DH showing an unbelievable level of pettiness

[Owlsz]

DH takes and collects my friend's 2 children to school every day, as well as our two. We live a 20 minute drive from the school and it's on the way to DH's work.

My friend's child is having a birthday party but hasn't invited my DC despite being in the same year group at school. I don't see any problem with this as they have different friendship groups and my friend is inviting a limited number of children because of the cost of the event. My DC has indicated they would have liked to attend but understand why they weren't invited.

DH does have an issue with this and is refusing to take my friend's DC to and from school, starting from the next year, calling the non- invitation an insult. He is also grieved at my friend's attitude, so is probably using this as an excuse.

I've pushed him to reconsider but he has refused.

I cannot take the children to school as I'm at work. My friend has no other means of transport, there is no one near her that is travelling in the same direction.

Wow OP - why are you playing some kind of martyr (on your husband's time) to an absolute CF?!

Team DH all the way!!!!

I agree with your husband. Your DC would be number one on my list if you gave my children lifts to and from school everyday!

100% team husband. He is completely correct on this. One of my biggest parenting regrets was to accept less than acceptable for my children just because I was friends with the mum.

With your husband on this. She absolutely should have invited your DC

Are you thinking the DH is posting about his wife who gives the lifts?

THIS

I think it’s his shout really considering he’s the one doing the driving.

some people really are idiots

even if you don't have sufficient morals or kindness to want to include the extra child as a thank you for help received, surely anyone with half a brain would invite them just to keep their gravy train going

you've got to be a special mix of both selfish and stupid to cut off your nose to spite your face when it's so easily avoided!

Team husband over here.

So it sounds like she has already been displaying a bad attitude to this huge favour in some way.....

The favour is totally one sided, probably, your DH thought it was acceptable because the kids enjoyed being with each other and are friends,

and now she excludes those kids from the one thing nice she is doing and making an effort for?

Team husband.

And OP, why are you friends with this woman? If she's been displaying a selfish attitude to your husband, she takes but does not give, and she excludes your children? If you really look at the 'friendship' you have... is it actually two way? Or are you actually a bit of a walkover who is just scared at the idea of offending this user?

I think we all are 😂

I don’t think he’s being petty. They are taking advantage and you are blind to it.

I agree with your DH.

Team dh

Wonder if OP will show her DH the responses! 🤣

I’m with your husband on this one. It is an insult from your friend and she should learn better manners especially since your husband is taking her kids to and from school every day! Where is the gratitude?! Basic manners…

Your ‘friend’ is a CF. Your husband is right.

your husband is 100% correct and you are being made mugs out of by the other parents.

It’s not even the party, it’s the breathtaking ignorance of expecting free lifts for life.

you are completely in the wrong too as you are not the one giving the lifts and should support your husband, he is standing up to this user.

I don't actually think it's Petty. I can understand his issue and if it were me I'd feel like doing the same. I only wouldn't because I'm a people pleaser. It's incredibly rude of this person who benefits from free childcare/transport not to invite your kids to the party!

Agree with your husband, and it’s not petty at all. Your “friend” doesn’t seem to have any manners, and potentially her kids neithet.

He's driving so his choice. If your DC don't make the cut for the party, her DC don't make the cut for the car. Your friend is very inconsiderate.

I think she's got a brass neck tbh. I'm with dh I'm afraid!

Sorry, I’m with your husband on this. Your “friend” has been incredibly rude. Time for her to find another way to get her kids to school.

I must be petty too as I would feel the same as your DH. There’s certain kids for certain reasons that I insist get invited to her birthday meals/parties.

Your kids spend a lot of time with her kids & you’re doing her a massive favour & saving her money. I think your friend is very rude.

Why should she apologise? And why make an excuse. Just tell the truth: my DH was offended that our DC wasn't invited to the party and feels taken advantage of.