DH is a Freemason and it makes me cringe

[YerJokin]

He takes it so seriously. He's always gone through hobby phases but he's done this for years now and takes it very seriously. He's currently on the phone discussing 'Bretheryn' and it gives me the major ick, I actually want to cry listening to it.

I've tried to stand by him as he takes it so seriously so i attend events and smile encouragingly but I can't bear it. Never knew when I married him that he wanted to do this. It's not the worst thing he could do of course but it's an old boys club and we're only in our 30s!

He has lots of friends and other hobbies so it's not even his only social outlet, no idea why he needs this in his life and treats it like a second job.

repeating the same thing would point out that what they are saying is the truth,

They paid for a friend's school fees, as her dad was one of them. That's pretty much all I know about them. She was a little bit embarrassed by it.

Well it’s not surprising you both agree, your posts have mirrored each other throughout the thread.

FREE THE #JAMGATE ONE! @Feelingathomenow

UGLE and the two Women's Grand Lodges all wish to keep their meetings single sex. If anything, the ladies feel even more strongly about it than we do from what I know. That's not to say that we don't work together or have joint social events on occasion. We recently formed the new Council For Freemasonry, which is going to make that relationship even closer. The lady Masons have "gentlemen's nights" of course, like we have ladies' nights.

Council for Freemasonry | England and Wales

I have absolutely no difficultly being in mixed company. I quite enjoyed going out to a Christmas dinner with many of my female work colleagues (when working in an infant school, men are in a minority). Sometimes though, it's nice to be able to be with just guys. We can talk and relax in a way that we couldn't in mixed company. The ladies seem to feel the same. Girls nights out are still a thing, are they not?

My grandfather was a Mason. I recall thinking it abnormal as a child so I can only imagine what I’d think as a adult.
I recall them going into a secret room to discuss secret matters. They had separate burial plots as well, (Canada).
Not normal!

Well, just a few members from those lodges who don't want misconceptions and falsehoods to go unchallenged, along with a few non-Masons who don't want to see people unfairly maligned.

Ah just caught the bus so got a few moments to give you a better answer. Was it you who claimed to be a psychologist..I think it was, but apologies if I’ve confused you with another poster on this thread. I’m interested in your stance. You haven’t said why you are so against Freemasonry.

You say you are “very glad other people think critically around freemasonry” but I think you’re confusing critical thinking about Freemasonry with being critical of Freemasonry. Critical thinking is looking at all angles and weighing up the evidence. I have done that, researching, speaking with Freemasons from several countries and taking part in similar ceremonies, this puts me in a better position to weigh up the truth about FM ( although obviously not with the same knowledge as someone practicing The Craft, however, this means I have no “skin in the game” - so ask yourself why I hold the position I do) it was disappointing when I asked for evidence someone (not you) called me childish!!

From my knowledge of FM, which I think, we would both agree, is greater than yours all the ridiculous allegations made against FM which I’ve summarised in an earlier post are spreading lies, and perpetuating a dangerous myth. As I’ve said many times on here, the truth matters. Lies similar to those perpetuated on here have previously seen Freemasons persecuted and imprisoned including by the Nazis. Given the cyclical nature of history we need to ensure such atrocities are not repeated. The best way to do this is to stand up against lies and always champion the truth.

I mention the psychologist because, if you are you will understand what passive aggressive is, I don’t think I have been, but maybe you could help me and point out where you think I have been so we can clear that up.

i don’t think, from your posts you have a problem with FM it’s men, powerful men that you seem to take umbridge with and sorry for whatever had led you to that position. There are some good men and nearly all FM men I’ve met have fallen into that category, I’m sorry if you’ve had other experiences.

Hope that’s cleared that up.

Wife of FM here, and all the males in our family are and have been FM through the generations. They raise a heck of a lot of money for charities and yes they all have each other’s backs. Usually successful businessmen, Chief of Police etc and nothing sinister, not in our city anyway!

What do you mean by this @Salita? "yes they all have each other’s backs. Usually successful businessmen, Chief of Police etc"

I looked at a few years worth of the Charity Commission info.
I then checked over the two big ones that the FM call non Masonic. Both were Masonic in that only FM and their families would pass the criteria for acceptance….
This brought me to 80% and is within their own standards which they set on their CC blurb which states 20% for others

So no FM bashing here, just facts

@PithyCritic where your take on the info falls apart.
No offence
Is the FM themselves calling stuff non Masonic when in fact it is Masonic.
If you check out application criteria you’ll see

🤯🤯🤯
blown it there me thinks..oops!

Yep
Thats part of the education grant and part of the 80% only for FM family
saved from tax free donations btw

Simple understanding of the term passive aggressive.
Its not exactly rocket science

Lets have a polite discussion

Was this English Scottish or Ireland grand lodge the commission were referring to because each grand lodge give different.
and have different charity numbers

I agree some posters have said some weird comments here about the Freemasons.

