To ask what's the nastiest thing someone's said to you on here?

[Shinings]

Or the internet in general?

I really enjoy (for the most part) using mumsnet and have had some really helpful advice over the years and some good laughs. I know anything goes on here though, especially in AIBU and thats why I rarely post in this section. It's great to get honest advice but what's the difference between honest and cruel I wonder.

Mine was a couple of years ago when I posted on the relationships board about how I was struggling to overcome the fact that my ex partner and close friend ended up in a relationship a few months after we had split. It felt much worse as I had suffered a miscarriage a year before, cue some lovely poster telling me to basically get over it and that many people had suffered miscarriages before and I wasn't anything special - absolutely correct but that didn't make my situation any less sad or painful.

I can laugh about it now (the comment) but it was horrible at the time. I just can't imagine someone saying that to another persons face but people feel more confident behind a keyboard don't they. I'm sure others on here have worse examples. It only crossed my mind because I read a thread earlier and some of the comments were absolutely awful (I mean, really crossing the line and quite hurtful imo)

“Single parents have made their bed. They need to lie in it”

• I’m widowed.

I was told I wasn't a mother. My first child had died and my second was seriously ill (fortunately pulled through and is now recovered) so I was really struggling. That comment took me right back to those feelings of loss.

I was told that people I cared about who had died in tragic circumstances had deserved it.

Being accused of being a bot or a paid troll is a fairly common accusation.

TBH - sometimes I wish I was being paid to post on MN as I could do with the cash!!

MN can be so supportive sometimes — and vicious other times. My first ever post was on AIBU and for me it wasn’t necessarily the things people said in themselves, more how casual and throwaway some of the comments were — just so dismissive and judgemental and unhelpful — and knowing that the person typing them wouldn’t have thought twice about their words, yet I was really affected by them. I do (often!) wish people were kinder on here. One of the things I hate most, for example, is when the OP writes a long post asking for help or advice and someone replies with just TL;DR — I mean, how dismissive is that…?

Oh, that's utterly shit. I'm so sorry.

And all those who have experienced losses, I really have no words for some of what has been related here. I think those are the lowest blows. Why do people do that? More unMumsnetty hugs all round xxx

'Go take a long walk on a short pier'?

That is a fairly common and benign insult round here, Ive heard it hundreds of times.

When posting about my lived experience as a sex worker, I've been variously called a man; told I literally don't exist; asked if I need help to leave my extremely well-paying job and get a minimum wage job instead (why?!); been told I MUST be on drugs, or have a horrific background of abuse and trauma; been threatened with being reported to social services (my children are adults with their own homes!); that I shouldn't be posting at all as this site is for respectable women (😂); and that the poster hoped I would get AIDS and die.

In all honesty though I think the worst comment I've ever seen was that one about "brought a house" - I don't think I've ever seen something so pointlessly cuntish. And I've seen a lot 😂

Nowhere near as bad as most of these, but years ago I was called a “Tory Moron” for saying that there were net contributors and net beneficiaries in tax system. It stung because I’m generally a bleeding-heart lefty who has never voted Tory in my life, and was a SAHM at the time so had no axe to grind about paying taxes. I was just pointing out a fact!

on twitter with a well known chef. He wasn’t the one being vile we where debating and taking in what each other where saying

well one of his so called fans said I should die for what I was saying. I’d not long lost a family member and lost it with them and blocked said person. So did the chef.

Sometimes l despair at the way some posters hound and bully people on this site.

I've been targeted once or twice and the trick is to ignore or shut it down quickly then ignore. They want a reaction.

I was once told on MN by a poster that they hoped I killed myself in a thread about a neighbour dispute.

It was fairly amusing.

The other day I said on here my family got dressed up on Christmas Day and I usually bought a new outfit. I was told I was highly strung and to pull the stick out of my ass.

The thread was about wearing pyjamas on Christmas Day.

I started a thread about my ex only ever texting to ask about my children but not wanting to actually see them and someone suggested I pretended to him that my kids had died, apparently it was an hilarious suggestion as everyone that read the thread after that just came on the laugh about how hilarious that apparently was.

