To be so disturbed by the male race currently

[honeypotter]

All the business with Lily Philips - how many men queued up to do what they did to her

And Gisele Pelicot

Are men really that obsessed with sex that they are so desperate to rape and queue up and be solely concerned with their own depraved satisfaction.

I know it's not all men but I'm feeling so disillusioned with men in general and it seems to be getting worse and not better.

Does anyone else feel like this? Also the only people I see posting about Gisele are female.

Where are all the men??

I'm raising boys and to be honest it's terrifying to look at my innocent children and the world they are growing up in.

Depressing or not it’s the truth, and as such a much more realistic position from which to start a conversation on the topic. Start from the fundamental truth that yes actually when it comes down to it all men are indeed “obsessed” with sex. Then given this universal truth you can discuss how this is managed within the type of society we wish to live in. But you aren’t getting anywhere with endless posts like this where women are constantly surprised men are
”obsessed” with sex, and others then saying “not not all men are are like that” and around it goes. Yes actually all men are like that, the “good” ones are the ones who are actually able to exhibit some degree of self control and are intelligent enough to understand what is and isn’t socially and legally acceptable in the society within which they live.

Of course there are good men.

But I think the fact that dozens of men in a very small area wanted to have sex with a drugged, unconscious woman offered up by her monster of a husband is what has made many of us reconsider just how many 'good' men there are and now many are a danger to women.

I have lots of nice men in my life who I love and respect. But that case, in a very ordinary town, shows just how many men in the general population are willing to at best not report a man seeking other men to rape his unconscious wife (nobody reported it) and at worst willing to actually go ahead and do that.

Can you see how cases like this indicate that the number of 'bad' men (men willing to hurt women, to be specific) is much higher than we like to think? And can you try to empathise with how that might effect the outlook of women?

This isn't snarky btw, I think that some men (and women) have dismissed this case as being an anomaly and therefore not indicative of wider social trends.

But what are the odds that in this one, unremarkable and run of the mill area of france, there are far far far more men who given the opportunity are rapists than there are in the general population? Slim, surely?

If you're someone who derives pleasure from sticking your knob into somewhere dozens of men have left their ejaculate, then there's no hope for you as a human being

I too find this aspect totally weird of these men. They must have had other men's spunk on their penises. Why isn't that a turn off? I mean, as a straight woman, the thought of another woman's "juices" inside my vagina, makes me want to HEAVE.

Fucking hell @Mummadeze I am so, so sorry. Animals.

The government and police disagree with you. It is formally accepted that the problem with male behaviour is getting much worse. So much so that these male headed institutions have labelled male violence against women and girls a 'national epidemic'. Have they been misled by the press and social media?

That was one of the things that especially horrified me and made me wonder about men in general, how many of them would if given the opportunity, participate in a crime like this. All those sickening perverts would have been leading normal lives and yet they all shared a grotesque view of women. I find it deeply disturbing.

@whathaveiforgotten ,

I understand what you are saying but it does still show a misunderstanding of statistics and how people want to find explanations for things where maybe there aren’t any.

If you look at a globe of 8 billion people, is it impossible to believe that by pure chance a population of bad men existed around one village in one country?

If you look at Shipman and other medical murderers, does it make you despair of medics in general?

And then you have the social media algos who will continue to feed you stories about bad men because you read that one. So, of course people end up despairing of men.

Nice man just isn’t a story.

yes, who’s going to stand up for the rapists of the world! You go @BourbonsAreOverated !

There are so many like you already, standing up for men’s right to rape, you’re in great company. If the women aren’t evil temptresses then the men are all victims acting out. Thats the only explanation.

Your comparing apples and pears. Lily is not a victim of anything, she's making money out of these men. She's gross and they are gross but it's up to them if it's concentual. I've worked with several women who regularly cheated on their husbands, one used to sleep with another colleague in the car before work. Some women are also ruled by their vaginas. Gisel was raped without her knowledge arranged by her husband that is absolutely horrific. The men involved must have sick perversion, some sort of fetish it's abhorrent. I think the case was so shocking because it's not something you hear of everyday thank god. I don't think many men would dream of doing anything like that. To answer your question no I don't worry about men. The thought doesn't really cross my mind I just go about my life I don't assume I'm going to be attacked by a man.

Lol you've hit the nail on the head!!

The easiest correlation to see in the human race, across all cultures, races, countries and lifestyles, is male overrepresentation in violent crimes.

Homicide and murder: 98.5% commited by men
Rape and sexual assault: 98.9% commited by men
Robbery: 87.9% commited by men
Aggravated assault: 77.9% commited by men
Arson: 83% commited by men
Mass shootings: 97.3% commited by men
Sexual abuse of children/pedophilia: 99% commited by men

So not all men, but whenever and wherever something awful happens, you can bet your fanny it will be commited by a man.

Can you imagine if the genders were reversed? Men would keep us in cages!

But we don't keep men in cages, because we are conditioned to believe in them, stand by them and support them, even though, in too many cases, it harms us or kills us.

Many of the men who raped Giselle Pelicot while she was unconscious had partners who were there, during their trial, SUPPORTING and STANDING BY them. Having children with them.

Serial killers have scores of women writing to them in jail, some wanting to marry them.

The first step to fight the epidemic of male violence is to acknowledge it, to recognise it for what it is and stop denying it. It is undeniable. The second, to stop condoning it and show absolute condemnation for any male who participates in this behaviour. Without those steps, we are complicit in the massacre of women and children, and other men, at the hands of violent men.

