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Original poster

To not leave early because he was cold

173 replies

Rosebyanothername19 · 14/12/2024 22:07

We went to a winter Illuminations event this evening and my DH just wore a t-shirt and jacket, despite my reminders that it was cold and we should all wrap up warm... Apparently it wasn't going to be that cold...

About 1/3 of the way round he starts saying he is cold (Quelle surprise!). We stopped for some food, as was the plan. He is now trying to hurry us all up saying how cold it is and that he didn't want to be stood around for ages. I was trying to get DC to eat faster but they are slow eaters. I didn't let them go on the fairground rides as that would have meant more standing around and tried to walk through as fast as possible. We stopped to take a picture at one bit (the first of the day!) and DH just walked off as it was too cold to stand about taking pictures. The last straw was when we stopped to watch the light show. DH just said I've had enough I'm off and went back to the car. I tried to enjoy the rest of the time with the DC and not let them realise anything was wrong.

My DH is now saying that he is disappointed and I should have taken his feelings and comfort more into consideration.

Am I being unreasonable for not just rushing through the rest to get back?

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 14/12/2024 23:19

I bet you’ve never wanted the pathetic sulky man child more have you op?

RealHousewivesOfTaunton · 14/12/2024 23:20

What did he want you to do about, button him into his coat and sew his mittens into his sleeves? 😂 What a baby.

unsync · 14/12/2024 23:22

Is he Antipodean? Is this his first winter in the UK? Does he not own a coat? At least you know what to get him for Christmas - a nice hat and scarf set should be just the ticket.

Every time I read about fuckwittery like this, I thank my lucky stars I am no longer burdened with a sulky manchild.

PyongyangKipperbang · 14/12/2024 23:23

RealHousewivesOfTaunton · 14/12/2024 23:20

What did he want you to do about, button him into his coat and sew his mittens into his sleeves? 😂 What a baby.

Ohhhh.....perfect Xmas present!

A new jacket with a pair of mittens threaded through the sleeves!

LadyWiddiothethird · 14/12/2024 23:25

Ah the poor diddums felt the cold.What a fool.

whoactuallyreallycares · 14/12/2024 23:31

Man child!!!

CorvusPurpureus · 14/12/2024 23:38

I am an annoying person who very seldom feels/minds the cold.

I've spent 50 years with a parent/partner/grown up kid nagging me to put a chuffing jumper on, as I mooch about happily in baltic conditions in December in shirt sleeves, with my sweatshirt tied around my waist & a coat left in the car.

So, I layer up & wouldn't dream of whingeing when I get it wrong.

Op's dh had a car to leave an extra layer in, which he could then have easily retrieved if he found the evening a bit parkier than expected.

Honestly, pathetic of him.

clare8allthepies · 14/12/2024 23:39

SleepToad · 14/12/2024 22:20

Sadly your husband has fallen for a new infectious disease affecting males from 6-80...the wear as little clothing as possible to prove yer hard syndrome. Usually manifests in the wearing of shorts all year round. But can spread to encompass the tee shirt only or vest top in the snow symptoms.

First believed to be reported in postmen and Newcastle United supporters.

Only treatment is to allow patients to get hypothermia and hopefully grow the fuck up

Newcastle fans wouldn’t have complained about it though. They would have just had another pint (and then probably taken their shirt off!) 🤣

BibbityBobbityToo · 14/12/2024 23:44

He has been an idiot and naturally will do everything possible to blame you rather than admitting it.

DingDongAlong · 14/12/2024 23:45

The only excuse for him not wearing adequate winter clothing is that all his items are currently in a shipping container on the way from Australia to the UK (and he misjudged the UK winter weather). Otherwise he's a moron.

I am getting old and menopausal and I have zero time for all this man-child shit. I don't give a fuck what my husband chooses to wear, he's middle aged and has a responsible job, he should be able to dress himself by now. If he has a problem with the life skills he was taught, then his parents are the ones to discuss that with, not me.

RawBloomers · 14/12/2024 23:45

For context he is incredibly busy at work at the moment, very stressed and I'm tied up with work and DC a lot so don't have much time to do anything nice just for him.

I understand the doing nice things for each other and how that can really help make the being special to each other (which we should really all get from a lifelong partner) real. And I know from experience that it’s easy for that to slip when there are demanding children around.

But I wonder, because this is an inequality I see all the time - Does he often do anything nice just for you? Or is this a one-sided expectation where you are responsible for him feeling important but he isn’t responsible for you feeling important?

Mrsbloggz · 14/12/2024 23:46

I recon it was a deliberate plan designed to enable him to end things at his convenience. He (wrongly) calculated that you would consent to going home early.

