation to them. They didn't cough up anything.

My dad was invited to join them by his boss. He hated the whole thing with a passion and so politely declined. He was then subjected to horrific bullying to the point whereby he had to change his job. No way was I going to be with a man who was a Freemason after that. It would have felt like a betrayal