To not keep my mouth shut..

[arcticpandas]

So DH loves romantic comedies. Think Love Actually, Pretty Woman, Bridget Jones etc. I don't but each to their own. But certain movies have not aged gracefully imo. Think Pretty Woman. Is it romantic to pay a prostitute? And Bridget Jones. How overweight is she? Not at all imo and yet it's a big part of the plot. Also when Hugh Grant touches her butt it's supposed to be exciting when in fact it's sexual harassment. Maybe it's me getting old 40+ or it's the whole metoo débâcle that has made it impossible to not notice and be annoyed about misogynie and sexism and bodyshaming in movies. My DH thinks I'm a bore and that "it's just a movie" and I get that. Yet I have to either point out what's upsetting if I'm in the living room, or I have to go elsewhere.
So
AIBU - Yes, just shut up and let your DH enjoy his films.
AINBU- No, you are right to point out blatant sexism.
I am seriously in doubt about this one since I do get that DH wants to relax and not having me nag but also I find some things too offensive and I feel I need to point them out since he doesn't see the harm.

I totally agree

I never thought she was portrayed as being overweight. More that she was an average sized 10-12 woman, but she herself was comparing herself to the stick thin models of that time.

I honestly wouldn’t even think of getting worked up about stuff like this. They were films of their time and they can still carry important messages about being comfortable in yourself if you want to look at it more deeply. (I don’t).

Certain ‘societal standards’ maybe different now, but that doesn’t mean these films are bad/offensive. I certainly don’t find anything offensive about them. I enjoy them for what they are and don’t think anymore about it.

I quite agree

I still love watching Carry On films

Love Actually is actually one of the worst films ever and I would LTB for even watching it.

I think I would tell him why you have no interest in watching them but leave him to it if he still wants to watch.

Just because you had a thought you dont have to share it

They’re old fashioned films and attitudes were different.

You used to say live and let live......

My dh and I watch so very different programs so I don’t think you are being unreasonable. It’s very much horses for courses in our household.

Definitely with you on the psychological dramas

I much prefer a crime drama / psychological thriller over stuff like rom coms.

My DP likes anything about Vikings, Knights Templar and WW2. We have VERY different tastes 🤣🤣

YANBU. The Two Ronnies was on this morning and whilst they've got some classic sketches there are some that are shockingly sexist joking about men with their secretaries, size of women's breasts etc etc. Our culture has progressed so much in just a few decades.

I know, it’s a shame. Ronnie Barker was gifted with his use of words and sometimes on BBCR4xtra they repeat Lines From my Grandfather’s Forehead and most of that is still good listening.

In no way a romantic comedy - but I saw Conclave tonight, it's brilliant, go see that.

Let him enjoy the films. Too much criticism kills relationships

Watch Paint Your Wagon.

I. Think you need to get a grip!! For goodness sake c aren’t more important things going on!

Isn’t the whole point of Bridget Jones that Grant is a pervert and she’s weak for thinking it’s flattering. Then she sees him for what he really is? Before Me too highlighting misogyny and how to deal with it- not saying it’s sexy i don’t think

My mum didn’t like this in the seventies. Or Benny Hill or James Bond or things she thought were racist so we didn’t watch them. I suppose it just depends where your line is, and this is going to be an individual thing. But it could certainly cause problems in a relationship if your ‘lines’ are far apart.

That was my era and I hated the blatant sexism. TV was very much run by and for men. Even though it still is, political correctness got rid off a lot of the sexism.

Many of those comedians started out in working men's clubs and told a lot of wife and mother in law jokes.

Are you me?

OP I would be very irritated by a partner virtue signalling when I was trying to kick back with a film. It’s really dull.

I had a friend once (no longer friends now, incidentally!) who was like this. I remember telling him how excited I was because me and DS were reading Harry Potter together and he was really getting in to his reading. Rather than being happy for me about me sharing this, I got a lecture about JKR as he is incredibly woke. It was really tiresome. Like someone picking at where you get your clothes or what you eat because they reckon they’re on the moral high ground with all choices.

Oh god you are the definition of a snowflake.

Pretty woman is dire. I won’t watch it.
Most films are daft and nonsensical.
I think make your point op do your dh knows that you won’t be watching them, then leave it.

This reminds me of when dd and I were discussing the film Cats and how bad it was. Dd stated that she couldn’t stand watching the parts were the cats were dancing en pointe as they didn’t have pointe shoes on. Dh chipped in, you are focussing on that when the entire film is total nonsense. He did have a point.

@Errors ha, are you a Tarantino/zombie lover too?

Same age when I married dh
Certainly has never felt inappropriate

If I had to only go out with teenager boys at 17, I don’t think I would have bothered

They were ridiculously immature and didn’t drive. Most were still doing homework or living at home

Are girls no longer more mature than boys?