Wolframandhart · 14/12/2024 23:50

Mrsbloggz · 14/12/2024 23:46

I recon it was a deliberate plan designed to enable him to end things at his convenience. He (wrongly) calculated that you would consent to going home early.

This. He is a selfish arsehole. If someone in my family refuses to dress weather appropriately, they just get cold and do not dare complain. It happens frequently.

whynotwhatknot · 14/12/2024 23:54

do you think he ddone it on purpose-it just sounds calculated-noone is that stupid

fivebyfivebuffy · 14/12/2024 23:54

I don't get why he wouldn't have a coat in the car at least
If you break down in winter you should really have something - I keep a coat, hat, gloves, umbrella and foil blanket inside mine
Note that I'm not organised in the slightest, it's crap that I've dumped in the car and not brought inside! (There's also a pair of heels in there and fuck knows what else)

Dollybantree · 14/12/2024 23:54

Rosebyanothername19 · 14/12/2024 22:18

Oh gosh! Thank you all so much! I was starting to wonder if I was really in the wrong!

Apparently if it was any of the children or me that was cold we would have been quicker (I pointed out that if that was the case I would have taken full responsibility!) and it's just because he is always bottom of the line and no one cares about him that we were slow! He thinks his feelings just don't matter.

For context he is incredibly busy at work at the moment, very stressed and I'm tied up with work and DC a lot so don't have much time to do anything nice just for him.

You just know this guy is a total prick in general. Reminds me of my friends dh who pulls shit like this, he’s a total narc and will ruin things even for his own children if he doesn’t feel like the centre of the universe.

Utter bellend, could not be doing with such a selfish excuse of a man.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 14/12/2024 23:59

You did take his feelings and comfort into consideration when you suggested to him he should wear a jacket.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 15/12/2024 00:00

Rosebyanothername19 · 14/12/2024 22:18

Oh gosh! Thank you all so much! I was starting to wonder if I was really in the wrong!

Apparently if it was any of the children or me that was cold we would have been quicker (I pointed out that if that was the case I would have taken full responsibility!) and it's just because he is always bottom of the line and no one cares about him that we were slow! He thinks his feelings just don't matter.

For context he is incredibly busy at work at the moment, very stressed and I'm tied up with work and DC a lot so don't have much time to do anything nice just for him.

Ask him if you wore high heels for a family trip to a theme park or something else involving lots of walking and didn't pack a spare, would he be happy about making him and the kids leave early because your feet hurt after 30 mins? Especially when he advised you to wear trainers?

healthybychristmas · 15/12/2024 00:01

I'd love to see him try to get away with that excuse at work.

Thisismetooaswell · 15/12/2024 00:02

You are not unreasonable. He is a twat

Yikesthathurt · 15/12/2024 00:15

Even my kids know, put it on so you can take it off if you need to. I am therefore the family pack pony of discarded clothing.

I’d have possible trampled him into the mud to put him out of his misery.

DarkAether · 15/12/2024 00:19

Rosebyanothername19 · 14/12/2024 22:18

Oh gosh! Thank you all so much! I was starting to wonder if I was really in the wrong!

Apparently if it was any of the children or me that was cold we would have been quicker (I pointed out that if that was the case I would have taken full responsibility!) and it's just because he is always bottom of the line and no one cares about him that we were slow! He thinks his feelings just don't matter.

For context he is incredibly busy at work at the moment, very stressed and I'm tied up with work and DC a lot so don't have much time to do anything nice just for him.

in this case his feelings should of been its cold wrap up and think of my family

IAm16StoneHalloween2024 · 15/12/2024 00:20

This is such an old, old story.

Man behaves like child.
Woman isn’t attracted to child.
Marriage goes downhill.

The vast majority of marriage breakdowns have some variation of this, and I have no idea why men don’t get it.

I’m not suggesting for a moment that your marriage is on the rocks OP, but if you have repetitions of this ‘looking after the extra child’ business then your attraction will fade, and he will be all bewildered.

ArabellaFishwife · 15/12/2024 00:24

Silly sod. If he couldn't take the cold, he should have good-naturedly admitted his mistake and say he'd wait in the car, making sure the rest of you took your time and enjoyed the event.

Moveoverdarlin · 15/12/2024 00:28

I’d be furious with him. If he carries on with his strop I would spell it out to him and say ‘Listen, it’s fucking December in the UK, guess what? It’s cold you moron. If the kids understand that they need a hat, scarf and gloves, why can’t you? I told you to wrap up warm, you didn’t and then moaned like a fucking toddler. You ruined the evening and we rushed the whole thing. And guess what? It’ll be cold tomorrow too. I don’t need to look at the weather forecast to tell you that, I know that because I’ve lived on planet Earth for XX years. In May you can go out with a t-shirt and jacket, until then just do as your told.

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