AIBU to feel completely distressed by the viral video of the aftermath of onlyfans worker Lily P 'sleeping with' 100 men?

[MumOfOneAllAlone]

I've tried to word this carefully.

Lily, an onlyfans star, aged 20something I'm guessing, slept with 100 men in one go, as part of a documentary.

Following this, she's on camera crying. She says her eyes hurt as some of the men ejaculated in them, despite her saying no.

My heart is broken for this girl. Im a feminist but I've never thought of sex work as being empowering?

Surely, the empowerment of sex work has failed this poor girl? And surely the 100 men who agreed to do this are criminals???

I'm so angry. You could see in the video that Lily is realising what a mistake this was and is very traumatised.

Anyway, didn't see a thread on this so thought I'd post. My heart goes out to her, and my brain feels very angry at those who failed to protect her.

The Bonnieblue person said in an interview that she has stamps saying "I want to fuck Bonnie" and "I fucked Bonnie".

She said she stamped them all over her dad's arms before he went down the pub.

She said her family support her 100% and she's been able to change all their lives.

I totally understand the appeal of the quick money and them using their looks and the shock factor to cash in.

But doesn't something about it just seem completely off.

Only time will tell .

They may be taking the piss out of women but to me that just shows the level of internalised misogyny. Youth short lived so for their sake they should invest their money wisely.

Yeah it is dangerous health wise. But she wasn’t violated just because she got semen in her eye. If you don’t want it in your eye, don’t tell people they can ejaculate on your face full stop - it WILL go in your eyes. She was also not crying about that, she was complaining it was in her eyes and hair whereas apparently her genitals felt fine which shocked me because I’d have fifty shades of cystitis from 10% of what she did.

Theres nothing to suggest she wants or would appreciate sympathy. I generally don’t offer sympathy to people that aren’t even complaining about what they’ve chosen to do.

There are former porn stars that don’t come out later and say those things. Some may still feel them sure, but that doesn’t mean we can assume that they all will. No one can assume that because something applies to some that it will apply to all.

When there’s zero evidence to the contrary there’s no reason not to take her at her word and afford her the same respect we afford to anyone when it comes to speaking for themselves. The alternative is protecting our own narratives onto someone we don’t know and have never interacted with on any level.

The recording of the woman promoter or whoever disgusted me. She sounded so gleeful about making connections.

Shes employed by someone whose business is getting fucked by men. It’s probably part of her job to make contacts. What did you expect her to do - cry in shock and try to stop it?

Exactly, people are making assumptions that this woman is a vicim, that this is her reaction to some childhood trauma. No one has a clue if this is the case. People say the men she sleeps with are exploiting her - but I can't say I agree that the 18 year old virgins she targets are exploiting her. We all know how immature some 18 year old boys/men are. I think the older, more experienced person (her) is the exploiter in those scenarios. When they're older and wiser, I suspect many of the lads will regret the fact they lost their virginity on camera to her.
She deliberately targets virgin teenagers and married men and brags about it. If a man was doing this, you'd all think he was a complete creep.

I spoke to my DS about porn and how it isn't what sex should be like with a loving partner. I would have been devastated if he had lost his virginity to one of these women instead of his first girlfriend who he really loved.

I doubt it's physically possible for a man to have penetrative sex with that many women in such a time frame, but assuming it was, would there be an outpouring of sympathy and concern for him? Would anyone assume it must be as a result of low self esteem, daddy abandonment issues, lack of love in childhood, MH problems, vulnerability or anything else? Or would they just pull a face, roll their eyes and immediately turn their attention to being concerned for the welfare of the women who'd agreed to sleep with him?

your right to presume but then dont people get seconds when they are busy having affairs etc ?

She’s a grown woman that’s chosen to do this, and is at liberty to regardless of how anyone else may feel about it. What she feels about it we don’t know, we can either take her word for it or decide she’s lying and create our own narratives. You can believe whatever you want about why she’s doing it or how she really feels about it, but the truth is you don’t know. I don’t know either, but I don’t need to any more than you or anyone else does. It’s her life and her business.

Would I do it? No, but that’s my choice. She’s free to make a different one, and whatever her reasons may be she’s entitled to do that.

I don't think I've ever mentioned I agree with people having affairs.

in an equal and caring society people should feel empathy for both sides,

Imagine if we had a guy putting out videos of him “nutting as many girls as I can in a weekend” and bragging about taking the virginity of 18 year old students. We’d find him utterly abhorrent. Not cry about what a victim he is and how he’s a lost little boy.

tru but you was making the point that sloppy seconds would put people off, but it does not as using the affair as an example people still have affairs and enjoy sloppy seconds so to speak, so in many ways this is no different

Well she was crying. In my experience that is not a sign of someone happy or expressing contentment and well being.

😂There's not many people who are bonking their DHs and affair partner in the same room straight after each other.

I presume most people at least shower before shagging the other one.

If a 23 year old man was being penetrated by 100 men, and had others profiting from him doing so, I'd feel the same sympathy and concern

fair points on that one, unless they are swingers or a throuple relationship etc

Yes, I think swingers and throuples probably are used to sloppy seconds.

I don't know because I've never done either.

Interesting point though.

Have you never cried and then promptly got over it? People cry for reasons other than deep emotional distress and turmoil, and it isn’t automatically indicative of lasting unhappiness or a troubled mental state.

You’re choosing to read into it in the way that best suits what you want to be true.

back to the case at hand the only way to protect the individuals from this type of situation is to outlaw the practice of eg 100 people at once,

that said when it would be proposed to be outlawed how many women would then say the nanny state and the govt infringing on the rights of individuality and what that individual chooses to do with their body etc @MumOfOneAllAlone

Her requests weren't 'flagrantly ignored' and I would not agree she was violated. She consented to men ejaculating on her face. It's not really possible to control where it goes when this happens, a man can only try to avoid eyes. She could have changed the parameters at any time, withdrawing consent to have her face ejaculated on. She didn't do this, who knows why. Probably because it's good 'content' to sell. But she wasn't violated.

You're justifying rape, and now you're getting off on the very thing you claim to find so immoral. Like so many hypocritical and misogynistic men who are very troubled by the idea of a woman saying no but will castigate her for saying yes.

I can only wonder why it troubles you so much that a woman could refuse you even if she didn't refuse someone else.

She put herself in that vile situation, and wants to have sex with 1000 disgusting men next time.
It’s just so grim. No sympathy for her.

There are an awful lot of apologists on here. I am all for liberty, but the degradation of a woman like this is unacceptable to me, and most in a civilised society. Thankfully.

What about the degrading of 18 year old virgins who were probably shy and inexperienced with girls and were probably embarrassed as their mates had all been with a girl and they hadn't?

So the women used them to make more money.