Thing is, I don't mind a robust debate or differences of opinion on specific issues, again, it's often a learning experience and if one has strong beliefs or attitudes, it's interesting to see what informs them.

Subjects like religion and the paranormal, and more recently "drones / aliens" fascinate me. I look forward to a good woo thread - but always there's a contingent of "you're nuts, there's no such thing, don't be ridiculous" that just try to over-ride and shut it all down.

See also the State of Fear threads from Covid. That was utterly bizarre and just contributed to paranoia and conspiracy ideas because we weren't allowed to talk about it all.

I'm an open minded sceptic and I've had some great "chats" on here, but Lord, some posters apparently woyld have either liked to see me burnt at the stake or medicated into submission lol.

That I'm selfish for choosing to keep my (very much loved) daughter, who has Down's syndrome.

I once posted (under a different name) at 4am saying that I was shaking and crying uncontrollably on the sofa because my then partner had flipped out, screamed at me for hours, thrown me against a wall and punched the wall next to my head. In this garbled message I wrote that I didn't know what to do. I got only two responses (as it was so late). The first one told me to call women's aid and get out with my DC. I replied that I didn't want to lost my house and it would ruin DC's Christmas. Again, to reiterate, I was just in complete shock after being attacked mere hours earlier, I'd had no sleep, I was scared, I was spiralling.

Then a poster called a colour+ a bunch of numbers came on to tell me that I was abusing my children and I was just as bad for staying with him. I instantly deleted the thread.

I'm not saying that if every poster had been kind to me, things would have gone differently - but I was posting because I was scared and had no one to turn to, and it was awful to be met with such cruelty, a mere few hours after I'd been attacked and still reeling. Anyway, I think of her everytime I respond to a DV thread.

Mine were all on Twitter related to the fact I wasn't a Brexiter and had a business that involved a lot of trade in Europe. Really really awful comments from people saying they didn't give a shit if I lost a business, that we needed to be brought down to their level and nasty personal comments about me being older and not that instaworthy etc - and serve us right if we had to work at Tescos etc -

Gosh, this makes my blood boil. How completely lacking in empathy must you be to write that in response to a post about DV?

My worst on here was when I was talking to another bereaved parent about the deaths of two of my children, a poster told me that I shouldn't have more kids as there was clearly something wrong with my genetics as two of my children had died (I didn't give the reasons on the thread so nobody knew what they had died from anyway) other posters were lovely and jumped to my defence and reported, but the poster said they were now fixated on me and would just keep reregistering to tell me I shouldn't have more kids.

The poster did get banned in the end and never did deregister and follow me around afaik (name changed) but that was pretty horrific.

God there’s some awful ones on here 😮

My personal worst on her was directed towards one of my DC 😡

I recalled something that my primary school age child had said, I noted that he was autistic and that made him very literal and I was disapproving of something he’d said about SAHMs.

A famous poster, who met David Cameron called him a ‘Tory Boy’. It was very hurtful. 😤

He went on to study politics at Uni, joined the Labour Party and campaigns all over the bloody country so she got that wrong. 😂

Like another poster, nastiest comments have always been on the feminist board/threads. Basically that I'm not feministing right and should fuck off. Makes me think good luck with the cause, sister, you're going to need it with that attitude.

Wasn't directed at me but another poster struggling with multiple miscarriages. According to one cruel person it was "Nature stopping the lives of children who would only suffer with you as its mother"

I've seen some horrific, vile comments on here, some racist, misogynistic and just cruel but that one shocked me. It also took a lot longer than it should have done to be removed despite several of us reporting.

Unfortunately comments like that are normal for the internet, whether it's any social media platform, sites like this or comment sections on news sites, the amount of hate for absolutely no reason is astonishing. Luckily the police seem to take online abuse much more seriously these days and will investigate if reported, many people think they are anonymous behind a screen but finding them is incredibly easy. Several people have been charged for malicious communication offences recently which has highlighted even more that it's not acceptable and you won't get away with it.

That they hoped my daughters got cancer and died 🤷