Shag, Marry, Avoid - Disrespectful in front of BF?

[SausageDogForChristmas]

Early in my relationship with boyfriend (one month/6 weeks in) Big night out with all my friends and a few mutual friends. A bit tipsy and my friends and I started playing shag, marry, avoid with celebrity names, some ridiculous suggestions, all light hearted fun. Looked over and BFs face was like thunder. He was furious and really angry. He went to storm off and mutual friends stopped him. He shouted at me that I was extremely disrespectful, I’m supposed to be his girlfriend. We all then went for a meal and the atmosphere was awful. He was barely speaking to me, a few of my friends tried talking to him and we went outside and I had to explain that it was just a bit of fun. Lighthearted and I didn’t mean to upset him. I wouldn’t care if he had done it.

AIBU? Was I disrespectful? It was just lighthearted fun. He did similar where I admitted to fancying a certain celebrity/singer. Refused to speak to me for hours, we had a horrible row.

@SausageDogForChristmas so two red flags. His sulking and behaviour in public and cold treatment as punishment.

the clingy you’ve only loved me right…

are there other things you are changing your behaviour over so as not to upset him or tip going around topics he doesn’t like?

Oh how silly! My DH knows well my love of Reece Shearsmith and Alan Rickman. 🤣 I get some sort of present concerning one of them every birthday and Christmas! And I've actually met both of them! He thinks it's hilarious and given I was absolutely tongue tied for the first 10 minutes with the former, I think he's fully aware I was hardly going to attempt to jump the poor man's bones!

What a miserable, insecure sod.

I personally find this game tacky cringy n played by airheads who have nothing positive or sensible to say to each other your poor partner

I would only play this with friends present not a partner and honestly I bet most people saying you are not being unreasonable would be up in arms if it was a group of men playing it.

Yes

I’m going to assume you’re maybe round the very early 20’s just going on his behaviour, although reading some of the comments from women in their 40/50’s saying they’d hate to hear their husbands play that game with their friends I’m guessing insecurities in relationships last way past your 20’s 🫣 Anyway I was already feeling on edge about this guy just from reading your post BUT the fact he makes this comment consistently is a MASSIVE red flag, like seriously girl, that red flag is slapping you round the face every time he says this and you’re still with him? I can promise you now few years down the line, perhaps with kids and maybe married you are going to regret staying with him, he cannot handle the thoughts of you even being with another man previously, he’s obsessive and controlling already and all this under a year?? This won’t end well, if he’s like this now I honestly dread to think just how far his actions will go in the future. He’s moved around a lot too you said. I’d be doing my homework on this guy and getting the hell out. I can already tell you’re trying to convince yourself nothings wrong but it is very much so. I’m actually cringing at the way he says that to you about not loving anyone else, the poor delusion eejit 😂

He sounds like a wrongun love. Quick to jump to anger. I would leave him now to avoid the hassle..

So this happened say 10 months ago and you're only just questioning it now?
Has something else happened?

I regularly tell my bf who I would throw him out of bed for 🤣🤣 celebrity wise obv. he doesn't care, but his friend gets raging when his wife does it 🤣🤣 it's not like I'm gonna just bump into Anthony Joshua in Tesco's 🤣🤣 thinking about it tho, if I did just bump into him, it would def be on a day I look like a squatter 😒

I'm 54, my ex 59.
Sat in bar in Portugal last year just having a drink . Started having a laugh about me getting off with a couple of brothers at a bar in Zante (went 1996 and 1998 ) which resulted in him being totally disgusted with me and not talking properly for 24 hours . Apparently he should have known about that from 27 years before ! ..also didn't approve of certain trousers to work and being on WhatsApp at 11pm . He finished our relationship by text after 6 years because he read completely platonic messages between me and ex husband deemed it all 'inappropiate ' lol (we've got 2 kids) blocked me , changed locks on door so couldn't get my stuff back at his house . 10 days later with another woman, and this is the thing .he wasn't cheating, he went online instantly
Should have left him years ago !