@Newbutoldfather

If you look at Shipman and other medical murderers, does it make you despair of medics in general?

Shipman would be the equivalent to one man assaulting many many women. What I mentioned was the fact that many many men in a small geographical area had all attacked the poor woman in question.

Let's make it comparable - if 50 GPs England (let alone one town) were found to have murdered even one patient each, let alone multiple ones, then yes I would be panicking about the possibility that many many more medics than I previously thought were a danger to society. I wouldn't be saying all medics were bad, just as I'm not saying all men are bad.

And then you have the social media algos who will continue to feed you stories about bad men because you read that one. So, of course people end up despairing of men.

As a woman, my real life social network will (and always has done) feed me stories about bad men because most women I know will at some point be at minimum sexually harassed in their lifetime and many sexually assaulted and raped. And they are much more likely to share those stories with women and girls in their lives than with men and boys.

It's not just the news feeding me stories of crimes against women and girls, it's my life experience and those of the women and girls I know.

I think perhaps this is underestimated by men who are 'good guys'. They don't realise how many women have been hurt by men themselves and are speaking from informed experience, not simply reacting to headlines.

I think it's an insult to Gisele Pelicot to mention her in the same sentence tbh.
Testosterone is very powerful in all animals, not just humans. But so are socialisation, civilisation, a belief system, the right experiences in formative years, intelligence, etc. Where they are strong, the human race can produce great men, but they sometimes fail and probably always will.

The fact that the 'government and the Police' are declaring this and acknowledging it, indicates a change in societal attitude and is arguably progressive as in the past it was very much not the case. You don't even have to go that far back to find proof of that change in acceptability. When I was younger so late 90s early 00s, every girl/ young woman friend I had had been subject to some kind of intrusion or assault so chest and backside groped at gigs, nightclubs, at work I had my backside hit by a file, assaulted at the office Christmas party, an array of things happened within my friendship and peer group.
Then there was the stuff on the TV, sitcoms like Game On where the female character was called deragtory names or even The IT Crowd in the 00s where the boss is trying get the female character to drink rehitonal so he can have sex with her. He has to pay her compensation and there is all canned laughter over this. Then other stuff like The OC or even Dawson's Creek where girls are to fight over and a higher standard of behaviour is expected of them, the girl who drinks excessively in one episode for example, is not a good person and for young men in those times girls were kind of like yours once you went out with them. Personally, I don't think things have got worse at all but I'm not sure they have improved either.

Although I wouldn't suggest them as a role model for anyone, the Incel community gives an interesting insight into male sexuality. They have very exacting standards for women, physically perfect but modestly dressed, capable of lots of "advanced" sexual acts but they should still have low levels of sexual experience. Although most men aren't Incels this double standard for women is still alive and well, they expect any woman who loves them to be endlessly sexual with them but still hate the idea that she's done any of these things for other men.
For me, the most telling thing about the Incel movement is that they absolutely hate the fact women don't find them attractive as they are, but more than that they hate the idea they should have to change, they think women should accept them as they are, that a woman should love them and therefore want them. It's the ultimate double standard, they still think a woman is lucky to get a man, any man
It relates back to men's nastier sexual fantasies, so many are focused on the idea a woman should do anything sex wise a man wants and if she doesn't then she should be punished.

Not pleasurable for her.

We are constantly bombarded with stories of 'nice' men. Throughout our history, who is credited with the greatest achievements, discoveries, acts of bravery and exceptionalism? Womens achievements are largely invisible by comparison. And still it goes on, with men vastly over represented for accolades and rewards.
On a day to day level, the lower bar for male behaviour means they are constantly over praised for the most basic acts, looking after their children, being a faithful spouse, running the hoover round.
And on here, every single time we try to turn the spotlight on the problem of bad men, several people try to derail with talk about good ones. This thread being a case in point. If nice men don't make for stories, we seem to spend a lot of time talking about them regardless.

This isn't a logical way of viewing the male population. You're talking about a tiny minority of half the population of the world.

Indeed. Presumably she was fully aware of that when she came up with the revolting idea in the first place.

except, not really? Unless it’s one big BIG coincidence that so many rapists we’re in one small village??

Couldn't agree more. The point about a lower bar for male behaviour in terms of things like looking after their own children seems to me to chime with the idea that men are all basically sex-obsessed and only a thin veneer of an awareness of social propriety or possible consequences keeps them all from constant raping and marauding. Like we must be profoundly grateful that the majority of men do not rape and maraud, because it's so difficult for the poor dears to restrain themselves.

A man I knew romantically said it to
me.
He was always saying that he was brave to say what men really think.
That comment was in relation to how men treated their daughters compared to their wives. Daughters are very special but partners, even wives, can be easily replaced….
’Every hole’s a goal Peggy!’
Yep, that one didn’t last too long!

The parliamentary under Secretary for safeguarding and VAWG says its getting worse. There is much concern in government about it. I also remember the overt behaviour and attitudes you are talking about and agree that there is some reduced tolerance for this. However unfortunately the problem hasn't gone away, it's merely gone underground.

Fucking hell. Read what I’m putting not what you think I’m saying.
im not standing up for the rapists. Far from it.

like I said I was abused as a child myself as have millions of women. Yet the majority is carried out by men. Why do they continue the abuse yet the majority of women don’t.

we need to stop children being abused and you will go along way to stop the cycle continuing.
Thats not a controversial view. Thats common sense. You’ll also stop many drug issues and violence issues by protecting children better.