I’ve lost 4 stone and not one person has noticed

[Lilyflame]

Just that really
aibu to feel a bit miffed.

My daughter’s mil made a huge fuss when my daughter lost a lot of weight. I had a quiet word in the end as she kept calling her miss slinky. D actually had a bad eating disorder and desperately wanted to eat but couldn’t. Mil was mortified.
I can understand if people don’t say anything. There are so many ways to put your size 10 in it. Best left.

People can get upset and offended so they are probably being cautious.

I think you would need to bring it up positively yourself if you want them to discuss it, congratulations!

I only comment on a person's weight loss if they have told me they are dieting. Then I would congratulate them on their achievement. If I am not sure of why the person has lost weight, I wouldn't risk mentioning it.

I've lost 3.5 stone since January last year (13.5 stone down to 10). It was through sheer hard work - dieting and exercise despite breast cancer treatment and chemical menopause. Two people have commented positively, the rest have been 'Oh don't lose any more weight' (I'm 5'6" so ten stone is a perfect weight).

I was miserable when I was fat, had high blood pressure, my knees hurt and none of my clothes fitted me. My own mother has said I'm too thin now - I'm trim and muscular because I work out 🤷 I have to keep my weight down now and for the future to prevent the cancer coming back (oestrogen related) but I really don't understand people's attitudes to my weight loss. I do wonder if people preferred me to be fat Monica 😂

I've lost 4 stone too. Some people have said I look better, but not many people have mentioned the weight loss unless I've volunteered it. I think it's not the done thing any more.

I'm wondering if they think I've got cancer or an eating disorder. One person did admit they were nervous about that, hence not saying anything.

People have more important things to talk about rather than commenting on your weight, sweetheart.

They could have at least said. Wow you look great, have you been away on holiday. That way it is polite and you know your efforts have been noticed.

I usually mention it to the person when I notice weight loss since I feel as if they want validation for their efforts….i maybe shouldn’t?

I didn’t want any validation for my efforts when I lost 3.5 stone, some people probably do. We’re all different.

People talk about all sorts of unimportant shit, all the time, it’s hardly like most people are spending their days discussing philosophy! Or do you mean they’re too busy talking about themselves to comment on other people, sweetheart?

Why would anyone comment?

I had a cousin who I had not seen for a couple of years. I saw a photo of her on Facebook, she had lost o lot of weight and she looked fantastic. So I commented on her photo and asked her what she had done to lose weight and she replied: “I just got cancer lol” Poor thing died a year later.
I will never comment on people’s weight loss again!

People do notice. It can be awkward to say something though unless they knew it was intentional. Well done you though x

Years ago, people would have commented immediately but we are in a changed world and people are scared of "putting their foot in it". Well done, that's a wonderful achievement and no mean feat. At the end of the day, you did it for you. Congratulations.

Years ago, people would have commented immediately but we are in a changed world and people are scared of "putting their foot in it". Well done, that's a wonderful achievement and no mean feat. At the end of the day, you did it for you. Congratulations.

Congratulations for your weight loss. What a great sense of achievement. (Huge smile)
Unfortunately people won't be supportive because this new you will be make them feel a way. (I've never personally understood this). It says all alot about a person who cannot be happy for others, because more than likely they are unhappy within themselves.
Perhaps they are worried that this new you will take away attention from certain individuals or you'll have a new found confidence, and it will make them feel uncomfortable. I may be completely wrong. But very odd to not notice someone loosing weight and not congratulating them on such a big thing 🤷🏽‍♀️
Sorry no one has noticed.

Op, I think people are responding based on commenting on an acquaintance’s weight loss, rather than close friends or family.

in addition weight is a very complex and emotive issue for many on here, so the fact you’ve lost 4 stone appears to have got you some snippy comments.

for friends and family generally we know of the person is unhappy with their weight, or trying to lose, or unwell. And thus it would be the norm, in my circles at least, to comment and tell someone how great they look, when they are successful. I’d not say anything to an acquaintance.

This.

I think it's important to focus on self-improvement for your own happiness and well-being rather than seeking validation from others. If weight loss is your goal, it can be empowering to approach it as a personal journey rather than something done for external approval. Remember, self-acceptance and kindness to yourself are key.

I used to comment when people had lost weight years ago,but now it’s considered rude to comment on peoples size.People will have noticed your weight loss but dare not say. Well done you!Im about 4 stone overweight and have struggled to lose it so understand what a huge commitment you’ve made.Its not easy so I admire your determination.

Rude

I’ve lost 2 stones (thanks mounjaro!) and no one has said anything. No one also said anything when I put weight on.
Why would they?!
I would hate anyone commenting on my weight, I never do it to anyone either, I think it’s rude.

I commented on someone's weight loss last week and instantly regretted it when I was told it was due to stress and grief. It's wisest not to say anything unless they bring it up!

It’s annoying but hopefully they won’t notice if you gain 4 stones either!
Well done on your amazing weight loss!

Congratulations! That had to take some dedication and work to lose. I agree with the myriad of above posters. People try harder than they used to about mentioning weight. People have noticed and I bet are silently congratulating you.

I am totally and completely impressed and even a bit jealous!

WTG!

If u have gone from 11 to 7 stone I’d be shocked that people haven’t noticed, unless they think u may have cancer, so haven’t mentioned it.
Hiwever if u have gone from 18 stone to 14 stone then I’m not shocked they haven’t noticed.
Most people don’t actually take much notice of what others look like they r too worried about themselves.