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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Xmas day morning - AIBU here?

257 replies

HennyPenny42 · 24/12/2024 22:51

Staying at my parents’ house for Christmas with dp and dd (3), my sister is also here.
Sat around on Xmas Eve chatting about the order of the day tomorrow. I assume my dd will wake early (6ish) and I’m happy for her to have her stocking when she wakes up. I said ‘oh, she’ll probably have everyone up as she’ll be excited and want to show you all what she’s got’. Just got a groan from df, and pointed silence from dm and dsis said ‘she can show me stuff but I’m not getting up’. So if they have their way it’ll be me and dp getting up with dd to do stocking and them emerging 2/3 hours later.
AIBU to think that this is slightly mean spirited on Christmas Day?
They would never dream of letting us having a lie in by taking dd in the morning normally (obviously wouldn’t want that in Xmas day as I want to be there!) and refuse to get up before 8 when we come to stay, even if we’re up for ages before then. My dp’s mum would be so excited to get up with us and dd on Christmas morning and open her stocking. Am I making a bit deal out of nothing? I just feel a bit disappointed by my family but maybe I need to accept that other people just aren’t going to be as interested/excited about my kid as I would like! What would your Xmas morning routine be with your wider family?

OP posts:
DreamTheMoors · 25/12/2024 00:02

It’s one day.
She’s their only granddaughter.
I remember when my family sent the kids in to wake me up so they could start in on their presents.
Five little kids jumping on my bed and screaming wake up wake up wake up and yes it was early but it was Christmas morning and they were so excited and there was coffee waiting.
It’s one darn day.
It isn’t some gigantic sacrifice, is it.

Barney16 · 25/12/2024 00:03

When my teenagers started emerging bleary eyed at about 10am on Xmas morning I was ecstatic. There's no way I would get up at 6am for tiny children now.

AutoP1lot · 25/12/2024 00:06

We're at my parents'. They've asked not to be woken until 8:30, and if the DC open their FC gifts before that so be it. I'm slightly disappointed they won't get up earlier, but on the other hand they're older and will be tired hosting all day. No biggie.

CoffeeCakeAndALattePlease · 25/12/2024 00:07

I wouldn’t be keen, but I’d probably do it if I was staying with someone and their kids wanted to get up early.

We have family staying and I’ve said we’ll be downstairs for breakfast 8-8.30 ish. Kids will do stockings upstairs with us and we’ll have a coffee in bed to wake up a bit.

skyana · 25/12/2024 00:08

I think it's ridiculous that you expect others to wake up at 6 am for ur child's stocking opening. I wouldn't be bothered about my nieces reaction that early in the morning. It's ur kid, you wake up but others will see when they are happy to be awake

nosyupnorth · 25/12/2024 00:08

It's still pitch dark at 6am, not morning. If your DD is always up at that time I appreciate it may be hard to get her to deviate from routine, but I certainly wouldn't be encouraging getting up that early simply out of impatience for presents and definitely not disturbing the rest of the house bc you aren't able to get her to sleep to a reasonable hour. If she can't be put back to sleep and is unmanagable, a small present that won't be of interest to adults like some chocolate coins could be used to tide her over, but she shouldn't be waking others up or the grandparents missing out on the christmas morning experience bc you let your DD open your presents before morning.

Xmasbaby11 · 25/12/2024 00:08

Normal in our house. My dc will be up at 7 - wouldn’t dream of waking my parents! They will be up at 9 or whenever. Db wouldn’t care either - he’ll come over later.

we have family presents later anyway, all together.

TwistedWonder · 25/12/2024 00:10

Barney16 · 25/12/2024 00:03

When my teenagers started emerging bleary eyed at about 10am on Xmas morning I was ecstatic. There's no way I would get up at 6am for tiny children now.

Absolutely. Once my DS was a bit older and he wanted electronics and PS/XBox and a lie in I loved it

I was up before him having a breakfast Prosecco in peace waiting for him to drag himself out his pit.

lizzyBennet08 · 25/12/2024 00:11

Honestly I live my nieces and nephews but no way am I getting up in the dark to watch them open their stocking. Surely they can show them their haul a few hours later when it's a reasonable time .
I understand she is the light of your llife but honestly no one else is going to appreciate being woken at that hour except parents .

OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 25/12/2024 00:11

Why would the whole extended family want to see your child open her stocking.
She is your child, you and dh are her parents - so enjoy 6am.

I expect there are other presents for her, and for the rest of the family that can and will be opened at a decent time.

enjoy her excitement, but remember your parents have done it all before. It's your turn now, not theirs.

Littlemisscapable · 25/12/2024 00:11

6am is still dark outside.....santa might not have come yet 😉(it's too early)

Itsnotallaboutyoulikeyouthink · 25/12/2024 00:13

Don’t be silly. I mean I used to get up
with mine at 5am. But I have excited teens here now and they have been told
not until 9am.

Dillythedallyduck · 25/12/2024 00:13

I just think this is one of the "joys" of having smaller children, it's your responsibility to get up and entertain them until a more reasonable time. Look, the present opening will only take a few minutes then you'll all be sat around yawning at each other. By mid afternoon everybody will be tired and cross with each other.
Let them have their lie in then leave them to play with her and her new toys later on in the day whilst you have a sneaky nap on the sofa.

NovaF · 25/12/2024 00:17

They all have to have their sleep destroyed so your child can show them some toys?! Nothing mean spirited about not wanting to wake at 6am. You really dont have a leg to stand on complaining about them not ever waking to give you a lie in. Are they the ones that will also being cooking all day for you?

EntropyCentral · 25/12/2024 00:20

I’m amazed you expect anyone either staying with you or hosting you to start their day before 8am just because your child wakes up early!

Yeah. I mean, they're your kids. You want your 70+ year old relatives to get up at 6am? Fuck that. They have already done this in years past. Now it's your turn.

Eeerm. Let's just say they've had their turn (as is often said when talking about the nice stuff). They've had their turn! So suck it up.

OneRubyRobin · 25/12/2024 00:22

Kindly I can think of no reason why on earth any relative would want to wake up at 6 am. I think 9.30 is early enough. I wouldn't have wanted to wake up at that time for my own childs stocking let alone someone elses.

Holesintheground · 25/12/2024 00:22

They can't have it both ways. If they don't want to get up and share the present opening excitement, that's their call, but they shouldn't be surprised if next year you stay at your own place or go to your MIL - which is what I'd do. My parents were excited to get to be there for the present opening and it was well before they would normally get up.

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 25/12/2024 00:23

Are you making a big deal of this?

Yes.

It's their Christmas too.

ReadingSoManyThreads · 25/12/2024 00:23

YABU

You are now finding out that DD is only the centre of your universe. I really hope you keep her entertained with her stocking quietly and do not let her wake the rest of the household up. That would be really poor form.

I'm sure your parents will see the joy of her opening the rest of her presents when you all do the family gift giving later in the day.

DrCoconut · 25/12/2024 00:23

6 is a really early start. I'm never up that early unless I have to be somewhere unavoidable. I'd let people sleep until they are ready to get up.

itsobviousright · 25/12/2024 00:23

DreamTheMoors · 25/12/2024 00:02

It’s one day.
She’s their only granddaughter.
I remember when my family sent the kids in to wake me up so they could start in on their presents.
Five little kids jumping on my bed and screaming wake up wake up wake up and yes it was early but it was Christmas morning and they were so excited and there was coffee waiting.
It’s one darn day.
It isn’t some gigantic sacrifice, is it.

This. Its Christmas. It's meant to be about the kids. I'd be getting my arse out of bed for a healthy dose of innocent joy + wonder that Santa had come...thats where the magic is

Fraaances · 25/12/2024 00:27

I guess you’re learning that at 6am other people don’t think that your kid is as cute as you seem to think she is…

BorrowersAreVermin · 25/12/2024 00:31

DM used to love seeing DS open his presents. She lived over the road and would come over at 7am for him doing his gifts, then go home and come back a bit later for dinner etc.

Kids being so excited for Christmas and presents doesn't last for long, I wouldn't want to miss it.

Tahlbias · 25/12/2024 00:32

My parents, (well my dad now)🥺 is the one knocking us up to see my 2 children, open up their presents.

Floralnomad · 25/12/2024 00:33

Presumably they have got gifts for her that she will get later in the morning when everyone is up so why would they want to see her open her stocking ?