Husband doesn’t want me working part time even though we can afford it

[ThatFunRubyHelper]

DH and I don’t have children yet. He makes a good salary working full time, and it’s possible for us to live from his salary but I work full time and contribute too.

I would really like to work part time as I want more time to properly clean the house, and spend time making healthy meals for us from scratch. On the weekends I don’t feel like I have enough time to properly rest too. I get tired quite easily and I’m honestly so exhausted from my work, on top of a few hours commute everyday. My DH is pretty energetic so doesn’t have this issue.

I’ve spoken about this to DH and he’s told me that he wants to send me abroad to a country where people work 11 hours a day 6 days a week to see what tired really looks like(then later claims he was joking). So I don’t have much understanding from him!

Am I being unreasonable to want to work part time?

@MumWifeOther
if you are even pining around missing your kids when they are at school now , how will you be when they fly the nest ? I’m too busy during the day to be having these thoughts and then I relish my time off and weekends with my dc. Its great.

Yes that’s exactly what I’m saying - women are nurterers by design. We are mammals after all.

Happy wife, happy life is so asinine
its a catchphrase not an instruction

I imagine I will take up a hobby or who knows.. maybe I’ll get a coveted part time job since they seem all the rage 😅 I’m not worried. I’m sure I’ll be able to fill
my days.

It rings true here 🫶🏽

@MumWifeOther even though you think I think my child is a “burden” at least I have my own life and identity outside of being a mum.

And I’m really happy for you. I’m equally happy to identify as a mother and wife first and foremost, at this time in my life. My children are now all in school but those early years having them all at home, were the happiest days of my life and I’m so grateful I squeezed every thing out of it that I could. ❤️

@MumWifeOther oh I’m sooooo happy for you too. How fake lol

So let me get this clear you’re comparing adult human female nurturing to a rat nurturing
sample size?
Qualitative or quantitative data
Tell Me how are you interviewing the rats & bats?
Look we all get arguing a pov online but you took it too far. Not all mammals are equal or comparable
i will let you gracefully drop your ill thought out point as it’s embarrassing to see you labour on

I can believe that

@MumWifeOther don’t pretend to be “happy for me” after making insulting presumptions about working mums and their children being burdens , which you still haven’t explained further or commented on.

So let me get this clear you’re comparing adult human female nurturing to a rat nurturing
sample size?
Qualitative or quantitative data
Tell Me how are you interviewing the rats & bats?
Look we all get arguing a pov online but you took it too far. Not all mammals are equal or comparable
i will let you gracefully drop your ill thought out point as it’s embarrassing to see you labour on

I don’t care about sample size or anything else.

I am literally telling you I believe women are nurturers by design. I think that’s why we have a womb, we have a menstrual cycle, we are able to conceive, give birth and breast feed. Mothers are in tune with their newborns and children, more than a father could ever be. This doesn’t suddenly stop when they reach school age.

You can fight nature if you want. I just don’t want to.

Ok I don’t actually care what you do. Happy now?

And just out of curiosity, what about if your husband changed his mind and wanted out of your marriage tomorrow? You’ve got no independence, you’re entirely reliant on a man who tomorrow could decide he’s in love with the lady at the coffee shop and never wants to see you or your kids again, you’re not particularly employable after years out of work, no recent work experience or qualifications, no contacts. It’s harsh but you only have to look on here any given day and see multiple threads where divorce has come as a complete and total shock in what the wife believed was a total happy marriage to last forever. Protecting yourself is so so important, not just for you but for the children because the jobs you’d have to take when it’s urgent and you need the money are not the most child-friendly ones, and the pension those jobs give you to retire on aren’t going to go anywhere close to funding the lifestyle you may want, but that ex husband will continue to thrive with no career breaks.

Do you ever do any book reading?

Who said I haven’t accumalated assets in the 13 years I’ve been married?

You do realise homosexual male couples also have children, are amazing parents?

Tell me what books redefine human nature?

Im sure they can be amazing parents. They still need the woman to have a baby.

Which would all be split in the divorce, and unless you have millions you’ll still need a job to support yourself and your children.

I just think there’s a lot more to it than you make it out to be, and children with working mums grow up knowing women can work too. It’s important for children to see their parents going out to work, especially if you have daughters, women can do ANYTHING, far more than just giving birth.

Yet you say no man can ever be as good a parent as a woman?

I saw my mum going out to work and believe me when I say, it very much cemented how much I didn’t want that lifestyle for myself. My daughter is free to choose whatever she wants.

That is my belief yes.

This.
No kids and you can't cope? See a GP please. That's not normal