My husband has given me permission to shaggy Tom Hardy if he ever decides to make a pass at me!

Oh gosh I think you need to finish this. He sounds like he is going to be far too clingy. If you are older than 21 of course you are going to have loved others before, he makes me think he is going to be too reactionary down the line if this is what he is like when things are so new. Hope you make the best decision for YOU and not only him.

Whoop whoop its the sound of red flags a flying!

End it and keep him away from you. The game might be tacky to some but his behaviour is alot worse. Not your job to work out someone's insecurities and manage them.

Best of luck ending it ...he sounds like a stage 5 clinger

Well if I was out on a date and he and his friends were playing that game I wouldn’t be very impressed. I would have handled it differently but it would have been a major turn off.

Regardless of the fact he sounds like a twat, would any of you really want to hear your bf and his mates discussing female celebrities in that way, in front of you? I wouldn’t.

SMA - not a good game for mixed company.
Boyfriend going off on one - time to sack him. Bye, love. Block.

I think true loyalty is when your only interested in each other worked grandparents they had beautiful marriage for 50 whole years and still was besotted with each other
It's all about what you want out of a relationship like if you fancy Brad pit and thats cool but what if he found the fact that your playing games as not taking your relationship serious Your partner might want that sort of relationship where there isnt any looking elsewhere he should nether make you feel uncomfortable though he talk you like adult should not throw looks to make you feel uncomfortable that's red flag.

I think your not ready for relationship if you still can't get over your teenage kicks and committed though

Like we all go through a stage where all krush on people like teenage girls but when do we grow out of that and be committed.

So many people try stay in relationship whilst the people in the relationship them self are not ready for a relationship.... but there's nothing wrong with that girls just wanna have fun and Cindy would say babe let your hair down go to few party play spin the bottle have a laugh you only live once then settle down with a guy after.

By the way might get hate fir this or some of you might there isn't relationships out there with full commitment but I have been grown up round stable relationships and my grandparents would nether want to play them games if women come in the telly my grandad would grab my mamma and dance

You sound quite young as still playing games babe like I'm in my early twenty amd I'm only just starting to settle down I think over all you need to have fun and not bother about relationships until you have found your breath more than Brad pit babe.

...what? 😂

I'm mid 30s, married ten years to the absolute love of my life. Literally obsessed with each other. Does that mean that my brain should immediately forget the lifelong silly crush it's had on Reece Shearsmith or Alan Rickman?! Should DH's brain forget that Winona Ryder is very pretty? Neither of us care. I think it's sweet, he thinks it's funny.

They're just celebrities. It's harmless, no one is actually in love with them. As if any of us would stand a chance anyway! I met Shearsmith and stood there blushing and garbling like an eejit for ten minutes until sense kicked in! Hardly going to leap on the poor bugger in front of my DH, and if I did I think I'd be under a restraining order and in a mental health facility. 😂

My grandparents were married for over 40 years. Grandma still had a right crush on Marlon Brando!

Goodness me, don't clutch those pearls too tightly.

It was a bit of light-hearted humour in my book. Look on the bright side, the relationship is still very young, and you've already witnessed a clash in opinions. I don't know the guy, obviously, but, this would be a huge red flag for me. He might just not be on same SOH wavelength, or, he's the possessive, jealous, controlling, narcissistic type. I'm going with the latter. DTB.

He's controlling because he doesn't want to hear his girlfriend talk about who she would pick to shag in a lineup of men?

I think that what you did was wrong but he overreacted massively. This early I'd end it.

Mid 30 and not mature enough for a relationship your like teenage chasing celebrities grow up.... then again my body younger than your probs why my bf and me are to busy actually doing it and not playing stupid games lol

What a strange comment. I think someone's been on the Christmas mulled wine a little too early!

You are both embarrassing.

Perhaps you should have played this just with the girls as men haven't got the same sense of humour as us,I know it can be hilarious with your mates but not his,much better just for the girls.

Are you all very young ? Sounds pathetic