I’m, however, referring to personal attacks or / and patronising comments on MNs posting

Another nasty comment calling it my witch hunt!
Im posting financial facts here
I haven’t made comments about customs and other stuff the FM might get up to. I don’t care if they dress as dinosaurs and dance down the street doing the tango as long as they are not hurting anyone.

Another personal attack……. It’s not doing you any favours

Good question
I don’t know if the Charity commission is separated out by the Government by regions of the UK tbh
However the Charity Commission submission info I looked at ( of which their are 8 pages from many different Charities all FM ) were a random selection of the ones making the most money.
I think they were all England ( from recollection ). Including one called the Grand Lodge, They all had basically the same format and info re how much should go to charity, the charities purpose and all basically separated out the same categories re where the money is spent and how it’s made / invested and so on.

What you are looking at is the grand lodge from where you stay. And what that particular grand lodge gave
it doesn’t include what hundreds of individual lodges give.

8 pages worth of them on the CC
including ones called the Grand Lodge.
Those hundreds of individual ones, will have a separate Charity number, and will also be there. If they don’t then they must be piled into the local bigger one. There are ones on the CC with low £££

I picked the ones making the most money, to see how money is made and spent.
I then looked at FM website re criteria for some of the grants

im confused by ‘grand lodge from where you stay’….I don’t know what that means tbh

yes but you said you looked into the grand lodge
what the individual lodges give is not in that figure
but as you said you cherry picked the ones you wanted to look at then told us it covered all of free masonry making no difference between the other grand lodges
also by not adding all the lodges figures together the figures that you are spouting are wrong but you still tried to make it look on a lot of posts that it was accurate
im sorry but you have been wasting everyone’s time with made up figures to suit your own agenda

Were they successful businessmen and senior policemen before joining the Freemasons? or did other Masons give them a helping hand in getting work/jobs in front of equally qualified/able non Masons?

I think it's time I addressed the secrecy aspect of Freemasonry, which a lot of people seem to be concerned about.

Freemasonry is a society with secrets. I don't think that should be downplayed or apologised for. It adds a bit of mystique to our organisation, which makes it a little more interesting. This aspect is what fascinated me and attracted me to Freemasonry initially.

Having stated the above, not everything about Freemasonry is or needs to be secret and I think most of us now accept that, in the past, Freemasonry has taken secrecy too far, to the point where we wouldn't even discuss our fraternity at all or even admit to being members. Much of this had its roots in World War II. It has already been mentioned on this thread that the Nazis rigorously suppressed Freemasonry in Germany and, in the event of a German invasion, the same could have happened here. This principle of secrecy persisted and became a tradition. The result was that it fuelled accusations and conspiracy theories, which, because we never spoke out, then went unchallenged. This is something we are now trying to address by being more open about who we are and what our aims are. These are not secret.

The parts of Freemasonry we are supposed to keep completely secret are what are known as the modes of recognition. These are signs, grips (what people sometimes call handshakes but are not really) and certain passwords, associated with the various degrees. These hark back to the medieval stonemason guilds, which are most probably what our symbolic form of Masonry came out of. These guilds of actual stonemasons met and taught moral lessons based on the tools of their trade, very much like we do today. These stonemasons had various signs, grips and passwords which they used to demonstrate that they had a particular level of skill. The alternative would have been to actually build something, which would have taken a lot of time.

We use similar signs, grips and passwords today and promise to keep them secret. This is meant as a test of integrity. If someone can't keep such things confidential, how could they be trusted with other confidences, which would be much more important? They are also how, traditionally, Freemasons identify themselves as members. Occasionally, when visiting a lodge where I was not known, I was taken to a private room where I was asked to demonstrate my membership by showing the signs, grips and speaking the passwords. None of the modes of recognition have any relevance outside of Freemasonry.

We also don't like to go into too much detail about the content of our ceremonies. It is not because they are secret, strictly speaking but more that we don't wish to spoil anything for future candidates. Before I was initiated, I remember being advised not to look anything up beforehand because it's more enjoyable if everything is a surprise. I followed this advice and I am glad I did. It would have have ruined it for me if I had known what was going to happen.

So, that's the extent of the secrecy in Freemasonry. It is an important and very positive part of our fraternity and something we can be proud of, not ashamed.

No
I looked at quite a number of them on the CC. All of the ones I looked at were ones that made a lot of money…. I didn’t cherry pick them because they fitted my narrative I picked them because they had the highest incomes. I didn’t know what I was going to find. I was just interested.

One of them was called Grand Lodge,

The figures are not made up.!
Everyone can check out any charity they want on CC and follow the paper trail through to an individual charities work, criteria etc. from other website / source information or even a FOI request.
Financial information is there for who ever wants to do the research and the maths.
Which is what I did.
Rather that just saying that’s rubbish, you’re talking nonsense etc. What does that prove……absolutely nothing.

Ive tried to be informative on the basis MNs are usually interested in facts and proof.
Hopefully some MNs on here don’t run from that and have found it interesting.